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Mental confusion and anxiety 2

 

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Prescription for mental confusion and anxiety? Page 3 of 8

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Was there something you mentioned about a nose piercing?
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Yes, I wanted to take hypericum perforatum to tend to an inflamed nose piercing, but I didn't want to do so with out your input, so I didn't.
 
KayLove last decade
Did you get that just before the relapse? The nose piercing may have caused the it. Piercing appears to create 'holes' in the vital energy from what I have noticed over the years in patients. I am not sure why.

Just repeat the Lachesis and we will see if it puts you back where you were.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
No, I got it pierced last May. THank you for asking, as I'd never have known to mention something like that.

I'm writing to report that I took the dose as planned yesterday and today I feel uncommonly upset. I feel picked on by 'everyone,' (my rational mind is immediately suspicious of such impressions of persecution) and so needy and angry with my boyfriend that I have a strong urge to slap and punch him. This is not normal for me. I keep thinking how unacceptable these feelings are, and stifling them, but still aware that they are hurdling themselves against my insides. I am going for a bike ride to remove myself from others.
 
KayLove last decade
This sounds like further aggravation. A good sign the remedy may be working.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Dear K, Again, I would like to request David and you to consider Staphysagria right now. Don't you want to feel well K?

Thanks for asking K. The reason for Staphysagria at this time is to take care of your anger, irritation and the impact of nose pierced last may on your health.

Therefore, please take Staphysagria 200C, daily one dose, for 3 days to iron out your current issues.

A bundle of prayers for your comfortable life.

Regards
Nawaz
 
nawazkhan last decade
Taking a new remedy so quickly while another one is already acting is not appropriate, and can create complications. Wait until we see what the Lachesis does before calling for remedy changes.

A quick aggravation, according to Kents 12 Observations as well as many other authors, is considered a good sign. However, there are other reasons why people aggravate, so we need to wait and see what comes after the aggravation to be sure.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
How long one must wait in this situation?
 
nawazkhan last decade
Long enough for the aggravation to finish - a week is not unreasonable. How long you wait depends on the individual case, what kind of problem you are dealing with. Obviously in acutes you might only wait a single day, or even just a few hours. In chronics, and when there is no danger to the patient, you can easily wait 1-2 weeks.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Thanks!
 
nawazkhan last decade
Hello Doctors,

Wanting to report that, after an emotionally difficult day and a hard time getting to sleep last night, I'm feeling better this morning.

That was really hard! I want to describe the aggravation in more detail in case the information might be useful.

The night following the dose I had a an upsetting dream that one of my younger, beautiful girlfriends had moved herself into my home with me and my boyfriend. My boyfriend told me, 'she makes you look like sh** next to her.' This, of course, is a real fear, a symptom of my issues with jealousy and sense of inferiority.

I was so irritable and indignant all day. I felt persecuted, misjudged, taken advantage of, and like lashing out in response. I was especially angered and hurt when I was looking online for some underclothes - I felt bombarded by images of physically perfect females, images which I had not asked for, and which I perceived as a vicious personal attack on my own physical imperfections. I was very upset about this as I had just been thinking about how pleased I was with my slim, strong body, until these images were 'forced' upon me, making me feel inadequate, self-critical and very angry about it. I felt like smashing the computer, but realizing it would not touch the advertisers responsible, felt a blind rage and powerlessness.

My boyfriend and I argued over money. I felt like he was taking advantage of my generosity. I tried to explain my mixed up feelings, and I felt like he took advantage of my love and need for him, smirking and laughing at my lack of power. This interpretation doesn't make sense since he's not really like that, and usually I would not suspect him of such things.

I spent the majority of the day running errands on my bicycle - trying to work out the emotional pain i was feeling. My legs are so sore today! : )

That night, despite initial sense of exhaustion, it took me forever to fall asleep. Little things kept bothering me and made me want to scream and whimper.

Today, my boyfriend and I are getting along fine and I feel much calmer and trusting of him.

Doctors, I so appreciate the conversation you two have been having about my case. I learn a lot through your dialog and it makes me feel very reassured to benefit from your combined expertise and back and forth questioning. Please receive my enormous gratitude!!!
 
