Depression, isolation from the people, headache, memory loss

Kadwa, thank you very much.
Before I have taken another homeopatic pills. If I should wait some time before taking Calcarea Carbonica?

ok. thanks.

Hello, Kadwa,
I report because 14 days passed of the Calcarea Carbonica use.
On the first day after two doses I could not sleep a half of night, and the third day all day I was bleeding from the anus. For so long has not ever bled. No further deterioration of the felt. Still do not feel an improvement, too. Except today I feel pain at right knee. It`s strange.
During this period, I split up with my common-law husband. I find it difficult and sad, I cry a lot.
Concentration of attention disorder, I could not work from October 2010 to October 2011. From 2011 October to December I worked a little, and from 2012 I started working 4 hours a day as an accountant again.
I started attending the gym.
I want to be with people and maintain good relationships with them. However, I am afraid of people. Still have thoughts that they can do something wrong with me. For example, to cheat me. They can spread about me bad things and I suffer from it. They may think wrong things of me and I will be very sad. I am a perfectionist and I try to do everything well. I try to be good and true to people. However, sometimes I'm angry. I think I`m angry because I`m afraid.
Now I split with my second husband. My fear also dit it`s job...
I can not make friends with people who I like very much because I feel that they don`t need me. I am very afraid to be left out. I'm friends with men who are not at all like me, and I have a feeling that they tolerate my weaknesses because I tolerate their shortcomings. But it takes a little while.
My free time is sad. There is a lot of things I can not do because I find it hard to keep in touch with people. I feel redundant.
I understand that I am beautiful and intelligent (I hear those compliments) but it seems to me that people will find me still defective and will not want to be with me.
I do not like to be alone, I miss the people. I feel depressed.
Life has no longer at yourself any goals, I see no point in living. I live only for my son.
Previously, I attended gym, I lattended latino dancing. But not for long time because I feel again as people hate me. It seems to me that no one loves me. Though my son, parents and friends say they love very much. I can`t bedieve this.
I do not trust people.
I think a lot of conflicts with people that have taken place recently or long ago. In my mind many times I think what we said, what could I say. In my mind I continue the conflict, I want them to win. Or I thing a lot what I did wrong and what I could do otherwise.
I am afraid to be humiliated. I afraid to be spurned as many times I was...
I am disappointed with my life.

I still feel ringing in the ears. Aches forehead, left temple. Someone moving from the inside of the left eye and left nostril. Increased pain on the left side of the head above the nape of the neck.
Breathing is shallow, short. I cannot do deep breath of air, do not do full yawn. Pressure on the heart.
Dry lips.
Flatulence.
I want to be warm. In the morning I do not want to get out of bed. In total I do not want to move.
I want to eat meat and fish. I like coffe with milk.
I have financial difficulties and can not eat what I want or go where I want.
I'm afraid to live .
I am thinking that my life will be long suffering until death, it will be even worse and worse.
Thank you again for your help.
One thing I like is to help the unfortunate and ill people. Could you advise me what possibilities are to become a homeopathist.
Best regards,
She

I forgot to tell, that I 2010 October used a lot of sedatives at hospital (I lost job and I was very sleepless and worried). When I stopped using sedatives I lost memory at all, I even could not organize my life at all.
But before using these alopatic drugs I also had problems with concentration when I was stressed. I was stressed because I lost job rather few times when economic crisis started. I live only with my son so I`m responsible to pay dues and I cannot get help from anywhere.
Next, as I sayd before, I am alone, I can`t make permanent relationships so I am stressed because of this too...
I lived with my parents in a steading far from other people untill I was 6 years old. Then we moved to a willage. I had no expierence how to communicate so I failed often. My father beat my mother it was awfull. My father didn`t love me and my brother, too. I was alone and I couldn`t plain to anybody. Here wasn`t anybody who could hear me. So I felt unsafe even when I was a child.

Hello, Kadwa,
I report because 14 days passed of the Lycopodium use.

