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Depression

 

 

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Chronic depression, Joyless, adverse to being in the body

33yr old female, diagnosed w/ depression at age 9 after mother was violently murdered in gas station robbery. I feel like a very bright light trapped under a dark shroud. physically i am small framed fair, dark hair, craves salt, vinegar, pickled foods, burgers, sometimes fizzy drinks, i am always cold, indifferent to sex but dream about it in sleep, feel detached from my family with guilt following and then despair. adverse to loud abrupt noises, better with soothing music, better by dance when intoxicated , better outdoors, warm, sad but hopeful alternating with deep despair and suicidal idealizations, fantasy about suicide, dutiful with a need to achieve, guilt and despiar when i cant. better at night. history of illness: shingles at age 16, hpv at age 21, warts and cysts had to be removed as a child 1st grade, scoliosis, dental problems, acne when young. Family: mother had cervical cncer, grandmother breast cncer, great grand cncer. feel like i dont belong in the body, hard to identify with physical expeerience and joy. serious, spiritual extremely. feel overwhelmed by family interaction with overwhelming guilt. angry outbursts, agressive, toward family. very friendly with peers taking on role of therapist. love thunderstorms and rain. I BELIEVE MY REMEDY IS SEPIA, BUT ALSO IDENTIFY WITH AURUM. I BEGAN SEPIA LAST NIGHT AND HAVE BEEN PLAGUED WITH NIGHMARES ON BOTH OCCURANCES OF SLEEP SINCE. the themes were death of a loved one, fear of the dark, indifferance by loved ones, rats, helplessness. I TOOK 30C DOSE 2 PILLS UNDER TONGUE. 1ST DOSE 10PM LAST NIGHT. STARTED AGAIN AT 11AM -230PM-345PM-420PM SLEPT STOPPED DOSAGE Please help me
 
  orion on 2013-02-10
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Please don't take any further doses. See how that affects in next 15-20 days.
 
kadwa last decade
Elaps corallinus covers well your mental state...

Mind; dreams; dead; bodies; putting deceased body in shroud: elaps

We will discuss further after 15 days. Let us see how Sepia goes.
 
kadwa last decade
Thank you for your time. It is greatly appreciated. Last night i developed intense flu like symptoms.Last night i also had disturbing dreams about sex, and some other things i cant remember. When i got up i did feel responsive to music, which i noticed last night as well. This has not been the case for several weeks 6-8. I responded positively and felt uplifted by country music which i dont usually listen to. The flu symptoms were less, almost gone. I have stopped dosage and will post the results here daily.
 
orion last decade

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