KayLove last decade
Also, I looked at Staphysagria and felt there ARE many symptoms which resonate with me as familiar complaints. I have copied the list to repost here. I erased all symptoms that did not seem to apply to me (or which I didn't understand), left the ones that DO sound like me, and crossed out the ones that distinctly DO NOT sound like me. I hope this information is useful???

The biggest difference that I want to point out is that Staphysagria seems to emphasize sexual excesses and masturbation, while I have been feeling the exact opposite - sexually disengaged and disinterested.

I agree with Dr. David that we can't be clear about what is going on unless I'm careful to take only one remedy at a time. Thus, I will not take anything else until there has been a clear verdict about the Lachesis.

Thank you again for your help, concern, and prayers Nawaz and David!!!



Nervous affections with marked irritability, diseases of the genito-urinary tract and skin, most frequently give symptoms calling for this drug. Acts on teeth and alveolar periosteum. Ill effects of anger and insults. Sexual sins and excesses. very sensitive. Lacerated tissues. Pain and nervousness after extraction of teeth. Sphincters lacerated or stretched.
BETTER, after breakfast, warmth, rest at night.
Worse, anger, indignation, grief, mortification,

mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; impulsive; capriciousness;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; indifference, apathy, etc.;

mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; irritability;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; sensitive, oversensitive; to rudeness;
mind; intellectual faculties; impaired thinking; dull, sluggish;
mind; intellectual faculties; ideas; deficiency of ideas;
mind; restlessness, nervousness;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome); violent;
mind; symptoms follow intense emotions; indignation;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome); at unfairness (indignation);

mind; behaviour; throws things at people; who offend;

mind; symptoms follow intense emotions; anger;
mind; symptoms follow intense emotions; ailments from rudeness;
mind; excitement; ailments from emotional excitement;

mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome);
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome); with indignation;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome); with silent grief;
mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; anger (see irritability and quarrelsome); from suppressed anger; ;

mind; emotions, feelings, attitude, disposition; irritability; morning;
mind; symptoms follow intense emotions; ailments from grief;
Very sensitive as to what others say about her

eye; itching; lids; margin; ;
eye; inflammation; wounds; lids; ;
eye; lids; nodules in lids; edges of lids; ;

eye; growth, tumour; sty;
eye; growth, tumour; sty; indurated (hard from inflammation);
eye; growth, tumour; tumours; glands under eye lids; ;
eye; growth, tumour; tumours; nodules in the lids;


eye; skin around eyes (see face); out-breaks on skin;

Margin of lids itch

nose; running or blocked nose (coryza);

face; skin; out-breaks on skin; cheeks; ;
mouth; teeth; pain;

mouth; teeth; pain; right; ;
mouth; teeth; pain; extending to other parts; ear; ;
mouth; teeth; pain; from cold; from cold drinks; ;

throat; tickling in the air passages; ;

abdomen; pain; after eating (including certain foods);
Desire for stimulants


hemorrhoids, with enlarged prostate.
Diarrhoea after drinking cold water, with tenesmus
Incarcerated flatus

urine; scanty;
genitals; urethra (urinary part of genitals); irritation;

Ineffectual urging to urinate

Pic.) Urging and pain AFTER urinating
Pressure upon bladder; feels as if it did not empty
extremities, limbs; skin; itching; lower limbs; ;
extremities, limbs; perspiration; foot; cold;
sleep; sleeplessness, insomnia; night; sleepy all day, sleepless all night,
sleep; sleeplessness, insomnia; ;
skin; out-breaks on skin; itching;
Night-sweats.
skin; out-breaks on skin; pus-filled pimples;
generalities; weakness (see lethargic, weariness);
generalities; pain; tearing; muscles; ;
generalities; weariness (see weakness);
 
KayLove last decade
Oops - the crossed out items did not translate to this , so I just erased them all together.

Everything I left applies to me.

Also - would it help if I posted a picture of myself? WOuld my physical features give clues about the best remedy for me?
 