I have no interests. I spend a lot of time in my minds. I`m not interested in the outside world. I almost don`t watch TV.
I lack of motivation. I`m very lazy. I`m defiant to authority, I diminish them. I`m passive.
Lack of energy, lach of behavioral intentionality, lack of purpose. I can not decide.
I am a shy and secretive, socially distanced myself. Since I have no interest, I do not know what to talk when I meet people. But solitude depressing me, I`m longing for contacts.
I only taking care of my health and I want very much to feel better.
I take care of my Sons, my Moters and my friens healthiness.
Headaches - the temples, forehead. More pain in left side of the head. On the left side of the head sometimes I feel a deep stabbing pain.
Solid neck, it cracks and crepitate when I turn or bend mu head. It is hard to turn my neck, he is as wooden or as filled with something.
It hurts my back at the waist and at the sacrum. Spine at the waist by a hernia. I have a few outgrowthes by the spine. Spine is also cracking when I move it.
Hands and feet crack, crepitate when I move them.
The entire body is stiff and inflexible.
Myopia. Before my eyes I see like a small black fly flying, black spots trouble to see good.
Tinnitus, roaring in the ears.
Shallow breathing. If long-lasting tension and stress, the heart begins to push , palpitations, breathing difficulties.
After the stress is often need to go to urinate at night . Urine is drained a little, but I can not lie, because it is so irritating to the bladder.

I feel as all persons are not worthy, beneath.

I think I have negative symphtoms of schizophrenia.

I forgot to report about Lycopodium. The 3rd day after I started treatment I felt a great misanthropy, I realy hated all people and averything in this Earth.
No more symphtoms from Lycopodium.

Dear dr. Mahfooz, thank you for your recommendation.
The matter is, I feel more than nervous exhaustion, irritability, sadness.
I want medicines what affect to my personality and to heal from the mental trauma a long time ago I suffered. I was suffering the whole my life.
Keywords are: trust issued, the inability to create intimacy.
I love my son very much , but I feel some kind of anxiety with him, too. My depression became more pronounced after my child was born. I did not know how to be a mom. What it means to be a mother. I did not know how to care for, love, how to raise my son.
I grew up with both parents and a Brother. Grandparents lived nearby. But I had no one with whom I have a close relationship. I did not have anyone to open up my heart, I did not have anyone to tell my thoughts and dreams.
My father hated my mother very much and also he hated me and my brother. I've heard a lot of contempt father's words. He beat my mother.
Mom was suffering. I do not know why she did not split with him.Sometimes she said that she lived with my father because there children, my Brother and me. So I felt as if I am guilty that my mother is suffering. If the mother was so much suffering for me, I do not have the right to be happy.
My brother was born first, then my mother was pregnant but got an abortion because she
did not want to raise another child with our father.
I was the third. Parental relationship was poor, being pregnant my
mother suffered a lot and cried. I believe that I have as a mother'swomb, I did not want to come into this world.
Yet I have thought that the father sexually abused me when I was 4 or 5 years. But I'm not 100% convinced that this is true. I do not want to know the truth because it
may be too difficult to live with
this reality.
I remember when I was
abused by my father he
said that I have to say
nothing to my mother because my mother is mad at me. Then
I felt that I did something very bad and I can not get the exemption
because it is forbidden to talk about it.
I live in families where there were a large number of negatyve
emotions. Joy has been almost completely.
Father is sharply critical of the mother, as well as brother and me.
I felt unsafe.
When I was 13-14 years old my father had suspected me
paranoid that I had a promiscuous sexual life. But I did not and I have been very painful to listen to. No one interceded for me, my mother was weak and weird. Father and
his friends said that I am a
harlot, bitch.
When I was 16 I had a boyfriend, but after half a year, he left me. It
was a big trauma for me.
17 years old I started lax sexual life. It was the only
way for me to get attention, warmth, because I could not have spiritual
intimacy, which I really needed.
I fell in love to
my sex partners.
I got married 22 years out of love. I loved because I felt that the man took care of me. I really need someone to take care of me.
It was difficult to maintain a long and close relationship we divorced.
Then again, I supported sexual relationships with men at random.
I rarely had a steady lover.
I told all this in order to clarify and emphasize as I lacked a close
relationship, and how desperate I was looking for it in any way.
This is the basis for my sickness - distrust and longing.
I now 37 years old.
I stopped maintaining casual sexual contacts about 7 years ago. I
realized that it can not continue longer.
I realized that I needed to create a real
intimate relationship.
Since that time I lost the source who gave me pleasure and inspiration.
I feel guilty about that way I acted. I want to hide from the
people my story.
At the same time I took myself out of the 'drug' namely the sex.
It seems to me that I will never have a good man. I feel I am not worthy
of a good man. In addition, there are very few good men.
Maybe that's why I lost the meaning of life.
I always did everything that I would loved by someone. I cook,
sew, knit, grow flowers. I studied in college and university. I did a career. I took care of my appearance. I did my
beautiful house.
And when I can achieve my goal to be loved I do not want to do anything more. Life seems to me expired.
In spite of my mistakes I am very keen that my son would be
happy. I do not want him to suffer what I suffered. Therefore I listen very carefully of him,
I`m interested about his school, hobies, friends, etc.
I support him and encouraging.
I still feel guilty about my son that I have destroyed the family and
split with husband. My son meets his father every day.
I have a feeling that I live very wrong, wasting my life.
I am upset and embarrased
and I do not know who I am and what I want. I do not understand what I do in life, what is my task. I do not know why I
live. My relationship with my family and to society is weak. I feel
like I am 'overboard“,
as if I am seceded and unnecessary.
Take this story on my medication, please.

