Please help! My nine year old has a constant sniff

Hi David,

thank you so much for considering my case.

Please find below my answers to the questions.

Kind Regards,

Florinda


1. Describe in detail the main problem - appearance, colour, shape etc. What happens, when it happens etc.

My son sniffs very frequently throughout the day. He does not sniff much when in bed at night asleep. The sniff is worse in the morning and at night. When he sniffs, his right nostril sucks in and he contorts and twists his mouth to the right side so that his left cheek sucks in. Additionally his whole body jerks when he sniffs (if he’s holding a drink he has to be careful he doesn’t spill it when he sniffs). Also when he blows his nose, he rarely can get anything out. You can often hear a clicking noise in his nasal area which does seem to indicate a real blockage that is hard for him to shift when blowing his nose.
Just before the sniff began, he had started to squint incessantly. He did this because his eyes would water and sting and his vision would go blurry, so the squint was in reaction to this. The sniff is worse when he is stressed or nervous and it was the same with the squint. He still squints when the sniff is bad, which can often be when he’s nervous or stressed.

2. Describe any pains or behaviours associated with the symptoms.

As mentioned above, often worse when agitated by stress or nerves. Also my son says the sniffing makes him feel really angry because it annoys him so much. He worries he will always have it for the rest of his life.

3. Describe anything that makes the problem worse ie. position, temperature, food etc.

Oranges and orange juice. He usually cannot finish peeling an orange because his eyes start watering and he starts sneezing.

4. Describe anything that makes the problem better ie. pain is better for cold bathing or at night in bed.

At night in bed it is usually much better. Also it is relieved a little when pressure is applied to acupressure points on face.

5. Go through each symptom or problem he/she has, doing the same thing, even if the problem does not seem connected to any others.

N/A

6. When did each problem start? What happened around that same time?

This is a difficult subject to talk about but may well be an important factor. The squinting started around the time that my son disclosed that a parent of a friend he used to go and play with (we cut contact with the family 18 months ago when we became suspicious of some odd things the parent said to us) had been sexually abusing him. E.g. Asking him to show his private parts for a reward, taking him to the woods and playing hide and seek, when he found him he would do this weird tickling starting at his shoulders and slowly moving down until just above his privates. My son would tell him to stop when he got close to his privates. The parent would tell my son not to tell anyone or his parents (us) would be in big trouble. This parent also made comments (after talking about a child who was bullying my son at school at the time), he said that if anyone ever annoys him (the parent), he’ll cut their head off with a chainsaw. This has led my son to be very scared of this parent and his farm tools.

In fact it was this fear that stopped my son talking about this sooner, regardless of the many chats we had with him 18 months ago regarding what is inappropriate behaviour between an adult and a child, in efforts to try to find out if anything did happen. My husband was totally convinced back then that nothing had happened, as he went on a walk with my son and had a father-son chat about things and was convinced that my son would have told him if anything had happened. He also had another chat with him to make sure and I also had several chats. We really didn’t believe anything like this could have taken place as he used to seem quite happy to visit this friend and surely he would tell us if anything was happening, especially if asked. At the time we didn’t know anything about how sexually abused children behave, and how hard it can be for them to tell what’s really going on. It is incredibly distressing to find out that this sort of thing was going on and your child was terrified to tell you.

In fact it took my son over a year to tell us what had been happening. When he got home from school one day earlier this year he told me he had been learning about adults who use emotional blackmail. Initially I thought they had a teacher telling them about it, but in fact he had read an article in a magazine. I asked him if anyone had ever done anything like this to him and he said yes that parent did. When he told me exactly what, I was horrified. I didn’t mention to anyone other than my partner about it for a while as was not entirely sure what the best course of action was. My son did not want us to mention it to anyone, so to do so felt like breaking his trust. However at the time I was in a high risk pregnancy and when my father died back in May I found it very hard to cope with the stress of it all. I couldn’t bear to think that my little boy had been through this. I finally confided with a few people, partly because I was struggling to decide what was the right thing to do. I mean if your child tells you something like that, and you know other children are visiting this parent’s home, surely it is not the right thing to remain silent about it?

