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Crippling depression and anxiety

Hello everyone, I'd like to start by saying how much I respect what the homeopathic experts on this site do. It's very noble of you to reach out to those in need and provide help in such a patient manor. I'm sorry this is so disorganized, it was an effort to just get up and do this. I just want to feel better. Therapy sessions didn't work, neither did antidepressants. I feel like homeopathy is my last shot. Thank you in advance for any help you're willing to give.

I'm a 16 year old male, 6'2', eat an organic vegan diet and exercise often. I'm in good shape.
I'll try to be as thorough as possible.

I'll start with my mental conditions:
Fear of social interactions
Brain fog
Suicidal thoughts
Desire to hurt myself
Anxiety; fear of dark
Constant sense of impending doom
Fear of future
Dwelling on past
Constant sadness
Fear of driving
Severe lack of self confidence
Constant feeling of failure
Constant feeling of hopelessness
Apathy
Lack of motivation
Laziness
Short temper
Irritable, constant anger over nothing
Depression and sadness over nothing, or over things that don't matter.

Physical:
(These May or May not have anything to do with my mental conditions, but sometimes certain things are signs of other problems that may not seem connected)

Mild scaring acne on face; small painless pimples that always leave red marks and scars that last for a very long time

Occasional tingling in hands and feet, especially after laying down for a long period of time.

ringing of the ears (I've had this for as long as I can remember, I may have been been born with it)

Severe acne of the back and legs

Occasional headache in the center of forehead

Nose clogs up whenever I lay down

Pain in chest, usually accompanying anxiety.

Fluttering heartbeat, accompanying anxiety.

Hair that falls out easily

Tightness of knee joints (probably from growing)

Itching of face, nose, ears, and toes. (Probably due to anxiety)

Thank you once again for any help you can provide.

I have limited access to the computer, so I will check up on any suggestions as often as I can.
 
  Jordan123 on 2013-12-02
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
jordan, I'd love to take up your case but I am tied up with a lot already.

I am sure someone from this forum should be able to help.

Just a word of caution, true homeopathy works only by using a SINGLE remedy at a time.

Be wary of any practitioner who prescribes more than one remedy at a time.

Good luck.
 
fitness last decade
Thank you, i appreciate the advice.
 
Jordan123 last decade
Hi Jordan,

Please give some detailed info on when all of this began.
What was going on then in your life? moving, changing schools,
a death in the family, problems with parents? bullying or abuse?

Then fill out the answers to the form-
http:/www.abchomeopathy.com/forum2.php/188925
 
simone717 last decade
Thank you for the quick reply.

The confusing thing about my mental state is that nothing seems to have triggered it. I feel selfish for feeling the way I do because I have no reason to be sad. I'm sorry I cannot give you more information about this.
 
Jordan123 last decade
I'm sorry for not understanding, but do you want me to answer the questions here or in the topic that you sent me?
 
Jordan123 last decade
AGE: 16
SEX: Male


1. Describe your main suffering?
Suicidal thoughts, a feeling of pure worthlessness, like there's no point in going on. Anxiety that keeps me confined indoors, makes me afraid to interact with people and makes me feel as though my life is constantly in danger. This seems paradoxical, even to me, considering that I am fearing death irrationally, and yet I'm having suicidal thoughts.



2. What other physical sufferings do you have in your body?

Mild scaring acne on face; small painless pimples that always leave red marks and scars that last for a very long time

Occasional tingling in hands and feet, especially after laying down for a long period of time.

ringing of the ears (I've had this for as long as I can remember, I may have been been born with it)

Severe acne of the back and legs

Occasional headache in the center of forehead

Nose clogs up whenever I lay down

Pain in chest, usually accompanying anxiety.

Fluttering heartbeat, accompanying anxiety.

Hair that falls out easily

Tightness of knee joints (probably from growing)

Itching of face, nose, ears, and toes. (Probably due to anxiety)


3. What mental sufferings / feelings do you have associated with your physical sufferings?

Fear of social interactions
Brain fog
Suicidal thoughts
Desire to hurt myself
Anxiety; fear of dark
Constant sense of impending doom
Fear of future
Dwelling on past
Constant sadness
Fear of driving
Severe lack of self confidence
Constant feeling of failure
Constant feeling of hopelessness
Apathy
Lack of motivation
Laziness
Short temper
Irritable, constant anger over nothing
Depression and sadness over nothing, or over things that don't matter.

4. What exactly do you feel when you are at your worst?

Crushing depression, no motivation to even move at all. A feeling like I should just end it all right then and there. This is accompanied by Deep sadness and weeping.

