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practioner Brisbane


[message deleted by starface on Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:14:20 GMT]
 
  starface on 2011-10-30
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Why are you taking Staphysagria?
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade

[message deleted by starface on Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:14:40 GMT]
 
starface last decade
I sent an email to your email address. Please read it.



Approval
=======

I like getting constant approval. It makes me feel liked, wanted/desired. I can just relax and feel safe. If I am not getting it or if I got it once but then it isnt constantly forthcoming it makes me unstable, worried and I feel like I need to do something to get it again, otherwise I feel “nothing” empty? unstable? alone?.. It feels like people walking away from me or not looking at me. In this world you might meet someone you like and you befriend each other. But the next day you might meet someone else or forget about the other friend from the day before you met. Or he does not interest you anymore. So in my view “doing nothing” makes people at high risk of leaving you or forget about you. A horrible thing.

Approval or a nice comment or compliment about my appearance or personality goes a long long way and it was desperately needed for the past few years but I did not get it. It is like the best thing. It reassures me that I still “got it” and do not need to worry about anything. It is calming in terms of worry but also it feels very very nice since it means the person likes something about me which will make her want to be with me.


Attention
=======

Attention and approval are the same. I need it constantly to feel good in company. Otherwise I get depressed and feel I am not wanted. That people dont care about me anymore. For example on an online forum. I come on it, I post a few posts, a homeopath takes me on, we say a few things and than I dont hear from him for a few days. This makes me than very unstable mentally. And get a bit “hysteric” or whatever the right word would be. I become this unstable person and do not feel good at all. Like that I am not getting something I desperately want. It isnt a nice feeling but this sort of drives the theatrical “Me” than. And when I am in such state I cannot ever get enough. I stay unstable. Often in such state I will do anything to get attention positive or negative attention. As long as it is attention. But I am still greatly afraid of the criticism or negativity. This I am mostly talking out of my head. I only think the reason I do what I do is to get attention. I do not feel like “oh lets get me some attention” when I want it. I always rationalize, or am in denial about my own motives when I am “unstable”. I am just an observant person. Read a lot of self help in an attempt to get over my anxities. So I am aware more of my behaviors that is all.

But unlike most other people who are like that. I feel pain from criticism, worthless and horrible about myself quick.


A great personality & appearance
==========================

Those are 2 golden things. People will always be interested, want you if that is sorted.


Maturity
======

I am aware of many traits that might seem childlike in me and it makes me feel bad. It is a reason why people could reject me I guess. An immature person can get rejected. Maturity is something I wished I would have to feel safe. I am often also lost or like an actor, wanting to be what I think people would want me to be. So that my likelihood to be wanted accepted, liked, desired are increased. I often feel depressed and perceive the lack in me when I become aware of the purpose behind some of my behaviors as for example just mentioned in my last sentence... which is that I do what I do to feel like people will want me. It is very depressing.


Teen life
=======

This is hard. I just want to be around people. Experience life. Experience life with a girlfriend as a teen. But this has passed me by. I picture myself be a teen and have a girl, spend all my time with her and nothing else matters. Sometimes on TV in music videos on or in tv shows this is portrayed and it hurts me when I see that I dont have this and never will. It is what I crave.


Going back to society
=================

This is so difficult. I did not have any life experiences for the past few years. I am supposed to act like a 24 year old and I doubt I can do this. I certainly cannot. Since how could I grow without life experiences? You just cannot. It makes me worried that I will be rejected, not accepted I guess? But on the other hand on days when I feel good I think it just adds to my uniqueness since I am not like the typical guy and I like to be young and am definitely more emotional.

I feel totally lost, empty. blank about where do I fit in society etc if I were to go back to it after being away for so many years and I do not know if I could cope or deal with it. How people would respond to me? I dont know. I am afraid about lots of things and mostly to be not accepted or isolated, rejected. I dont want to walk around people in a workplace for example without being able to make contact and friends. It would hurt a lot and I could not bear it. Life would be meaningless.

