Tetnus

Thanks.
I still have no idea if this is related to the puncture wound from the darning needle. I feel as it is. But I don't know. I'm pretty scared because my muscles have never felt like this before.

I went to the emergency room after my doctor said it could be very serious and I needed to go there. But after waiting 5 hours without anyone seeing me, I left.

I don't know what this thing with all my muscles is if it is not tetanus.

Oh, by the way, I'm one of the Americans who is poor. I don't have health insurance,
and when I don't have food and go to my local agency for it, I'm given a lot of things that have expired and are rotten and spoiled and then a few dozen donuts and a few loaves of bread...

Gosh, is America so ME oriented now, that it refuses to feed the poor?

Your attitude is rather Reagan-esque.

Deplorable.

You sound like an American.
You sound self-centered and selfish and mean spirited.

Sorry, but I don't feel at all well and your attitude reminds me of the bad food.

I wrote the following to my doctor on Saturday, Oct. 2:

Here’s my medical problem:
On Saturday, August 14, 2004, I accidentally jammed a darning needle into my big toe.
I didn't realize it had broken off in my toe because I have a bit of peripheral neuropathy. But then a couple days later when I was giving myself a B12 shot there was this glint at the end of my toe where the sunshine was hitting it and it turned out there was a quarter inch piece of needle left in my toe. I pulled it out with tweezers.

And it turned out that was only half of the eye end of the needle. I got the other half out, too. But that was pretty hard because it was like a hook where it had broken and it caught and I just had to yank it.

Then a red line formed on my toe, under the nail, only I have soooo little money that I didn't try to come and see you. Instead, I got Epsom salts and Vitamin C. I soaked my foot for about four hours a day each day for about a week, and I ate a couple small bottles of Vitamin C.

The lines (there were three at one point, all quite tidy lines that looked as precise as if they’d been drawn using a ruler) seemed to get fainter; there wasn’t any swelling and mostly I didn’t feel like I had a fever.

Then, so much time had passed that I thought there was nothing to worry about.

Only on Thursday, September 30, I got major, extremely painful cramps in all the muscles around my waist area. It was so painful that I actually cried out.

I thought it was because I was so cold because I didn’t want to put heat on when I don’t have money.

And I also wondered if it was from bad food.

I don’t know if you know this or not, but the food that is given to people who need food is largely expired and somewhat rotten and spoiled. The eggs, for instance, were all cloudy and after I ate some of them last month I decided it was just too risky. But I couldn’t remember on Thursday of this week what I’d eaten from the food box on Wednesday.

Oh, you should probably also know that the food generally includes several loaves of bread and dozens of donuts, I think there were 4 dozen donuts the first time I got the food. The administrators don’t seem to ask if anyone has diabetes. None of the people I saw there looked very healthy. I think this is pretty appalling to be happening in the United States.

I think about my grandfather who was President of the American Farm Bureau Federation when I was little, and how what I remember most about him, besides him being on the radio debating then Secretary of Agriculture Benson, who was later head of the Mormon Church, was that he was so hopeful that American farmers could produce enough food to end hunger world wide.

Because he was a Republican and friends with Barry Goldwater, I suppose he would have supported and favored Reagan.

But I think that Reagan may be the reason that today Americans think it is okay to give
“trickle down” food, as it were, to people in need.

Anyway, on Friday my muscles were still tight around my abdomen, and the pain was not at all like when I put my back out, because for one thing it wasn’t around my back.

Because your office is closed on Fridays, I called Alice Sisneros, whose receptionist called me back and said that Alice said I should go to the Emergency Room because with a puncture wound it could be serious.

So, I went right away, which was around 3 p.m. By nearly 8 p.m. no one had seen me, so I left because I was thinking it was going to be such a huge bill and besides last time I was there, when I’d tried to kill myself, they’d done all the tests but never acted on them, like by telling me I needed B12 shots regularly. So I figured that I might as well leave and check the internet to see if I was supposed to have a fever.

The internet said that symptoms could show up months later. It sounded like you could have all the muscle problems and not be expecting them because there wasn’t a major fever.

It said that in 60% of untreated cases death occurred, which I thought was hopeful because I could be in the 40%....

The fact is that it’s been a long time since I had a tetanus shot. Whether it’s thirty years or eleven, I can’t be sure. But it’s been over ten.

I’m writing this because I can go over it and be sure it’s clear, and that will save me getting confused while I try to give you all the facts in a conversation.

I would like to get whatever test there is to identify whether or not I have tetanus.
It’s a worry, not knowing. And, I don’t want to wake up some night unable to breath because the muscles in my chest have tightened.

Thank you for your ongoing help in such slim pickings times.

I don't think they care about individuals.

I am feeling very sick. My blood looked really weird when it was drawn for the test.

The lady reminded me that my heart is a muscle.

I have been feeling nausious for two days now.

Cheney and Halliburton and the likes are doing great here in America.

My cousin is married to a trial lawyer who fought against paying people that the pace maker company he worked for had hurt. My cousin refused to send me $25. This is the country of the greedy and self centered.

Of course we don't mind killing a lot of people in Iraq if there's a profit to be made. That's how we treat our own people, and others who do not have enough money to be important.