5. When did it all start? Can you connect it to any past event or disease?

I've never had any disease that endangered my life, nor can I think of a specific time that this started. I feel selfish for being depressed since it seems as though I have no reason to feel this way.

6. Which time of the day you are worst?
Very early morning (1 - 5 AM)
and as I'm lying in bed at night. However, I've had severe episodes at random times throughout the day, including at school.

7. What are the things which aggravate your suffering and which are those which ameliorate the same?

My symptoms are ameliorated by long walks and listening to music, though they are never truly better. My symptoms are aggravated by thinking. When I find my mind wandering, all of my thoughts are dark and depressing. When the temperature is too hot, that also aggravates my symptoms.


8. Do your think your sufferings have relation to any external stimuli (like, change of place) or any internal biological changes in the body, like, menses (in females)?

One of the reasons why I like to walk is so that I'll get lost. The feeling of being lost alleviates some of my depression. Finding new areas to explore is exciting to me. Scents like cinnamon and lemongrass make me temporarily happy, meaning for as long as I can smell them.


9. When do you feel better, during hot weather or cold weather, humid or dry weather?

Cold dry weather is the only weather I enjoy.

10. Describe your general mental set up? Are you Moody, Arrogant, Mild, Agreeable Changeable, Nervous, Suspicious, Easily offended, Quiet, Arguing, Irritating, Lazy etc.

Quiet, lazy (lack of motivation) , changeable, moody, angry, sad, nervous, and suspicious.

- How do you feel before or during a thunderstorm?

I enjoy the rain very much, in fact, I will often go for walks during thunderstorms.

- Do you like being consoled during your tough times?

No, in fact, being consoled often makes me feel worse and I'll often tell the person to leave me alone.

- Are you sensitive to external stimuli like smell, noise, light etc?

I'm very sensitive to noise. Look up the condition misophonia, if you will. Certain sounds such as chewing, scraping, brooms against concrete, and brushing teeth will actually fill me with a consuming rage.


- Do you have any typical habit or gesture like nail biting, causeless
weeping, talking to one self etc?

causeless weeping (when Im alone), nail biting, self-mutilation (cutting, although I've been making an attempt to stop this)

- How do you feel about your friends, family, your children and especially your husband / wife?

My family loves me, but I can't stand to be around them most of the time. My misophonia is worsened when the sounds are made by people that I know well, so I often avoid eating dinner with my family.


11. What are your fears and do you dream of any situation repeatedly?

I fear driving, elevators, commitment (especially intimate relationships with the opposite gender), the future, and I fear that I'll amount to nothing in life. I rarely dream of any situation in the future, because it's hard for me to imagine myself in the future at all.

12. What do you crave for in food items and what are your aversions?

Food doesn't appeal to me very much. It pleases me just as much to eat a salad than to eat a slice of cake.

13. How is your thirst: Less, Normal or Excessive?

Less, I rarely ever feel thirsty.

14. How if your hunger: Less, Normal or Excessive?

Excessive, mostly at times of stress. However, I rarely gain weight from eating. I eat a vegan diet.

15. Is there any kind of food which your body can’t stand?

I have good digestion, but I avoid legumes, dairy, and gluten.

16. Is your sweat normal or less or more? Where does it sweat more: Head, Trunk or Limbs?

Excessive, almost ridiculous amounts, and I'm not overweight. In fact, I'm in shape. My head and trunk mostly, but my hands and feet are often clammy, even when I'm not sweating from any other part of my body.

17. How is your bowel movement and stool type?

I have about 2 or 3 bowel movements a day. They're what I consider normal, but occasionally they're too soft.



18. How well do you sleep? Do you have a particular posture of sleeping?

I sleep in very strange positions, never the same position every night. I sleep well on some nights, but more often than not, I'll struggle to fall asleep and even then, stay asleep.


19. Do you think you are able to satisfy your sexual desires in general?

No.


20. How do you think you are different from others, if at all?

I enjoy studying philosophy and Sanskrit, I turn to homeopathy and herbal medicines before taking pharmaceutical drugs for my diseases. I strongly dislike social interaction.


21. What medications have been taken earlier by you to treat the diseases and do you have any particular symptom surfacing after the medication?

I haven't taken any drug to treat my symptoms, but I tried to take mineral and herbal supplements before. One supplement that worked particularly well was boron. I took 9 mg of boron citrate a few months ago and it created an almost euphoric feeling. I had no anxiety or depression, and my thinking was clearer. However, the effects were short lived, and after about an hour of feeling normal I was back to feeling depressed and anxious. After about two weeks taking the boron, at much lower doses (3 mg), it hardly had any effect on me anymore. I'm not sure whether or not the high dose of boron was actually what caused that euphoric feeling. I tried Ginkgo Biloba for my brain fog, but It just gave me a headache.