KayLove last decade
Hi, So, you have been pretty busy:) Thanks! You are more than welcome.

You may post a pic as it will certainly help.

A bundle of prayers for your happy life.

Regards
Nawaz
 
nawazkhan last decade
Rajan Sankaran, 'Soul of Remedies' STAPHYSAGRIA

They are morbidly sensitive. The effect of this sensitivity is very deep and long lasting. They set for themselves a task which is nearly impossible. That task is to maintain their dignity despite being beaten down, insulted and humiliated. The main feeling of Staphysagria is one of dignity and honour, like a person of noble birth. He feels that he should live up to his sense of dignity and honour (which is often far more than needed in a man in his position). He should not do anything that is undignified, even though others may do so. He should never lower himself to the other man's level (and retaliate by acting as he does). He must never lose his control, since it would be very much below his honour and dignity to do so. If somebody insults him, he has to keep control as befits his noble birth. He cannot lose his temper and become abusive or violent. Were he to do so, he would feel very upset and feel that he had done himself an indignity and this, to him, would be worse than the effect of the insult itself. Hence the sentence in Phatak's Materia Medica: 'Great indignation about things done by others or by himself, grieves about the consequences'. This for me is a very significant sentence. He worries about the effect of such a lack of control on his reputation. The sentence in Phatak's Materia Medica is: 'Very sensitive to what others say about him'. The feeling seems to be that his survival depends upon maintaining a very high reputation and self-control, of being a very superior, calm and dignified person who wins the respect of all by his noble actions... a person who is much above the ordinary.
Staphysagria shares with Aurum a 'Fear of heights, of falling'. He should bear all the humiliations but must not respond or he will lose his dignity.
At a point the Staphysagria person can find it too much to keep the control. He starts to lose it and the first signs are found as the suppressed anger begins to surface:
o Trembling in anger.
o Voice lost during anger.
o Face red in anger.
o Weakness after anger.
o Hemiplegia after anger.
o Anger, throws things away.
o Strike, desire to.

hese are the first signs of losing control. Later, when the situation has become desperate and he feels the demand on him is too much, he may throw to the wind all his reputation and honour, and become the opposite, i.e. a person of ill-repute, who is looked down upon and treated with utmost disrespect. Here we have the rubric: 'Libertinism'. On the physical level, there may be loss of control over muscles. He can get: 'Convulsions from being unjustly accused' (Synthetic Repertory, Vol. II).
Staphysagria imposes on himself a very strict code of honour and is very indignant with himself if he doesn't uphold it. So he has to suppress a lot of his urges, especially in the sexual sphere. He is very timid and cowardly, and has feelings of guilt. He cannot express his increased sexual desire directly for fear of being hurt and out of a sense of shame, and because of his self-respect Staphysagria is not one who can ogle at women. He therefore suppresses his desire and we get the characteristics: 'Dwells on sexual matters'. There is also a prominent tendency to masturbation. To control the anger and the passion - to swallow the ego and hurt - becomes a survival mechanism. This is the situation that can present the maximum problems, for example in the area of sexuality a person intensely concerned with his honour and reputation will be too embarrassed to express his sexuality openly and this aspect will be suppressed, expressed only in his fantasy ('Ailments from embarrassment' and 'Sexual-minded'). But even these fantasies can produce intense guilt and fear in a Staphysagria person, guilt that he is indulging in such fantasies and fear that it may be discovered by others. The whole edifice of honour and reputation that he has built up and guarded will collapse. This leads to an intense state of anxiety, a neurotic anxiety with the feeling that somebody is behind him, and so he constantly keeps looking back. The need to keep perfect control, to live far beyond his capacity makes of Staphysagria a syco-syphilitic remedy. The sycotic aspect is manifested in the reserved, almost secretive nature and the constant apprehension that others might find his weakness, which is the losing of self-control. This need for control is sometimes seen in the struggle to give up smoking.