I feel acute panic when I am confronted by my parents to go back to society like to school etc. I have such difficulty communicating with strangers, people outside my family. I speak unclearly from the anxiety, I sometimes swallow words at the end of a sentence, my voice trembles. My thoughts get mixed up and I say something very uninteresting, not great stuff. Communication is so important but I completely lost it. I suck at it. I am so afraid whenever I have to speak. I fear the same thing happening over and over again. That I will get the feeling that the person isnt on my wave length or does not understand me. I feel so hurt by it. I cannot live with the feeling this leaves me when I get the feeling that the communication instead of connecting us rather made me feel isolated, considered weird by the other person,or strange, or difficult to talk to. You cannot imagine how horrible, lost and alone I feel. I would feel horrible if I had to go to a university and have to talk with receptionists, get career advice and all this stuff. I simply would not be able to do it. I know I would mess up. I would get the painful reactions from people I talked to and than I could not bare going to university anymore after this happened as it would make me feel to bad seeing the people there together while I am alone and unable to make solid contact. In highschool it was quite painful but my defense strategy was to distance myself from people. Avoid every attempt of communication, from people trying to befriend me etc. So that I was alone. It hurt on one hand but on the other hand it was needed and I sort of numbed myself out with my ego, I was at times afraid of what people think of me but it was needed. No other option. Risking communication with people was to risky. People might find out that I am nothing once they talk to me. As long as I didnt talk I got at least complimented and attention, people wanted me. They had interest in me but I at no cost could talk to them otherwise they would see that I am nothing and walk away. I had a few selected friends who were international exchange students. For some reason I could not befriend and felt a slight aversion to the native people of this country I live in. I didnt like the idea of befriending them. International students was better.


Love is vulnerability, but dont want it to be that way
=========================================

love is a GREAT vulnerability. Weakness. I am too immature to show love around my family. There is no love shown in my family anyway. I guess my parents are immature too. I hate the family I am in because of this problem with love. Because of my parents I have this problem now. And it is a humiliating one. Hugging friends or giving handshakes are things I am always uncomfortable with, out of fear that someone will have something negative to say by seeing that I am uncomfortable or unsure. I am not comfortable with closeness. Not with relationships with a girl. I never had a girlfriend in school because my older brother went to the same school so I was afraid of him seeing me with a girl. Only once when he was sick and did not go to school did I have a relationship for a few days. This problem with love causes tremendous worry about my future and I want to overcome it but I dont see a way as to how. I dont want to miss out on love, on the experiences because I have a problem with it. At home just watching a singing competition with girls in it brings on uncomfortableness and fear that my parents will say something that will humiliate or ridicule me. THey always do this when it comes to girls. It is immature, and damaging to me. They surely do not want me to ever have a girlfriend otherwise they would not do this to me always. How can they expect me to have a girl when they always ridicule or make me uncomfortable when the theme comes up. So I often desire to say something back to make them see I dont care when they try to ridicule me, which I know in advance would make them afraid or worried. Since it would make me independent of their opinion, as if I dont care about what they have to say anymore, which would be a danger to them... but this would bring back the vulnerability in the first place of admitting to wanting love.
How will I ever have a girlfriend in front of my parents, a wedding, be open about love at my home? I never will and it is horrible. It must be fixed, solved. But I simply dont know how.


Humiliation
=========

Oh humiliation. This is horrible. Noone must ever see that I feel humiliated. It is so repulsive and off putting seeing someone who is feeling humiliated. I cannot stand it. I cannot even say the word humiliation or shame in person to anyone face to face. Impossible as I feel a reaction + anxiety instantly. I often see people say I am ashamed, I felt embarrassed etc. I am the type of person who could not do this ever (say that I felt ashamed or embarassed for something). And I believe the reason is ridicule. I feel like you will get ridiculed than. It is a vulnerable spot. There is just something that feels really bad about those type of things. Saying spontaneously that I felt humiliated, ashamed or embarassed is considered not good. It feels like I should never feel that way. There is pressure on me to not feel that way ever. Looking humiliated is really bad. A loss of position

I must never feel humiliated. People must never see it. It is danger for ridicule but also pride. I feel so horrible, small, scum when I feel humiliated. It is so ugly. WHo wants a person who feels humiliated? Noone. If I see on the TV someone feeling humiliated or having trouble on stage with nerves I have to switch the channel. Also getting humiliated once makes you loose position, status. All is lost if I get humiliated and I dont exist anymore. I have been robbed of expensive clothes, of jewelry. Noone will want me anymore, look at me. I became irrelevant. I got the biggest ailment of humiliation in the materia medica for sure!