22. What major diseases are running in your family?


My grandfather has diabetes and died of a malignant tumor of the jaw. My aunt has anxiety and depression.


23. Describe, how do you look like? Describe your overall appearance
I think that I'm ugly, but others don't seem to think so. I don't like how childish my face looks. Many girls seem interested in me until they realize how miserable I am.
 
Jordan123 last decade
Hi, I have some more questions and there may be more after this.

1. Have you had a physical in the last year or so, and had bloodwork
done, etc.
2. How are your teeth? When was your last dental check up?
3. This condition had a start point. You must remember at some
point not feeling like this. It is important in homeopathy for you
to remember when this started- even if it was age 7. And then
talk about what was going on at that time, even if you think
it has nothing to do with any of this.
4. When did you become a vegan and why?
5. What medications, anti- depressants have you been on- list
the medicines and how long you took them.
List when the last time you had medications for this.
6. What do your parents say about all this? Are they concerned?
Do they try to ascertain how you are each day? Do they know you
self harm?
7.What country are you in?
8. How long were you in therapy and are you doing any therapy now?
9. Did the therapist give you any education on how to handle
emotions bc self harm is tied to emotional overwhelm?

Thanks.
 
simone717 last decade
Thank you for taking the time to help me.

I suppose I should've added this to the previous list when it asked what I fear, but needles are definitely one of them, so no I haven't had blood work done, nor have I had a physical.

I recently got my braces off, and the health of my teeth is pretty good, at least from what I can tell.

I guess when I finished middle school was when it got really bad. I don't think any particular event triggered it, but talking about college and driving and life in the real world really scared me. I literally had panic attacks thinking about it. I have no self confidence so these upcoming changes and challenges seem insurmountable. I am also really lonely because I could never bring myself to talk to people, especially girls. The strange part is that while I feel so uncomfortable around people, I long for a relationship where I know I have a person I can trust who will be there for me. I think what I really want is to be loved by somebody who can totally understand me, because not many people do. In fact,I don't even understand me. If I did, I wouldn't be here looking for help.


I became a vegan at the end of August, so about three months ago, because I felt responsible for the deaths of the animals I ate and for the cruelty that the animals went through to provide me with milk and eggs when they aren't even necessary for my survival.

I was only on one medication. Prozac for 6 months, but I convinced my parents to let me stop taking it because it really didn't seem to make a difference. I've been off of it since June last summer.

I don't live with my father, and when I do see him, he's usually very busy with his work. He does express concern though, as does my mother. My father actually very recently had a talk with me when I was feeling especially worthless and he talked to me for about an hour explaining to me how much I mean to him and other people in my life, and although his words weren't intended to hurt, they made me feel like I'd let him down since I don't feel like I'm important or that I've done or can do anything worthy of having him be proud of me. My mom does show concern and she does ask how I'm feeling, but she also knows I like to be left alone and doesn't try to push me to talk too often. When she does, it's usually a brief conversation. Neither of them know I self harm.

I live in the United States

I was in therapy for about as long as I was taking the Prozac because that was the time that my parents realized the extent of my depression and they wanted to do anything they could to help. I don't do therapy anymore for 2 reasons. 1: I left like a leech. Because of my selfish depression, my parents had to dish out a lot of money for my therapy sessions. 2: I do not like talking to people about my problems.

While I was there, my therapist told me to really focus on my emotions when I felt angry or sad and try to think about why I felt that way rather than let my emotions build up inside of me. He told me to keep a journal and write down all of my emotions and explain why I felt that way.
 
Jordan123 last decade
Hi Jordan,

Are your parents divorced then? And did you stop living with your father at middle school age?
Separation of the parents is considered
a traumatic event, and kids always blame any problems they have from events like that
on themselves. They often feel neglected and are neglected in reality by what the parents
are going thru and this is a cause of these problems you are having- they don't come out of
nowhere. You are not a leech by any means and often if parents are not aware of the effects
of things like this on their children they don't handle things properly because they don't
know any better.


There are specific strategies to use for self harm- I don't think you had the
right therapist. But putting that aside, what would your parents say about going to a good
homeopath in person for this?

When you see a homeopath in person, they spend about an hour and half with you and it is
rather like a good therapy session- then they give you the remedy and you report in how it is
going and then go for a follow up after a month. There are many more tools to work with
seeing you in person and then supervising you down the line as you get better. There are
some remedies that really stand out for you, but I feel that due to your parents not knowing
the extent of how badly you feel , etc that you need at least one person who knows what
is going on and that you can trust.