I finally told the head teacher at the school who got the relevant authorities involved. This was devastating for me as I had to let my son know I had broken his trust. When I explained that I had to do it to protect other children and that I was so sorry to have had to disclose about it to others, he was very understanding. I let him know that two women from the police and social services needed to come and speak to him, but not to worry as they are all about protecting children, and for the best result for his safety and other children’s safety is to tell the truth about everything that happened. It seemed that that was the right thing to say as he let me know everything else that had happened (previously he had only said that the parent had asked to see his privates in exchange for a reward and had said that he did not show his privates). However it turned out he had shown his privates and that it happened more than once and that the parent in question used to do that weird tickling in the woods and threaten him not to say anything. Also the parent used to knock on the bathroom door when my son was on the toilet and go in and chat with him, which my son thought was a bit strange.

When I asked him what made him decide to tell us he said he would think to himself ‘how long will I keep this a secret for, until I’m in my seventies?’ Also he said that the parent has done a bad thing and it shouldn’t be kept a secret. Since coming out in the open about it, my son has been having panic attacks and behaving out of character at times (he is usually a laid back easy going child). However, I sought advice from a sex abuse counsellor who said it is much better for the psychological health of the child to come out with it now than bottle it up for years. In fact this goes in line with what a friend of mine said who was sexually abused as a child. She never told anyone until she was in her teens and has had a lot of issues to work through. Her Dad even questioned her at the time of the abuse and asked if that person had done anything to her but she ‘no’ as she was too scared to say anything. The awful thing in my friend’s case is that when she did finally come out with it, her Mum did not want to hear it as the abuser was a friend of the family. The sex abuse counsellor confirmed that the worst thing for abuse sufferers (especially children) is to not be believed.

7. What is his/her character like? What kinds of fears or anxieties does he/she have? What makes him/her irritable? Flesh out his/her personality.

He is usually an easy going child, happy and fun loving. He is very patient and tolerant for his age, and this shows with how he is with his naughty little sister (most of the time!). However, he understandably gets frustrated with her at times as she can be quite demanding and difficult. When this happens he can yell at her. The friend’s parent situation (mentioned above) has caused him to become quite nervous and fearful at times. For instance, one time we were watching tv and he suddenly jumped up and felt really scared for no reason. He said he didn’t know why he was scared and that maybe it was to do with that parent situation. Straight after he jumped up he started sobbing and said that his stomach was hurting. This became a pattern for several weeks where ‘the fear’ (as he called it) would come over him. When it was at its worst he said he felt it day and night, but I noticed the worst time of day was evenings. He would announce ‘oh no, I’ve got the fear thing’. This fear was about dying. This has recently become a fear of no one else existing in the world except for him.

Also he has behaved aggressively a few times since the parent situation came out in the open. E.g. When playing football in the park, a boy on his team had to go and have a drink. My son practiced scoring in the goal while he was gone, but boys on the other team said that they were still playing and that my son had scored for them. My son became furious and once they began playing properly again he aggressively tried to score a goal. Finally he threw himself at the skate board ramp and hurt his arm (only bumped it but it really hurt him at the time). This behaviour is totally out of character for him.
My son is normally a kind and gentle natured boy and to see him go through this and to know what he’s experienced is pure torture.

8. What foods does he/she crave or hate? What drinks does he/she crave or hate? Is he/she sensitive to anything he/she eats or drinks?

Foods he craves: bread, biscuits, cereal, chocolate and oranges. Food he hates: celery, cooked carrots, rice pudding, porridge and anything else that’s ‘mushy’. Drinks he craves: orange juice. Drinks he hates: nothing specific
Sensitive to: possible allergy to cashew nuts, possibly oranges and pine nuts

9. How does the weather or season affect him/her?

We have considered that one possibility is that he may have developed a pollen allergy as a reason for the appearance of the sniff.

10. How have all his/her milestones gone? Does he/she have any issue with speaking, learning, walking, climbing etc

He has severs disease (also known as calcaneal apophysitis. Definition: ‘It is the most common cause of heel pain in the growing athlete and is due to overuse and repetitive microtrauma of growth plates of the calcaneus in the heel.’) Speaking was slow to start with but he has caught up with his development now. He is ahead for his year with most subjects at school. He is quite sporty and fit. Plays a lot of football.

