To Dr. Kadwa

[message deleted by Manoj99 on Mon, 08 Dec 2014 13:11:28 GMT]

[message deleted by Manoj99 on Mon, 08 Dec 2014 13:12:02 GMT]

Doctor,

Thank you for taking up my case. May I request you to prioritize on my other sufferings which are show stopper for my career progress since childhood.

I have many depression symptoms but, the one troubles me excessively is Obsessive thoughts.

The obsessive thoughts (started from age of 8) in my case can be:
• My mind keeps on thinking about some (unspecific) matter, and thoughts arise about another matter which is related current matter/persons involved in current matter. And this nested loop of matters keeps going on and on. Never stops!
• During sleep some matter keeps on running in my mind irrespective of significance. Dwelling on the past, procrastinations, negative thinking, and sexual fantasies. If I think on a matter during day time excessively, that matter runs again during my sleep and in dreams.
• I will be hurted (mentally, due to sensitive mind) easily and my mind keeps on thinking of the matter, about the cause of the matter, the way conversation happened, the way conversation could have been, about its consequences, the way the conversation/consequences would be, for weeks and even for months. Thinking about persons involved in the matter, about the character of the persons, persons related to persons...and this chain goes on.... Mainly the thoughts are fantacizing the conversations between me and the people involved in the matter.
• So far I have never took any decision without lots & lots of judgment, evaluation of pros & cons. I will go for Judgment/arguments even for things/points which not even stand up to significance.
• As my mind is always completely occupied with non-sense matters, very very very very poor concentration towards my current job/studies, short-term memory loss (Eg: unable to remember what password I have typed, what changes I have made, did I locked the door, did I turned-off lights before leaving home etc.), I am unable to understand what I see, hear, what is happening around me, what I am talking, how does that mean to others etc. Due to this my thought less conversations appears sheer innocent and childish to my neighbors. They often take advantage of my innocence. I am the one loses, always! This kind of matters hurts me when I realize...again the dwelling on this matter starts...this kind of nested thoughts occupy my mind.
• Lazy to do anything, my mind looks for various points to stop me doing the things, even though I am aware that I should do and would be better to do so! Lot of judgment to avoid doing things, not even limited to brush my teeth and bath, to drink water in the bottle which is just next to my hand in 5cm.s!
• Because of being in semi-trans mentality, I appear dull, preoccupied, and innocent; my skin looks dry, shine less. People laugh at me. They say 'I am different'.
• I have tried pranayama, meditation, tried very hard, many times for many days! The result is I ended up exactly where I have started. Not even 0.25% improvement w.r.t. concentration, or controlling thoughts.
• My thoughts are only controlled only when I am under extreme work pressure, as much as even I can’t notice somebody calling me/ that I am hungry/ I am thirsty.
• Thoughts won't stop even if I sleep. Importantly, they won’t let me go sleep.

My other deression symptoms which are observed since I am 10 yrs. include excited mind, sensitive mind, absolutely unable to handle pressure, unable to sleep, sudden mood changes, multiple personalities identified in me, excessive sweating under arm pits, excessive tension to write exams, lazieness, postponement, delay, negative thinking, short-term memory loss, mind losses energy easily due to excessive thinking, bed wetting (till 21 yrs).

I have consulted a doctor who suggested remedies for depression (except the obsessive thoughts). All remedies were working for some time and gradually the effect nullifies. I feel something wrong with my body.
The remedies I have used:
Carsinosinum 200 (1 dose)
Damiana Q 1m (quite for some time)
Staphysagaria (2 doses)
China 200 (1 dose)
Baryata Carbonica 200 (3 doses)
Acid Phos 200
Natrium Phosphoricum(2 doses/day--one week)
Natrium Sulphoricum(2 doses/day--one week)
Platina 1m(2 doses)
Sepia 200(1 dose)

My other suffering include hair fall (from 4 yrs), acidity (from 10 yrs), physical health very very poor, no smoking, no drinking, vegetarian, slow, dull, unable to think accurate, fast while talking/actions, masturbation.

I am seeking your help to prioritize the treatment starting with obsessive thoughts and other depression symptoms, follwed by. Then to the perverted behavior. I was trying Pranayama but, obsessive thoughts are not at all allowing me to do so. I have bright career aspirations. Please help me get out of these hurdles as soon as we can. Please advise!