Ridicule
=======

Ridicule is horrible. I can defend myself if I have social contact with people but when I am alone I have 0 confidence. Or when I have a friend circle and feel rather uncertain about whether I am really liked or not. Whether the friend circle is stable, which would mean I am the center of attention and everyone really likes me. So if I am not really getting the feeling that people want me and I get an attempt of ridicule it makes me feel horrible, and there is nothing I can do about it. I fear all friends will side with the one who ridiculed me. Or I fear they will laugh with him about me. There is lots of fear of people ridiculing me and me being unable to defend myself. I fear they will see that I am unconfident, that I feel humiliated, red in my face. I have to have solid relationships, friends. Know that I am wanted, desired in order to be confident. I must know how people will react to whatever I say. I must know in advance their reactions also. Robbing me of confidence is easiest by people rejecting me, walking away from me. It installs self doubt and my confidence goes down instantly. How could I be confident if people rejected me, walked away from me? Impossible! it must mean I wasnt fun or interesting enough. THat something was missing and it makes me doubt, loose confidence. It is horrible. And that is pretty much what robbed me of my confidence in my life. The reactions of people started becoming different to me compared to before. People reject me, dont like me anymore. It is so difficult to deal with this. I get so uncertain and wish to get answers about what I did wrong, not good enough etc so I could improve. I am in a horrible place right now. Totally uncertain about how people will react to me so I stay quiet, boring, in the background which just causes pain because if I am like that the inevitable will happen which is that people will get tired of my boringness and leave me. A vicious cylce! What I fear happens anyway by staying quiet, closed, reserved. But I am not going to open up.


Unable to connect – different
=======================

I used to want company really bad. Just walking at night and seeing girls and noticing that I cannot be with them caused great pain. Really heavy. But it was a sort of overemotionally. Superficial... the need for company. Maybe just to get noticed, approval, contact, attention. Also if the girls would come up to me I would distance myself from them quick anyway out of fear.

Well there is a conflict I superficially want company, spend time with girls. But there is an aversion also when I get close. When I start thinking of socializing with them. I feel like I am so different. I just dont want to talk with them. We have nothing in common. How am I going to talk to her and find the same interests? Those type of people are interested in things I am not interested. I just cannot befriend anyone therefore. I dont want to be involved in their common crap. of going to gyms, to parties, be interested in cars etc.

I dont understand this aversion, since deep down I know I want to be with those people and do things with them. Something changed over the last few years.

I was a very picky person before. And when I came to this new country I hated everything about it. I would just talk bad and how ugly everything is. Also behaviors of my brother annoyed me so much. Like when I noticed that he “copied” someone elses behaviors or words from a friend of ours total repulsion. Or when we watched TV and he laughed at something that I knew wasnt even funny. It all irritated me so much. I am still like that in many ways but over the years I am feeling more ok in this new country.

There is a bit of conflict in me. On one hand I want people and with the above mentioned behavior I am distancing myself from them and making people not like me... so the attention, company I can forget by such behavior which I later always regret, but on the other hand I often feel like distancing myself and dont want to be with people.


Work – impossible
===============

Ah work. Since I took a dose of platina Work/carrer came into my vision. Before platina I never worried about this subject, because it wasnt even on my mind. My problems only were of my appearance and trying to fix that. But now work/career matters more and it became a new worrying topic. Another impossible thing that will not work out. Now all of a sudden I am seeing how in a bad spot I am. I am 24, no education. Even if I go to uni I will only have an education by age 27 or 28. I am so behind everyone. And this worries me. I will be invisible. I should be the one who stands out or is at the forefront. It is like my BDD has gone since platina from being a big worry to being less, but now career and work are a worry too. It is impossible how I will ever be in the position I need to be. A postition that fits me. I will not be in it for many many years if I decide to do something today. And I dont like this at all. It is depressing and makes me not want to start anything.It doesnt fit my “reality” at all of how things should be.