11. How is he/she with socializing with others?

He is very sociable and easy going. In fact the parent (mentioned above) used to say to us ‘that boy of yours is too trusting’ and that we had to be careful of that. This makes me furious to look back on such remarks.

12. What is his/her bowel habit like? Any problems? Any odours, strange colours or stool shapes?

He is regular (usually goes in afternoon/evening) but takes quite a while to go. He takes a book or toys with him and usually takes about 10 minutes to go. He says that sometimes he struggles to go. Quite a strong smell.

13. Where does he/she sweat? Does it have a smell or does it stain a particular colour?

Gets very red and sweaty when exercising (usual exercise is football and he really likes to exert himself). He also often sweats in the bed at night, it’s quite common to see beads of sweat over his face. The sweat has a sweet smell about it. Also he says he sweats when the teacher tells him off.

14. History of illnesses in his/her life?

Chicken pox, influenza, pleurisy, and usual colds and stomach upsets.

15. Has he/she reacted to any vaccines or medical drugs?

We decided not to vaccinate. Has not reacted to any medical drugs given.

16. Problems with sleep? Position he/she sleeps in? Nightmares or any dreams he/she talks about?

Often has nightmares (e.g. scary dinosaurs eating him and family members). Also nightmares connected to the abuse mentioned above. For instance, a man coming in the bathroom while he’s on the toilet and doing that tickling thing. Also, after doing the video interview for the police he was worried that the parent might see it and get angry with him, and he gets scared that the parent’s face might pop up at his window. It is horrendous to see your child be that scared and terrified.

17. How is he/she with animals?

A little fearful of dogs (a small dog ran at him barking when he was a toddler and scared him). Also scared of horses, that they might kick him. In general he likes animals. We have 2 cats who he loves. It is possible that the fur has aggravated the sniff, so the cats are not allowed in his bedroom anymore.

18. How is he/she with adults or strangers?

Usually very friendly but now much more cautious

* 19. What is the family history of illness and disease?

On my side of the family there is history of age onset diabetes, also high blood pressure. My Dad had a heart problem. Also problems with anxiety and depression.

20. What was the pregnancy like? Any odd symptoms or feelings that disappeared once he/she was born?

I cannot think of anything.

Hi again,

please ignore the asterisk before question 19

Hi,

I would be very grateful if someone could suggest a remedy that my son could try.

I was wondering if perhaps my response was too long (as you can imagine, recent events have been quite traumatic and seems I had a lot to get off my chest about it). But if someone is willing to quickly scan through my response to the questions and recommend a remedy I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you.

Kind Regards,

Florinda

Hi Erica,

how kind and thoughtful of you to respond to my post. Yes it was a bit confusing when no one replied. I must admit I did feel a bit foolish, as I thought the reason no one responded might be due to the fact that I gave way too much information and probably made it rather daunting to reply to! Also I do understand something may well have come up for the homeopath (the one who asked the questions).

There is unfortunately still a lot of stress around from the event mentioned in my post, although thankfully that stress isn't so much with my son but with me. Have personally found it very hard to move on from it, especially since the police investigation did not find enough evidence to take it further. Additionally there has been some incredibly hurtful gossip by a few in my local community. It really shocks me how cruel people can be.

My son is doing much better in general now, except strangely enough he is still having problems with the 'sniff'. It comes and goes, and he has it quite badly at the moment. I wonder if allergies are a problem, but it's strange how it all started around the time he disclosed about the abuse.

Thank you so much for your thoughtful and sensitive reply Erica, it's very touching.

Kind Regards,

Florinda

Hi Erica,

thank you so much for your helpful response.

My son's sniff still is a problem. It comes and goes and is quite bad at the moment. I will take your advice and give him 2x30c of ignatia. I would also like to give it a go. How much would you advise for an adult dose?

Thank you again for your helpful and compassionate response.

With gratitude,

Florinda

Hi Erica,

should that dose be taken daily for a few weeks, or did you mean take a one off dose and see how things go after a few weeks?

Many, many thanks for your help,

Florinda

Hi Erica,

many thanks. We will both have the remedy this weekend.

Please accept my deep gratitude for caring enough to take the time to consider my situation. It is greatly appreciated!

Sincere and kindest regards,

Florinda