social anxiety, which remedy?

I am 45. Have had strong social anxiety for 25 years. In some situations, I use valium. I want to live my life without having anxiety. I avoid lots of situations like parent meetings, partys and all kind of gatherings. My head get hot, I shakes, cold sweet, can get stiff of fear.
I am a kind person, never hurts others, dislike very warm days, strong sunshine, have migraine caused from hormones, 5,5 feet tall, 66kg, fair skin, brown hair. I easily worry, I am not thirsty, like being alone, but also like company of mykids and husband, not visitors.I love music and listen to it. I have no depression, can be very sensitive to sounds at home, like people talking at the same time as tv is on.When I focus on my dearest hobby I feel calm.I am not impulsive and don`t like new happenings.