Also I have no idea what I would like as a career. I just see problems everywhere. If I were a lawyer. I would not be happy because I would have to be the judge. Not some lawyer who talks up to a judge. But being at the top doesnt feel good at all either and I would not want it.. lonely. SO the conflict again. Also being such high position as a judge seems IMPOSSIBLE. And on the other hand it seems like a ridicoulous idea anyway since I have social anxiety and am lacking in many ways from spending lots of my life in a house doing nothing.

I also have problems with having ordinary jobs, like an IT guy, or the student part time jobs of in a shop etc. It makes me feel horrible when I think of working in such places and afraid. I feel like I am in this small spot (the workplace) where noone even knows I exist. It is sort of a claustrophobic response of suffocating or feeling trapped in such small workplaces. I just need to get out and on a bigger stage to be seen by many more people. Ideally I would work somewhere where I am in the public eye. This sort of lets me breath and makes me seen. But working in the public eye? with my problems? I cannot even go out the house without getting anxious. SO I dont know where those ideas are coming from. I do have a bit of difficulty, lots of difficulty if you can see. My goals, my standards, everything is so high.. but look at me, I have social anxiety, BDD, lots of problems, already 24 and I am nowhere good, advanced, the person that has it all and everyone looks at. It causes suffering the high ambition and the utterly small me.

Work is like the next BDD problem. I thought my appearance, face needs to be great looking and all will be fine. People will come to me. But working in a hidden spot or rather a place that isnt big, known, etc will make noone see me either. I would want work in showbiz on the TV. Just somewhere were the media is.
Work is a depressing topic.


Victim
=====

I feel horrible when people treat me badly. Especially more than one person. When they sort of gang up on me. The reason is it makes me feel isolated or alone. People not caring about me anymore. They just walked away. I take great offense because this should never happen. My intention most often is to entertain or be annoyingly funny etc, and so it turning into people criticizing me and making me feel alone. And make me worry about how I am being perceived is just so unjustified and wrong. This should never happen. People who do this to me deserve to be critizised back by me. I feel those type of people are just hating on me and want to ruin me. Make me gone because they are jealous or something. I feel great unjust in that. I am nice and friendly, sometimes I do bad things but they are never evil things, or malicious or out of hate so it is unjust. Even more so because people starting to critizise me leaves me feeling horrible. It robs me of my confidence. It makes me uncertain. It ruins me. Since people is what I need. Their approval, them laughing at my jokes, them liking and praising me etc. People criticising and rejecting me is the worst someone can do to me. It really ruins me. I cannot function when I am uncertain about how people will react to me, to what I say. When I am unsure of that, I feel horrible, depressed. I feel the best when I know “that I got it” which I only get the feel for based on peoples reactions to the things I say. I can feel terribly self conscious saying a joke to someone with worry whether he will get the joke or not. I am totally blank and uncertain. This type of unexpected reactions by people made me loose so much confidence and it made me uncertain. If there is one thing I would need to feel ok again socially is to know in advance that peoples reactions will be as expected to the things I say to them and that I still got it and not those traumatic events when people critizise, reject me


Appearance
==========

Appearance is the foundation or most important building block. Without it all is doomed. Appearance is everything. Based on appearance people form an opinion about your position, rank. I mean appearance is like a new shiny good looking car that resembles class. If you got a bad appearance. ANd I mean with that just a nose that is to wide instead of thin and refined it resembles anything else but the “classy” shiny new good looking car. If my appearance is bad I am like an old car. A horrible thing. Who would ever look at me or want to be with me? I just dont get it. So I rather have a great appearance and drive an old car than have it the other way around. I can always acquire a new car later. And beside being materialistic is not a good thing anyway. Appearance is the building block, foundation as I said. It has to be great otherwise all is doomed. Life pointless. You cannot make up for it in other areas. Impossible. Imagine an ugly princess. That just doesnt go together.