I wait for comments of dr. Kadwa.
Dr. Kadwa, I am grateful for your help.
I study homeopathy myself and I think the best remedy for me is Anacardium.
Isn`t it?

Thank you, dr. Kadwa.
I didn`t take Anacardium still. And before finding out Anacardium I got an answer by the software to take Sulphur. You confirmed this now.
I`ll take Sulphur.
Thank you!

Dr. Mahfooz, thank you.
I believe Ashvagandha is realy useful medicine.
As I have problem with my health fr a long time already I have done some conclusions for myself. Phytotherapeutic medicines are useful to eliminate symphtoms arising after stress. If we have complicated situation we feel stressed and we can eliminate stress symphtoms if it continues not too long time. When we have mental affections it`s not enough to eliminate symphtoms. I could take phytotherapeutic medicine the whole remaining life and my health and my life would be easier. But I hope to relief not only symphtoms as a result of a disease but a disease, too. For this I have to elimintate the reason of disease. The reason of stress can be fear, lack of self`confidence, old mental trauma, unfair wiewpoint, physical diseases, etc. I used a lot of phytotherapeutic remedies such as Valerian, Melissa, Motherworth, Hawthorn, Hop, Ginkgo, Granadilla, Lavender, etc. Their impact is short-lived. I`ll take Ashvagandha if necessary later. Now I try to cure myself with homeopathic remedies. I do not use any other medicines (phytotherapeutic or alophatic) as I want to feel homeopathic remedies action. I hope to get healthy. Like these people: http://hpathy.com/materia-medica/soul-loss-and-recovery-with...
Kind regards!

I received a heavy coryza.
At first, very itchy nose and throat, slightly itchy left ear. A lot of sneezing. Then began to rise phlegm in the throat, nose to flow sharply.

I have Arsenicum Album 200.

Thank you dr. Kadwa.
Now coryza stopped.
I have got my left-side headache again.
Pain is at left temple, left cheekbone and left eye strong. Not so strong pain is at left jawbone, left side of neck and occiput.
My face got swollen a little.
I had to go urinate 4 times at night.
Expectoration dificultly removes.
This pain recurs periodically about once per two mounthes during about 5 years. Without taking remedies the pain reliefs after 3 days. Pain here is at night, too.
The last year this pain occured after using medicines such as vinponcentine, paracetamol, antidepressants, even vitamins. Now it occured after Ars Alb.
Tinitus I feel at left side stronger.
[message edited by Jinai on Mon, 06 Feb 2012 08:56:39 GMT]
[message edited by Jinai on Mon, 06 Feb 2012 09:01:09 GMT]