Thanks and regards,
[message edited by Manoj99 on Sun, 22 Jun 2014 09:27:18 BST]

Sir,

It has been two weeks now after I took the remedy. Would like to bring to your attention that I could find only a very little betterment in my sleep habits and not being pressurised. But, other things remain the same.

One major problem I have is I am physically very poor and body with absolute malnutrtion and acidity. I feel my body is not healthy enough to completely absorb the remedies. Even my earlier remedies were showing effect for short time and the effect vanishes later. This is just my opinion. Please advise. Shall I wait for 2 more weeks as advised or we have a new remedy..

Regards,

Sir,

As advised, I took Natrum Mur 200 dose. After 2 weeks my mental conditions is as below:

Untill the 10th day, I did not see an change/betterment.

After that, I found my-self a bit disciplinary & little careful about my future.

Presence of mind has little up-liftment of 5% - 10%. Howeever, the severity of obsessive thoughts is the same. Generally, my body is somewhere and my mind will be somewhere. This makes me 95% lost mentally; unable to understand, identify, guess, interprete, sense the things/matters others are showing/talking/assigning to me. My mental ability and aptitude is absolutely zero. As said above, after 10th day of Natrum Mur, I find a very little difference.

In this context, I would like to bring to your notice that, I feel the goodness of depression remedies whenever I have good sleep. And due to pressures and obsessive thoughts, I will have such sleep once or twice an year (365 days)..and that too will be disturbed for a very little sounds.

one thing I want to inform - After the third dose of N Mur, I had leg injury and I have used 5 Pain killer tablets and pain relief spray for a week (inhaed). May I know whether this effect on functioning of Natrum mur?


Physically, I am very weak, I look dull, energy less, plae, shine less skin. Absolutley, no harmonal/nutritional values. Even due to masturbation, I won't keep testosterone. I will try to control masturbation. I will be easily emotional.

I feel I need a sound body to get/identify the exact results of remedies. I used to have very thick & silky long hair. These days I have exceptinally severe hair loss. Now, I am almost bald at scalp. But, all hair roots are active on scalp but, hair roots damaged at forehead.

Please suggest next remedy. And the food (for good health and harmones) & other habits to see expected results for the prescribed remedies.

Thanking you!
[message edited by Manoj99 on Sun, 10 Aug 2014 08:49:59 BST]
[message edited by Manoj99 on Thu, 03 Nov 2016 19:08:02 UTC]

Sir,

Today is the 15th day after the dosage.

Coming to my external pressures, since chikdhood I feel very stressful. Even my work ambience is highly stressful; I have lost almost all my hair over the scalp, sleeplessness etc.

I am relatively stress free from 2 months. Even then, I was unable to get sleep not less than 1 - 1.5 hrs after I go to bed in the night (after 12 midnight). I was unable to get up in the morning, drowsy on bed even after 10 am.

After the Anacardium Orient 200 dose, it is taking too less time to fall sleep, the sleep quality is better and I am able to get up from bed before 8am without drowsy feeling. Thank you!

But, on the 9th ot 10th day after dose, while I am feeling confident about the above mentioned betterment; I had a moment hurted my feelings/ego badly! That night I did not go to bed until 1:30 am, struggled a lot to sleep as earlier, I went to sleep some time after 2:45am. I got up from bed after 8:30am.

This indicates, the medicine still has to show impact even I am overstressed.

I still feel the thoughts are uncontrollable; might be a little betterment. But, I didnot/could not feel such a betterment I have noticed on my sleep disorder.

I want to bring to your observation that, physically/mentally and nutritionally I am very weak; hair loss, hyperacidity are additional problems to my depressed psychology. I have browsed over internet and using 'ASHWAGANDHA' & 'SHILAJIT' twice daily. I have used this combination from 9th - 12th days after the dosage. from the 10th day, I was getting sleep at 9pm - 10:30pm, and I was getting up from bed before 6:30am. Even if I sleep late night, I was able to get up early. Now, I have stopped these two, and could get up before 8:30 am.

Another 10% betterment after the dosage is Understading/perception of things.

Can I continue 'ASHWAGANDHA' & 'SHILAJIT'. While browsing Pathanjali medicines, I have read the combination of ASHWAGANDHA + SHILAJITH can cure.