The main characteristic of Staphysagria is extreme sensitivity and reactivity, both emotionally and physically. If you touch the Staphysagria patient at his sensitive point, which is his honour, reputation and self-respect, there will be an immediate intense reaction though it is often suppressed. Kent writes: 'A man insulted by someone beneath his station could not react outwardly, went home sick, weak and trembling.' Physically too, Staphysagria is indicated in extremely sensitive conditions like a painful surgical scar or a sensitive tooth. In Phatak's Repertory it is the only remedy listed in the rubric: 'Sensitive, morbidly'. Also there is hardening, to cover up the sensitivity as is shown by a tendency to styes and tumours. This sensitivity could only be found in a plant and not in a metal, salt or animal. In its nature it has the softness of a plant rather than hardness of a mineral or the competitiveness of an animal.
In my experience, I have seen that with Staphysagria there can be two extremes, one which has such suppressed emotions where the person will tell that: 'I last got angry seventeen years ago', and the one who cannot control - as Phatak says: 'Violent outbursts of passion', 'Always angry'. The Staphysagria patients we see in practice lie somewhere between these extremes, and the common theme which links them all are matters of honour and respect, and the internal feeling that they have is of a very high reputation to live up to.

Staphysagria can have many fears: fear of being insulted, of being mortified, fear of being killed; he can be afraid even of his own shadow.
I have observed that Staphysagria is very apologetic during the consultation, as if to ward off any rudeness of the physician and to avoid being reprimanded by him. He has anticipation because of sensitivity to hurt. The patients apologize for everything - if they missed their turn in the consultation; or if they have not taken the medicine for a few days and are not feeling better, they usually blame themselves for it. I recall a patient who when entering the consultation room paused and asked if she should leave her slippers at the door. We see here someone who is careful and cautious in finding out what is the norm of the clinic before she does anything, because she does not want a reprimand from me and doesn't want to be admonished. Behind this sensitivity to being reprimanded and being admonished, one can perceive the expression of a delusion, which is that as long as she is following the rules of the person in authority, she is okay. Her perception of reality is that she is always under somebody whom she has to obey and whom she has to follow.
It is as if Staphysagria has made a contract with the rest of the world regarding just behaviour. The problem is, he has signed it, but the world has not.
The situational Materia Medica of Staphysagria is that of a man who comes from an honourable background, but at present is poor or dependent, or under someone who humiliates him. He cannot openly revolt or show his anger since he feels he would be belittling himself in doing so. It is a situation of being unjustly treated by a person on whom he is dependent, so there is:

o The need for justice.
o Egotism.
o Insulted feeling.
o Mortification.
o Suppressed anger.
o Occasional violent outbursts of anger.
But it is not like the rage of Lyssinum with its biting and kicking. It is not a situation of being tormented like Lyssinum but just being treated unfairly, mortified, insulted. It is not something active, not taking a stick and poking the ribs. Telling you to get out creates the Staphysagria feeling, whereas taking a stick poking your ribs three times a day creates that of Lyssinum.
Here I recall the situation of Mahatma Gandhi. He was born in a country ruled by the British, who had a contempt for those with dark skin. However Gandhi showed such nobility and uncompromising dignity that he won the respect not only of his countrymen, being called Mahatma or Great Soul, but also of the very people who oppressed and insulted him. He did this by showing self-control, control on violence and by his rigid persistence with truth and morality.

Harilal, the eldest son of Gandhiji, in my view was in a completely given up state of Staphysagria. He was already born with the Staphysagria state inherited from his father. To add to it he had to live up to a reputation of being the son of Gandhi. He coped well at first, joined the freedom struggle in South Africa and like his father was imprisoned several times. But soon, with the increasing demands on him, both from society and from his father, super-added to an already Staphysagria state, he gave up completely and took to all kinds of bad habits, bringing much dishonour to his family.
I have observed that Staphysagria does not have the attitude of Platinum. He is not outwardly egoistic nor does he put on airs like a king or queen. I have found these persons to be soft, quiet, reserved, often humble-looking, but have strongly felt in their presence the need to treat them with honour and respect. Their sensitivity to being spoken to rudely or to being treated disrespectfully is palpable. This very contrast between their appearance and their sense of honour is the 'indication' that I have used time and again to spot the Staphysagria patients, sometimes in the very first minute of an interview.
Besides Staphysagria, the other c-ancer miasm remedies belonging to the plant kingdom that I know of are Ignatia and Anacardium.
Carcinosinum is complementary to Staphysagria but the Carcinosinum situation is caused by being heavily controlled by the person on whom one depends, whereas that of Staphysagria is caused by being insulted by him.
The other remedy complimentary to Staphysagria is Sulphur. The Staphysagria state is the one in which the person feels humiliated and insulted. Naturally this state will arise more easily in one who originally had pride and egotism than in one who did not. We know that Staphysagria is often followed by Sulphur. In other words a Sulphur state of egotism predisposes to a Staphysagria state of humiliation.
[message edited by brisbanehomoeopath on Fri, 02 Sep 2011 23:01:44 BST]
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Dear K, do you have a 100% match with Lachesis?
 