Being controlled
=============

I have a problem with my ego when I am controlled. I simply dont like it and it makes me look bad. Maybe I have insecurities around it. In a workplace I would have to get controlled. So I would fear how this makes me look and feel the need to stand up but I would be afraid of it. Out of what might happen. How I will get treated.


Superiority
=========

I am often afraid to be acting superior. I mean sometimes I have the urge to say some things that make me look that way but I hold back out of fear as I do not want people to walk away from me. Which superiority does. Who wants to be with someone who is up themselves? Noone. But when I am sort of diminished or attacked by someone I always act superior. It is just the way it is. Cannot help it. Superiority is my defense mechanism. Most often only when I get diminished, critizised etc. Otherwise I do not act this way because people do not like it. Dont want to be unbearable etc. which would make people walk away from me.


Parents
======

Not much of an emotional relationship with my father at all. I get defensive quick when he says something critical, negative to me. And if I respond it always feels intense. My heart pounding like crazy, I feel “shaky. Uncertain etc. I mentioned a few examples in my first post.

My mother I do have a much better relationship. BUt still there are so many things I cannot talk with her about. I never share any of my problems with them. They dont know about my BDD or anything. I feel anxiety when I see them coming close to the bathroom while I look in the mirror and would deny everything.

I hate the family environment, the problem with showing love in my family. It is a problem. Which means I will have problems with girls, with showing love, with giving hugs, showing that I like someone. It is a humiliating problem. I wished I would not have this problem.


Wanting to mix with people, but I cant
=============================

Sometimes I walk past schools and see people playing on playgrounds and I feel like how good it would be if I could join them in and have fun with people. But than the reasons why I cannot come up. And it has to do with pride, ego? I can not put myself in a situation where I would not look good. I would be uncertain. I fear I sometimes would not know how to act, how to deal with things if they would not talk to me constantly etc. And the worst of all the possible worst things is this: THat I meet some people. We get to know each other, talk a bit, play a bit and than they loose interest in me. It is so horribly depressing. When I feel alone there in a group of people. I cannot start any conversation anymore from the bad feelings. I just stand there alone and cannot do anything. Not leave, not do anything. And I am scared of getting ridiculed why I am quiet or told things like that. I never want to be in a situation where people tell me why I am so quiet? or when I feel left out? This is the WORST. I am greatly afraid of this happening, that I will be just like a dog walking behind people and noone will talk to me. I cannot deal with such situations. Please save me from this. And the idea of being a dog is repulsive as.


Creativity
=======

I dont know whether I am a creative person or not. I think I am more an intellectual thinker. But creative arts is something that interests me. Something I would want to be part of, or work in. But it is new to me so I feel lost. I havent been into such things before. Creativity is something that people like in people. The work is always new and fresh, exciting. Never the boring same old. But I fear that “I dont have it”. You either got it or not. Being somewhere in the middle isnt for me. What I do I must be really good at otherwise I will be depressed. Being middle of the class or at the bottom does not make you stand out. So I am reluctant to get into the creative arts field since it is unknown to me. But it feels exciting and right to me. I fear that I will be like a complete idiot standing there and do horrible. THat my mind will fail me and I will not be able to come up with ideas etc. I could not just jump into creative arts without ever having been involved with arts to see myself whether I can produce results, good work first in that field to not get humiliated and feel awful in that class. Invisible and wishing I could dissapear without anyone noticing.


Competition
==========

Competition doesnt seem like a strong word to me. Competition sounds like you are competing for something. That you dont have it yet. Competition sounds low and I would therefore never get involved in competition. I laugh when I see reality tv shows ala bachelor etc. How a group of guys competes for a girl. I would never do it. Even if you win, you are still low lol for wanting to compete in the first place.

