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Super emotional and weep too easily and frequently

I am 33 years old female, mother of 2 children.
I cry/weep too easily if i listen to any sad/emotional song or watch any movie or see anyone in pain. I had been like this since childhood. I was very emotional But since I got married,almost 7 years now, I couldnt stop crying at all. My husband is chronic alcoholic and i am financially dependent on him. I would also like to mention that I have always been an intelligent and bright student and I am studying till now, giving exams but always miss selection by slight margin as if I am cursed for forever. I am super ambitious but i never got my dream job or any satisfactory job. I try, i fail, i cry and then somehow gather up my courage and start preparing again...its been 10 years now..not less..now also i am preparing for state civil services ..I never got love, support and much needed motivation from my husband. Time is flying fast and now I am left with nothing but responsibility of two growing children and this depression and grief of not getting desired job or desired husband...i also know that my life condition is affecting my parents big time and they are more or equally sad as me and they also cant seem to do anything for me.
There is also persistent anger in me because my mother in law tricked me into marrying his son to me and now she takes no responsibility of him. I also feel bad that despite being a good person all along my life, dedicated to this single man and he also not taking care of me and my children, even mock my emotions and cries..he doesnt seem to bother at all..
I dont know how I am going to take care of my children. As if God is angry at me for some reason...how hard i try i am not getting job infact those who got selected always say i deserved it more than them and wish me luck for future.....i cant seem to protect my children from my own abusive husband..i dont have anywhere to go. I cant even go to my parents. I want financial independence. I have also compromised with my destiny that i dont want love or anything just a job for raising my children with dignity and pride. I also would like to mention that i am a good looking and bold person on the outside, always happy and cheerful and no one had any slightest of idea that i am this much broken on the inside. Now this things also seeming to shatter as i discussed my condition with 2-3 close people. I cant seem to hold back now. I am even crying now as i am typing. Sometimes when i cry too much or when i start to cry, there is a severe pain around my eyes as if all the arteries and veins at once started sucking something out of me. Please help!
 
  Ganga1 on 2018-08-22
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Please take

Sepia 200c single dose (2 drops directly on tongue or 4 pills)-- do not repeat

Kali phos 6x 4 tablets 3 times a day for 1 week



Please do not take anything 20
min before and after the medicine.
Avoid camphor, coffee, garlic, mint, perfumes..
Do not take any other homoeopathic medicine along with this.
[Edited by Mister4 on 2018-08-22 11:24:50]
 
Mister4 5 years ago
Hello Ganga,

Life have lots of challenges we need to be prepared to face all the hurdles in life. No need to cry stand up and face the situation.

Gone thru you entire case , it makes me feel SAD for the plight in which you are moving. BUT i see that you are a real fighter and would like to getup more strong with each fall. This is the fighting spirit within you that makes you unique fighter.

Tell me about your Childhood Memories, About your favorite sports, you hobby, instances that make you feel better, your mind power, which climate you love, which food you love, which place you love to visit.......

i would like to hear more from your side before i prescribe you something....


Blessings,
Nikie.
 
Nikkie 5 years ago
Thanks Mister 4
 
Ganga1 5 years ago
Thanks a lot Nikki..Thanks for saying such good words and asking. Now when i think of it, no one has asked about me for so long. Thanks for asking.
I was very happy go lucky, super bubbly and charming person but at the same time emotional too. I lived in extremes...if I was happy then I was super happy and if sad then super sad too..but i used to get upset over stupid trivial things like watching an emotional movie or when my best friend got injured. When i heard a classmate lost her mother..i had this ability of relating every bad thing happening in the world to myself like what if something happens to my mom or things like that. Honestly, i had great childhood and God like parents. They are the only reason I am still alive and pushing myself ahead because I so desperately want to make them proud of me and only my heart knows how dearly i want them to see me happy and at peace so that whenever their time come..they leave peacefully ! My present condition is not only worsening their lives but also wont let them die peacefully. (I am sorry for saying such things). I never had any boyfriend or serious relationship before marriage and I believed in institution of marriage a lot. Mine is arranged.
Well, I used to love writing poems, i used to draw as well, i used to read a lot...fiction preferably..i loved visiting places..i believed and still believe travelling and seeing different places is what life is meant for.. I like eating North Indian, south Indian, chinese cuisines, I am vegetarian.
Yes, one more thing...i liked meeting new people, i liked to dress up for every occassion .. I really never knew what actual pain, suffering, sadness, depression, grief is until I had my first child. Till now, I have superb friends who know nothing or very lil about this. I am very afraid of people pitying me. I dont want anyone to have pity on me.
Well, I somehow accepted my husband and his behaviour but his behaviour with my children is unacceptable. His childhood was horrible and he belongs from a dysfunctional family and that explains his drinking but he is zero willed man with no vision. And if at this point i leave him then he will die within a year..its just that I am keeping him alive by feeding him food and keeping him sober during daytime. His father and younger brother died because of excessive drinking. Now, I am in dilemma...i cant leave him because my children and I are dependent on him financially.. but also we cant live with him because he is abusive(physical, mental, emotional) when drunk. It hurts and shatters my heart to see my small daughter seeing this everyday and learning abuses and asking me meaning of it. She consoles me by hugging me every night saying that she will be bigger than papa one day and she will buy a house n a pink car for us and she will take me and her brother away and will leave papa here.
Well,I have zeroed down to only one solution- My job. Then we will have money and I can even put him in de-addiction centre for a year or so and I could bear the expenses.
I wish he quit drinking, i wish i get a decent job, i wish we buy a house of our own, i wish we live peacefully, i wish my parents are proud of me, i wish my children get all the love they deserve and they become happy, successful, humble people in future, i wish for nothing else!
 
Ganga1 5 years ago
And yes I was very talkative but i have stopped talking to people. I have deleted whatsapp. I hate going out as I am afraid I might start weeping if someone asks me how am i. I weep silently for hours continuously and I sob a lot. Its like there is a heavy weight on my chest that is not lifting. I so desperately need a hug from someone who say ..dont worry, i am here with you..everything will be allright. I cant even ask for a hug from my own mother because I will definitely start weeping and she will know and i will hurt her more..now a days i pretend that i am okay and dont care much and he is also behaving good...though, she knows but not hearing me crying over phone is still better.
Please help me, help me with these tears...i want to be tough stone like...i dont want people showing sympathy or pitying me. I dont want to do this self-pity as well. Stop these tears..somehow..please!
 
Ganga1 5 years ago

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