nawazkhan last decade
Oh goodness! I cannot tell if I am a Staphysagria person from this description - for one, it seems a description that relies on Indian culture as a context - a sense of honor based on self-control is not emphasized in Western culture, and especially not for a female.

There are elements that sound more like my life story, rather than my immediate issues - I am the daughter of someone who demands, and earns, much honor and respect, but denied me the same. He is accomplished, highly successful, highly intelligent, powerful, a tour de force - I grew up struggling for any power and basic respect. When I couldn't get it by pleasing my father, I became totally rebellious - the opposite of the daughter he wished me to be (and who I could never be anyways) - I 'won' by cutting off my nose to spite my face. I have suffered much as a result of my choices and way of coping with my father's authoritarianism, invasion of my privacy, and constant criticism. Growing up I constantly felt dominated and humiliated - in the sense of someone who is stripped naked in front of others and laughed at. Who is told to shut up simply by placing a hand over her face. Instead of submitting I became violently angry and raged against my father in every way. As a child I threw myself at him over and over and over again in an attempt to exert myself, to show him I would not meekly submit. When my father abused me, I abused my little brother. Shamefully, I continued to torment him until the divorce of our parents when I was 12 and he was 9. Then, somehow I forgave him for 'stealing' my parent's acceptance/approval, and he forgave me for years of tyranny. We became close and he has been my best friend ever since.

As a teenager I starved myself, shaved off my hair, took drugs, cut my arms and smeared my walls with blood, and so on.

In elementary school I was not liked by other children and remember in the early grades being so ashamed of myself that I was barely able to whisper my own name when asked for it. Throughout my elementary years I believed that there was something invisible that shrouded me and repelled and disgusted others. I felt that I was the butt of jokes and conspiracies. This only began to resolve after puberty, when I began to attract those who were interested in me sexually. I had few close girlfriends and felt isolated, lonely and self-loathing. I masked all these feelings under a proud, angry persona. Underneath I was terrified of being humiliated. I did not finish middle school because my parents sent me to a survival camp for at-risk youth - which didn't help at all. I dropped out of high school my sophmore year.

Is any of this relevant?

I've worked very hard to get over these feelings, to forgive my father for his mistakes, and even harder, to forgive myself for my own mistakes and misguided attempts to restore my dignity. I've come a long way and my relations with my father are cautious but loving. I no longer behave like a person with an anger problem. I am still proud (if someone with self-esteem issues can be said to be proud??), but I try to temper these feelings, which I consider ego-driven. Recently, when I swept the floor at a nearby restaurant in exchange for the buffet left-overs, I noticed that it was hard on my pride and I was embarrassed when the paying customers saw me, but I also appreciated the experience - because, why should I be too good to sweep the floor for food? Millions of people do these things all the time and I should not consider such things beneath me.

Does this sound like a Staphysagria person? It's very confusing!

I am reluctant to post my photo so publicly, especially the way I'm baring my soul here. I will describe myself, and I would be very happy to send a photo via private email to you doctors.