In the past I did poorly in competitions always. I couldnt deal with people looking at me while I perform. Like I remember I was a good basketball player. One of the best in my team, but one day we had some try outs and some players who were older from other teams were watching and I did poorly. I was last. I couldnt hit a basket because depression came in and the bad feelings. I felt like wanting to disappear from the earth and hit that damn basket for once so I can disappear. I was around 10 or 11 years old back than when this happened.

I am maybe a bit competive around girls. or used to be which meant that if a girl flirted with some other guy I liked I would feel really depressed and not talk to anyone for that day. Or once when I liked a girl I gave her my phone but than I saw she is together with another guy and I was so angry, even though we were just friends, but we sort of had a thing going I felt hugely betrayed. I told her to give me my phone back and didnt speak to her again for a few days. Than later it was ok again. Even though I found her sexually very attractive and always got aroused so quick in her presence. It was never the same again to my surprise. I did not really want her anymore ever again.
I dont know whether this is competition or not. Competition sort of repulses me right now. Fights or battles seem better words. Competition sounds like you are equal and compete for something with other people. I have a great problem with being equal as the next guy to me. I am invincible than. Dont like that. Fights, battles are better words that rather excite my ego. Because it is just me than fighting or battling something. I am not being compared to someone or fighting out for a prize or whatever with someone.


Comparison
==========

comparison with others seems more relevant. I think I do it when I feel bad. The problem is I will not get what I want but left on my own if I am not a specific good way.


Sex
===

I always had a high sex drive. Back before my social anxiety I used to be around girls always. I got aroused so quick and had some embarrassing situations. I always got lots of interest from girls, but despite that I never had much fun with girls as in never some real long lasting “good times” with them. Only once some short “making out”. Sexual arousal are like powerful feelings and for some reason it felt to me that I will never get lucky and have fun with a girl. That it will never happen for some reason. It would be to good to be true. I would be in heaven. So it probably never happened because of this thoughts that it would be to good.

Sex in itself is a turn off for me. Being naked, something doesnt feel good about it. and it seems like a disgusting thing or something like that. I dont get turned on anymore once the female looses his clothes. But I have some fetishes therefore. If I had sex it would have to be with the woman wearing some nice tight clothes I find a turn on

I used to do some sexual self seeking before often. Also when I was around 7 or 8 but I started masturbating around age 12 or 13. And I have done it pretty much daily since than. Maybe I didnt do it for 2 days consecutively the most on rare occasions.


Haughtiness
==========

I am haughty just internally or over the internet at times in order to protect myself. But not openly. Why would I want to be that way since it makes people leave you, walk away

Saying NO
=========

I have trouble saying NO to my father often when he comes by nicely and tells me to do a stupid time consuming task, or to strangers usually. Which I hate. I feel like I must be able to do say No whenever I feel like saying it, but I cant. I worry that people are or will take advantage of me and that it is making me look bad. With my father I fear that he will keep telling me every day to do stupid time consuming tasks so that I need to stand up and say that I dont want to do it. I might get taken advantage off and start looking like a pushover. But I fear the abuse, criticism I might get my way. And the guilt feelings. When I say no to my mother it is never a big issue. We often come to an agreement later. But my father he acts as if the world just ended. So do I want to get into conflict or rather do the task i the question. Being in conflict with my father makes me feel unsafe, and I hate the disharmony at home than. Since he always makes such a fuss than and talks for hours bad about me to my mother. I have this instability at home than. It doesnt feel goo. So I have a problem. He treats me really bad. Or it is my perception of it. I am confused now whether I am the spoiled child or whether my father is like a devil and they are the bad ones. I dont know it. I would think my parents are the bad ones. But not sure anymore from how I get treated on some forums. If I am the bad guy I would want to know, to change as I would feel uncertain and in fear of being rejected. I would need to change. Certainty and seeing things accurately is therefore important


Someone could like me?
===================

When I am theatrical or so I feel like girls, people can like me. But if a girl chose me and wanted to be with me. I would feel worthless and so bad. Not able to believe that a girl could really like me. Which goes above to the themes of approval and attention as I described. That superficially I act sometimes charming, seductive, over emotional, etc but deep down I feel noone could really like me


Worthlessness
============

I can feel really worthless on some days but it alternates with feeling really good about myself on other days.