I know at your age, it is very hard for most to talk about their problems , but
you have to have at least one person who will understand. I really think
online treatment for you is the wrong way to go and I can help if you want to find you a good homeopath in
your area or many do skype and phone that is well qualified to monitor you.


Let me know.

Best,

Simone 717
[message edited by simone717 on Tue, 03 Dec 2013 15:10:48 GMT]
 
simone717 last decade
Yes, they're divorced and he stopped living with us when I was in 8th grade.

I'm sure my parents would gladly take me to see a homeopath for this. There's a place by where I live called The Natural Pharmacy, which I believe deals in homeopathic medicine. I'll look into that more. I will certainly take you up on your offer if I need any help. I completely understand that online treatment isn't the best for me, and I know I need to talk to somebody about my problems. Although it's hard, I'll try To confide in somebody I trust, perhaps I'll even attempt to find a different therapist.

I truly appreciate everything you've done and all the support and guidance you've given me. I was totally lost before, but now I have a path to follow. I wish the best to you.
 
Jordan123 last decade
Hi Jordan,

It is important that you get a homeopath who practices
homeopathy almost 75 % of the time. There are a lot of
naturopath doctors who do some homeopathy but they
are only minimally trained in homeopathy. You need a homeopath
who has a lot of experience in mental health cases and also
has at least 6 years of practice doing homeopathy.

The right counseling can help you get the big picture framework
right about how things are supposed to work in regards
to parenting, etc and get the support you need when there is a lack
there.It is common knowledge that when people divorce they
should get family counseling and separate counseling for children
to help everyone adjust and make sure kids are not carrying a
burden of guilt and low self esteem, etc. Many kids feel shoved
into an over- responsible role depending on what parent they
are living with, trying to fill a gap and this is not age appropriate
and causes huge anxiety bc it simply is not meant to be that way.

You need the correct remedies bc they will do a huge part of
settling your mind and emotions back to a stable place and
therapy can help but it cannot do that part of it , which is
why they prescribe the drugs ( which just suppress everything)
and don't release and heal things. Make sure you tell the homeopath
about taking the boron bc boron is a remedy in a couple different
forms and that one is going to help you with the noise sensitivity,
the elevator fears etc-but you are also going to need the remedy
for grief and trauma which would be ignatia and that one can
make old things come up and release ( emotions) quite fast-
like one episode every 20 minutes for a few days and then
you will be calmer but it can be quite intense and I have
supported people taking that, reassured them it is ok while
they are going thru releasing emotions-so forewarned is forearmed,
and happy to research options for homeopaths and counselors
in your area that I think have the skill set to get you the results
you want- it is so important to have an experienced doctor who
has dealt with these issues successfully, you save a lot of time.

In the meantime, when self harm comes up you can call this
800 number and talk to a counselor- and you can also
go onto the boystown site where they have an entire page of
different strategies to use. 1 800 DONT CUT
The hotline is for all ages. They will help you regardless of how old you are. They are trained to be understanding and you call tell them right away that you have anxiety issues and they will work with you.
__________________

Take care,

Simone717
[message edited by simone717 on Tue, 03 Dec 2013 15:06:05 GMT]
 
simone717 last decade
I have sifted through these posts.

The best way forward is to have a face to face consult with a 'classical homeopath' and not take any remedy on your own.

If for any reason you can't do that (most classical homeopaths are pretty expensive), then I'd be willing to take up the case. You can look up my profile by clicking my name.

Unless I am confident that I can treat your case, I won't prescribe.
 
fitness last decade
Yes, Jordan,

The BEST way is paragraph 2 of Fitness's post - I could
have also prescribed, but I felt it would be irresponsible
to do this online given your age and what you are going
thru.
 
simone717 last decade
Thank you so much for all of the wonderful tips and advice. It's touching that a total stranger would be willing to provide as much help and support as you have. I'll make sure that I research the homeopaths thoroughly before I decide to go to them. I genuinely thank you for helping me, and showing concern for my condition. You seem truly know what's best for me and for why I'm going trough.

Also, fitness, I'll let you know if I require any further assistance, but I will be trying to be face to face with a heomeopath. I appreciate your concern. Thank you for the advice.

I wish the best to both you,
[message edited by Jordan123 on Tue, 03 Dec 2013 11:19:25 GMT]
 
Jordan123 last decade

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Information given in this forum is given by way of exchange of views only, and those views are not necessarily those of ABC Homeopathy. It is not to be treated as a medical diagnosis or prescription, and should not be used as a substitute for a consultation with a qualified homeopath or physician. It is possible that advice given here may be dangerous, and you should make your own checks that it is safe. If symptoms persist, seek professional medical attention. Bear in mind that even minor symptoms can be a sign of a more serious underlying condition, and a timely diagnosis by your doctor could save your life.