I am 5'5 and about 125 lbs. I'm Slavic/German and Italian. I have a boyish body - slim, strong, muscular, flat-chested and narrow hips. I tend towards developing powerful limbs, and a fatty pooch under the belly button, though I'm fairly petite. When I gain weight I get it in the stomach and 'spare tire' first. I have always had tons of physical stamina and can walk (or work physically) all day covering many many miles. My feet are always thickly calloused. I have a high pain tolerance. I rarely get sick. I may have had a hormonal imbalance when I was younger - tending away from estrogen and toward androgens, with more body hair (though this has changed) than desired, and secondary sex characteristics that were very slow to develop. I had moderate to severe acne as a teen and into my 20s. I still have a tendency toward break-outs. I lost my period for many years as a teen when my weight dropped below 100 lbs due to starvation and over-exercising. I have a square jaw, high cheekbones, deep-set eyes, and my face is quite angular. My skin tone is very fair with olive undertones and I tan easily. I've got long, plentiful, fine textured hair that hangs to my lower back. At 38 I still look quit young - I'm generally mistaken for someone in her mid or late 20s. My hair is quite grey at the temples (but I cover it with henna).

My nagging physical complaints are: severe bruxism (!!!), insomnia when under pressure, ADD-like symptoms, severe stomach pains after eating wheat (I think), a tendency toward bacterial vaginosis and bladder infections.

Hope all this information is helpful to understanding my case! My apologies if it isn't. Please ask me questions if I can provide better information than what I'm offering here. Thank you very much!!!
 
KayLove last decade
The childhood stuff does not sound like Staphysagria. This is a very animal description - the kingdom themes of domination, control, space being invaded, fighting against someone stronger, jealousy, one-up-manship, rivalry - all point to Animal not Plant.

There are some more interesting expressions and themes appearing though - the invisible shroud, repulsion, disgust, self-loathing, isolation, wearing a mask - I wonder if perhaps you might need a different animal remedy. We can explore that if necessary.

Remedies are never given on the basis of social upbringing - the practitioner has to filter out those things that are explainable by culture and society, to find those things that are individual.

Photos wont help me in any way - I don't decide on remedies on the basis of appearance.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Hello again,

My apologies for the delay in responding to messages and reporting.

I've been fairly constantly feeling irritated and reproachful toward other people. For instance, I went on a day trip with my boyfriend, who did all the packing (so I didn't have to) but forgot a dozen cookies that I baked as a gift for someone who was doing us a favor. Half way to our destination, we realized that we both forgot to pack the cookies. I blamed him and was so furious I could barely contain myself. I kept my anger inside my head, but couldn't speak to him or let it go without great effort. It wasn't until I called home and got my brother to take the cookies to the post office and send them that I started to relax again. I took notes on my feelings as follows:

'Unreasonably upset!!! Angry, indignant, extremely frustrated, wanting to lash out. Feel taken for granted, like someone else should have done something for me that they didn't. Teeth grinding, jaw clenching RAGE. Hair tearing, stab-you-with-a-pen...'

These feelings feel very familiar - they are exactly how I used to feel all the time as a teenager. A few days ago I got really mad when my mother came home and looked at me with an expression that indicated she wished I wasn't doing what I was doing (exercising in her living room). I was instantly enraged, and actually flipped her off with both middle fingers behind her back!!! I haven't done that since high school!!! Too weird.

Later, she got impatient with me and told me that I have too much stuff. I got really defensive, felt criticized and feared that she'd make me part with things I am attached to. I cried and felt very upset with myself. I felt like a burden to her, ashamed of myself, but helpless to change myself for the better.

I went to a second hand clothing store with my aunt. I thought the clothes were overpriced and dated, and I became totally repulsed by the place, could hardly stand being there. I realized the clothes reminded me of my own inability to get rid of old crap that no one wants, and reminded me of old selves I no longer wished to be part of. I felt a kind of snobbish indignation, as someone who looks down on someone else because she actually doesn't like the qualities she has in common with the person.

My period came unexpectedly Tuesday evening. Are some of these feelings because of PMS? I don't usually feel so angry before my period - mostly, I feel weepy and emotional (like tearing up when the music swells during a movie love scene). This time I also had a lot of cramping and pain. My lower back and stomach were in knots. I felt weak, had heartburn, felt like throwing up in the car - all the ways I used to feel when I got my period as a teenager, but haven't felt for at least 10 years.