Life meaningless, just work
=====================

Sometimes when I read a book. Like right now I am reading an autobiography of a famous person. And he talks about the times when he used to work at places like a small computer company etc. Or about his father how he worked some small jobs. And something about this seems so depressing and horrible to me. A bad sensation. As if life is just about working, being trapped in some workplaces and being invisible, not being able to get out of this, not able to do what you want to do. What you need to do.Be where you need to be.

I have those werid ideas when I am at home, but when I get out of my house I feel depressed, anxious. None of those high ambitions. As it seems impossible anyway. It leaves me being depressed. I really dont understand this since I am nothing. Me having a high position or in the public eye? It will never happen. I am shy. But it kind of goes with my reality. Being admired by groups of people.

I have images of being in a city and looking up while feeling I am invisible. I feel like I should stand out but I dont in terms of career/work.


Big world, small me
===============

The world is big and I am small. As I described above this sometimes I have pictures in my mind looking up sky crapers in a city with the horrible sensations that make me feel like I need to do something, but I cant do anything about it. It feels impossible so this force, opression stays.


Self-reproach/criticalness
====================

I reproach myself often for all kinds of things. At other times I praise myself and blow my own horn. I could talk about how I feel like when I walk outside. That when I see a group of girls I know they are looking at me and thinking good things about me. THat I feel like a celebrity who must get away from the crowds lol. But then when I say such things the depressing thoughts come immediately because I can imagine what you might be thinking when I say such things ie. That I am delusional, or the worst of all... “how small and empty I must be feeling to be like this”. Such thoughts from other people ruin me. I cannot function. I am to much focused on such stuff. Whenever I say things like that, I always have such depressing thoughts of what people might be thinking of me now. I am to self aware, observant and possess to much knowledge of “depressive” nature for my own good. It is sabotaging, or I am my worst enemy. I feel so horrible when people have such thoughts about me that it is always in the back of my mind I guess.

Or when I want approval for my appearance or stuff like that. I get negative thoughts. About how I just want approval and thats it. Theres something negative about this again. THat there is nothing to me except my appearance. THat I must feel very “empty” on the inside. I guess I FEAR a lot of people having the knowledge I have so I fear they might see the emptiness, the purpose behind my behaviors. It would be devastating for me. So depressing. I would not be able to ever pick myself up and feel good again.
 
starface last decade
This is most likely Vitamin X/Platina/HomoeopathLeftMe. I know this case well enough now to recognize it.

Because of this I will not be getting involved.
[message edited by brisbanehomoeopath on Sun, 30 Oct 2011 22:54:11 GMT]
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade

[message deleted by starface on Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:16:03 GMT]
 
starface last decade

[message deleted by starface on Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:23:45 GMT]
 
starface last decade

[message deleted by starface on Fri, 06 Jan 2012 10:23:41 GMT]
 
starface last decade
This is the same subterfuge, the same deceitful behaviour that has made it impossible to help you.

I am continually disappointed but I cannot say I am suprised. Because only the truth will help a practitoner prescribe, you will never get that help from me because I will always recognise your story. STOP sending emails to my personal email address.

Again it shows how superficial Platina and all the other remedies have been, as you keep acting in this unhealthy way. You simply cannot get yourself out of it, keep bashing away in the same broken fashion. But of course you are going to keep taking high potencies and wrong remedies like usual so there is no point in bothering to warn you again.

Good luck, because you are going to need it when the big crash comes.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade
I am nearly 50 years old. My hair is thinning quite naturally and is not concerning me. Of course you just see your own insecurities.

You might want to ask yourself 'Does he look almost 50' and then re-evaulate your opinion of how homoeopathy has helped me over the years.

The male relatives on my mother's side all had male pattern baldness, and were all mostly bald long before my age. I am happy that I have maintained as much hair as I have.

Any other aspersions you want to cast on homoeopathy using me as an example?
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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starface last decade

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