My belly is big, my buttocks are fatty, eventhough I take very little oil, my face looks pale, shine less, dull, teeth are yellow, hyperacidity, lack of interest, very sensitive mind.....etc.

Sir, please ask me any further questions for analysing my case as better as possible.

Please advise on further
remedy to overcome depression.


Regards,
[message edited by Manoj99 on Sat, 30 Aug 2014 18:27:46 BST]
[message edited by Manoj99 on Thu, 03 Nov 2016 19:09:46 UTC]

Sir,

3 months back I had two/three doses of Platina 200 and it caused me to get some hold of sensitive mind and also some manly nature. But, I saw some reckless behaviour when I had an overdose than the suggested. My intention in mentioning this point is - My mind was much more sensitive before using Platina 200, and I am not sure whether the Platina 200 took 3 months back is still working/not.

Please suggest.

Regards,

Sir,

I could not find Mancinella, can anyother substitute be used for my suffering.

Sir, I am helpless about my same sex attraction problem; and feeling jealous towards other males enjoying family life. Even 2 or 3 year old kids are strongly demonstrating their manliness attracting/flirting/kissing girls of their age. Sir, this is such a painful thing my heart breakes, breakes, breakes and breakes.........Sir, please guide me in a proper direction so that I will be naturally healthy.

Regards,
[message edited by Manoj99 on Thu, 04 Sep 2014 17:22:49 BST]

Sir,

I could not find Mancinella available in the stores around.

Please help me such that I will be naturally healthy by overcoming my physical/psychological problems; and I will be socially acceptible by overcoming the same sex attraction. I cannot accept this feeling; but, it happens, out of my control!

Thanking you!

Sir,

This is the update after 14 days from the dosage.

I am sensitive minded. When I took the Phosphoros 200 dose, for 3 - 4 days, my mind was repeatedly & severely excited and thinking about the cheating/insult happened to me. I was trying too hard to control my-self. But, the feeling of hurting is severe; I was unable to control.

After 4 or 5 days - I am calm. But, whenever there is an occasion to feel bad (somebody hiding matters, jealous, secrecy, privacy, exploiting me, cheating me, insulting me) OR if somebody reminds about such matters, again my mind begins to excite and speak severe words/character assassination/finding faults etc. - This happens only when there is an occasion, but for the first 4 days - the thoughts are always completely and severely about these matters, not occasional.

I am not sure whether the infinite loops of thoughts have seen a low/yet to be; but, I am sure that my acidity levels are almost had a betterment about 20%. I am happy to see my acidity has a control. 4 months before, to control acidity I have used Nat Phos & Nat Sulph. But, the acidity was as usual after the medicines. Sir, my acidity has seen a low, thank you!

Overall, the sensitivity to get excited needs to see betterment. If I am hurted by somebody psychologically.
I am little better attentive and careful when talking to others.
I have some feeling that my acididy is at a little low, many thanks Sir!

My belly is convex. My face is dull; dark circles around the eyes, severe hair fall, talking innocent, mood swings, feel inferior, lazy, weary, I hate ladies, I am jealous looking at males enjoyoying family life (as I am unfortunate in this matter), I like babies & kids; but, I can not have sexual intercourse & give birth.

Sir, if anyother symptoms required to analyse my case, please tell me.

I have career ambitions - I need a good mind, physical health & mindset.
My parent are want me to marry - I need to be straight as all the men. I am avoiding marriage by telling cock & bull stories to my parents.

Keeping my depression & same sex attraction problems into consideration, please suggest next remedy.

Many thanks & regards,
[message edited by Manoj99 on Sun, 28 Sep 2014 13:25:08 BST]
[message edited by Manoj99 on Sun, 28 Sep 2014 13:25:47 BST]

Sir,

Update after 3rd week of Phosphorous 200:

My acidic feelings are less.
Coming to mind behaviour - I am able to be comparitively stable and thinking before I speak to someone. I mean, around 10% betterment on perception.

The time between reaching bed and going to sleep is 40% better. I feel comparitively 40% better sleep. I could get up early before 6:45 am ( earlier I was struggling to get up even after 9am).

Sir, thank you verymuch!
Please suggest next remedy. Please go through above post also.

Regards,

[message deleted by Manoj99 on Mon, 08 Dec 2014 13:07:31 GMT]

[message deleted by Manoj99 on Sat, 08 Nov 2014 11:56:38 GMT]