Today I'm irritated again. I find myself angry because my boyfriend, who is working hard outside to keep our yard nice and isn't even asking me to help him (!), is listening to music that I don't like.

I feel like I'm regressing to a bitchier, more self-absorbed and immature self. Fortunately, I also have a part of me that is constantly standing to the side, observing my feelings and creating some separation from them. While I might feel rage, the voice is still there, saying,'this is not really you - let it pass, don't give in. Just because you feel this way, doesn't mean you have to act on it.'

Thank you for your time, doctors!!
 
KayLove last decade
Dear Nawaz,

I sent you an email with photos of myself. Please check your junk mail if you don't receive it.

Thank you!! K
 
KayLove last decade
Hi K, Thanks for sending the pic's and these are already telling me a lot about your personality and other internal issues.

I would like to again request you guys to take Staph 200c dose asap that is safe during the monthly cycle. Your current symptoms are really calling for this remedy.

Many prayers for your good health.

Regards
Nawaz
 
nawazkhan last decade
Dear Dr.s Nawaz and David,

I've been reading a lot about Staphysagria (per Nawaz's suggestion) and becoming very interested in trying it, because:

1. I've really been feeling bad, not getting along with my boyfriend, and I'm worried that if I keep having such emotional difficulties my relationship will be in murky waters. FOr one thing, the more annoyed I am with him the colder my heart feels. I'm starting to feel withdrawn and having a harder time opening up. He seems to be picking at me too. I'm afraid he isn't happy with me. I'm afraid to go through a break up.

2. Staph is, according to my readings, indicated to help people get 'unstuck' when stuck emotionally behind trauma and romantic disappointment. In the initial intake questions I failed to answer the question 'One situation that had a big effect on you?' because I didn't understand it. Now, I think I know how to answer: Ten years ago I fell deep, deep, crazy, helpless in love with someone. It's the ONLY time I've ever felt so completely, helplessly, totally in love/obsessed, passionately, insanely devoted. He was EVERYTHING to me, and I did everything in my power to love him the way he needed, to keep him, to heal him, to make him happy. He showed me he felt the same about me - for instance, he tattoo'd a big, beautiful, intricate back-piece on his whole back that showed the two of us, naked, submerged in water, hair, legs and arms entangled, surrounded by the word 'euphoria.' His arms had my face, my hair loaded with roses. We were inseparable, and tended to annoy other people with our incessant eye-gazing and mutually obsessive, self-isolating, us-against-the-world behavior. It was so passionate that he could make me orgasm simply by reaching over and drawing me to him. I would have done anything for him. He was explosive and temperamental, and I would take his side always, even attacking anyone who threatened him for any reason. The only problem is that the way he loved me made him so vulnerable and he couldn't handle it. After about 3 years, he got so suspicious of me, and wanted to control me, and I wouldn't let him even though I wouldn't let him go either. He didn't let me have girlfriends or male friends. HE asked me to marry him over and over but something stopped me - I wanted to wait until our violent episodes were resolved. He became abusive - calling me a prostitute when other men looked at me on the street and rushing to attack them physically. If I dressed up nice he'd say I was doing to attract attention from others, but really I just didn't want him to ever lose interest in me. He'd interrogate me for hours and made it my job to convince him of things that one can't ever prove. Sometimes he would turn so mean, sink so low - accusing me of things I'd never do. Sometimes he would choke me or push me down in the mud over and over, and I'd always get up, always fight back, and never stopped loving him fiercely and with my whole heart. Afterwards he'd cry and hold my knees and beg me to forgive him, and tell me that he loved me more than anything, that I was his whole world. These fights hurt so much, but still hurt infinitely less than being separated from him. In the end, he started staying away from me, started lying to me about where he was and I found out he was cheating on me with another woman, who, ironically, actually worked as an 'escort.' When I confronted him about it he said at least he knew who (and what) she was. While he was leaving me I begged him to stay but he insisted it was all my fault. I had done this to myself. I had failed him. I had let him down. I had hurt him. I had destroyed him, and us. I had no pride in front of him, I humiliated myself totally in my desperation. I was on my knees and couldn't breath without him. I let him come back and sleep with me on occasion, since it lessened my pain just a bit, just for a few moments.

