Kidneys long-term problem

I am a 54 year old (born 1958) female and have had kidney problems off-and-on for many years. I remember as a child having kidney infections (I suppose I received antibiotics as I live in the U.S. but don't know when those came into common use). As an adult I had kidney stones 3 times. About 10 years ago I made a change in diet and hardly ever drink soda pop and make sure I drink a lot of 'filtered' water. I live in a city that adds fluoride to the water and uses chlorine for water treatment so I filter everything with a Brita except the shower water.
I often have a dull ache in my kidneys especially on my left side. I retain water (which raises my blood pressure) and my body begins to ache and I get a headache from the raise in blood pressure so I take a diretic and get some relief. I am short-waisted so the waist band of my pants often rests right across my kidneys which can be unbearable. When I put my hands on my kidneys to hold them I notice that the skin is cold even when I am very hot in the summer. Warming the area with my hands or a hot water bottle is comforting but not lasting.

I have three issues that I believe may impact my kidneys.
1) I have many 'silver' filings in my teeth which obviously contain mercury and started getting these filings when I was 12 years old.
2) My father has often complained of kidney pain so could be an issue of heredity.
3) I have had a very stressful life for many years and I know that adrenals sit on top of the kidneys and this can over-tax my kidneys.

I would like to get the 'silver' filings removed from my mouth but my finances will not permit.

I take a liquid herbal kidney formula that contains Juniper Berries, Corn Silk, Uva Ursi, Horsetail, Pipsissewa Leaf, Burdock, and Goldenrod flowers and when the pain is very sharp it reduces that pain but is not lasting.

Can anyone advise me?
Thank you so much - Ann