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Looking for help, advice, connection

I am a 28 female, never married. I've come to a point where I don't see a way out, only recently I managed to admit myself that I am sick and I need help, coz I want to get better.
Background: when a child, aversion to food, stomach cramps and pains, no appetite. Constipation (for about 20 years) due to shyness, embarrassment, bad odor. Inflammation of inner ear,suppuration, perforated ear drums. Kidneys infection. Always extremely cold, cold limbs.Profuse perspiration, bad smell. Seeking for order and justice in world, frustration bouts when nothing changes. Acne on face, specially back on shoulders.
Today's symptoms: runny nose, emotions going up and low, no strength and will to live, though can't kill myself (respecting what is not mine, i.e. body), low consumption of food due despondency and stress. Indifference though feeling I could do anything, but seeing no point. Feeling of not fitting in, feeling as living not according to my values, thus, can't work. Weak memory, distracted when speaking, can't remember words, can't express myself, thus more frustration. Thinking about death as a salvation which can't be reached. Feeling extremely lonely, and among friends and family. Feeling that people will hurt me, hence, can't live on my own. Need to change places, jobs, go where haven't been before, but can't coz fear of strange people. Constant sense of guilt, despondency, self pity, need to rush, but can't do anything. Feeling like wasting my time and life. Pimples, pustules, pigmented scars on shoulders, face (corners of forehead, and cheeks). Restless sleep. Dreams that always running late or back to school and doing things, that have been done years ago. Sore throat (middle), constantly cold. Heavy perspiration when hot and cold.Extremely annoyed and ashamed of that, and yet, feeling ok with bad smell coming off of me. Aversion to showering (due to chillness) Headaches after starvation and stress, pressing, bandage around forehead. Drink loads of water (only warm). Fear of going insane, also fear of becoming or being an imbecile. Abandoned my responsibilities, can't take care of myself. Need to hide from everyone and also a great fear to be alone.
>when not cold and not hot, when feeling safe, when lying (on both sides), after crying
  poplar on 2010-11-30
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Hello 'poplar'

I would like to look at your case. I have to study your post, and then I come back to you. Okay?

Parakletos; practitioner of classical homeopathy
Parakletos last decade
After reading what you wrote, I think, in fact, that Mercurius is the right medication for you. What you describe is very similar to this remedie.

Therefore, i propose that you start with a dose of Mercurius 200C, only one dose. After that you must wait a few days.
( Mercurius solubilis,or Mercurius vivus )
Remember to take the medicine at least half an hour before or after food. Do not drink coffee or other caffeine-containing beverages. Neither menthol or camphor, peppermint.

Give me a report about a week, or before if something special would happen.

And you just have to ask whether there are any questions.

Sincerly Parakletos
Parakletos last decade
Thank you, I will give a go for what you've recommended, as I am out of options.
Thank you, all the best.
poplar last decade
Dear Parakletos,

I took Merc Sol 200C 3 pellets 3 days ago and have nothing much to report on: can't detect neither improvements nor aggravations. The fact is that there might be some improvements, but myself being pretty much despondent and indifferent, maybe I just don't pick on them just yet.
Several moments that have been around for a while now:
1. Still a high level of mental fluctuation.
2. Runny nose and sore throat case might have settled down, but it wasn't that bad before taking medications either.
3. Prespiration quite copious, even when it's winter now and it's cold. Specially soles after waking up.
4. Despair, anxiety and withdrawals when talking, pretty much the same as there was before, just come out in fits randomly.

Those aforementioned symptoms do fit mercurian state alright, I know, but also would like to ask you about these symptoms, do they match Merc as well:

1. I came to understand that I envy and feel jealous towards all people, my family, friends, as they have everything what I lack, I feel being left out and abandoned. (Merc symptom-all people enemies? that would be that?)
2. Apart from stabbing and cutting myself mental images, I do think of shooting myself or cutting nails into my head (through my right temple to protrude all the way)
3. Due to low consumption of food, lacking nutrition and attention, should I look again into psoric miasm?

Any thoughts and opinions would be highly appreciated.
poplar last decade
Hi poplar. :-)

Well .. it may take up to 14 days before you actually 'feel' anything.
It is also quite common that one must take several doses, also go up to higher potency. before the healing energy 'kicks in.'
You have to be patient.;) Wait 4 - 5 days, or if something were to happen, then you can contact me again.
Try to notice all, if any, changes. Energy, specifically. Eating habits, sleep, etc.

Parakletos last decade
Merc';s feeling regarding enemies is not really one of abandonment, it is of attack. They are being beset on all sides by people who are trying to destroy them, destroy what they have built. It is a power struggle against those who would undermine you. You must be alert for the slightest sign of betrayal, you cannot afford to trust anyone. This is a very deep syphilitic feeling that goes beyond the general concept of abandonment.

I agree 3 days is too soon to make any decision about a remedy.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
If I should say something about Mercurius, it must be that Mercurius person has a high sense of righteousness. They are also disciplined people, you may refer to the German people. Especially before the 2nd World War, they were an oppressed people. They worked hard, but it was not the Germans who were left with the profits. This, they felt as deeply unfair, and was probably the reason that Hitler could mobilize such an army. which he did. The most disciplined army, ever.
The German people wanted justice.
Notice also how they built their highways, which they invented. Straight lines, demonstrating their effectiveness, but also their inflexibility.

Another thing is that most people Mercurius, is honest. They pay what they owe, to put it that way.
Suicide and suicidal thoughts, is also indicated. Due to the feeling of failure.
They feel that they do not reach up to its ideals.

Another thing is that most people Mercurius, is honest. They pay what they owe, to put it that way.
Suicide and suicidal thoughts, is also indicated. Due to the feeling of failure.
They feel that they do not reach up to its ideals. But also because, already mentioned, urettferidghet, or the feeling of being unfairly treated.
Mercurius also likes that stuff is clean and neat.

Just some thoughts about Mercurius, a part based on Alfons Geukens recording.
Provides a picture of Mercurius, some traits that are characteristic of this remedy
Parakletos last decade
That is the thing,there are thin lines and to discern feelings from symptoms is really hard. The hardest part is to establish how I feel now against how I have always felt, i.e. general symptoms against today symptoms. I do or did have sensations of attacks coming from people, just not quite sure is it receding and maybe my symptoms have developed into some others, i.e. I was in a Merc status and now it's something else, which I can't really grope. As kindly advised by Parakletos, I will keep an eye on myself and give nuff time and space to see how Merc Sol is being absorbed by me.
poplar last decade

it's been a while. After taking one dose of Mer Sol 200C and more than 2 weeks later:
1. Anxiety unbearable, specially after waking up.
2. Crying fits.
3. Hopelessness, but desire for light-to get better.
4. Mental fluctuation uncontrollable.
5. Suicidal thoughts keep going.
I can't detect any shifting (energy, physical, spiritual) in my fundamentals after a remedy intake.
I am just so tired to live like that, from one anxiety attack to another. Keep thinking about succumbing to alopathy, but only when it really gets bad.
Just don't know what to do...

merry crimbo to everyone.
poplar last decade

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