When he totally abandoned me, I lost my mind. I had opened myself progressively more and more in response to his demands, his insistence that I wan't giving enough, loving enough, sacrificing enough, proving enough. When I could barely breathe without him, he left. I was in such shock. I couldn't eat, sleep or think. I stalked him, found out where he was living with this woman, waited for hours in his hallways but he never appeared. I cried and screamed and drank incessantly. Me weight dropped to about 100 lbs. I isolated myself, screamed into the floor boards, pleaded with god (and then stopped believing in it), beat my head into walls and then just lay in the dark, exhausted, wishing that a bolt of lightning would turn me to ashes and free me from the constant prison. I was 28, and all my friends all knew me as a crazy person. I was very aggressive, started fights and only felt alive when someone provoked me. I constantly got kicked out of bars. I drank so heavily I would crash my car and pass out in the hallway to my apartment. I actually got kicked out of an abuse survivor's support group because my hysteria was 're-traumatizing' the other women. I had come to see my body as his personal property and could not let anyone else near me for several years, long after he had married the other woman.

I went through an 8 year 'rebound' relationship where I chose a soft hearted older man that resembled the father I'd always wanted but never had. I called him 'Papi.' He loved and babied me, spoiled me, cuddled me, and nursed me back to health, but he was someone I was incapable of falling in love with. I was very attached to him, but not sexually attracted to him and he seemed a safe person to relate to. I knew that someday I'd break his heart, but my own heart had become so cold, I just didn't care. I didn't care about much in general. I did break his heart and I feel a mountain of guilt about it now. He didn't deserve it, and I identify so much with how he must feel. I can't fix it.

Eleven - twelve years later, I've finally begun to bury my pain, but my love and desire has just been replaced with anger and hatred for my first love. I can't forgive him, but I want to purge his memory, everything about him that has ever touched my life, and don't know how to do so unless I find someway to forgive and let go. I feel like I'll never recover from the blow, the shock, the bitter disappointment of this broken love. I'm so angry with myself that I'm not more resilient, that he defeated me so. That I LET him abuse me, that I put myself at his feet, that it was HE that left me a broken mess while he just covered his pain with another woman. I feel such an idiot and I hate myself for allowing it to happen. I wonder what is wrong with me.

I don't think of him every day anymore. He probably still crosses my mind several times a month. Mostly thoughts of him come up when I realize the more I love the one I'm with now, the more nervous I become, afraid I'd never survive such an experience twice. I'm still confused that he was the one I wanted more than anyone, ever. I have a deep mistrust of myself and of others, and even though my partner is very trustworthy I feel like my innocence is gone, and with it my ability to just believe that I'm really safe with any man, ever. My heart is guarded. I still have a deep sadness and regret when I think of that terrible experience. I still would love to punish him. I still wish he'd at least acknowledge how hard I tried. I wish I'd never laid eyes on him in the first place. I feel that he aged me and crushed my spirit. I feel this colors everything I do with a cynicism, a disbelief in my own power and worth, a mistrust in the world. I stopped talking to God, who I no longer believe cares about me in the way I used to naively believe. I no longer believe God cares about anyone, if it exists at all.

COuld staphysagria help me get this demon out? I've lived with this so long. I no longer fight. I'm not aggressive. I accept. I try not to repeat the mistakes I made with that fool. But it still hurts and I want to be free. I'm a very good girlfriend. I picked someone who is much younger and not as clever so that I'm a little safer. I'm a good friend. I'm the best daughter I can be. I do my best, but I'm still scared that it won't make a difference and I'll drop from any great height I should dare to ascend to.

These are such painful thoughts. Thank you for listening.
 
KayLove last decade
I also have been having severe pain in my lumbar region of my back. Yoga helps a lot, but the next day it comes back. It's constant. I think it's because I've been over-training my hamstrings and butt muscles and they're tight, but thought I should mention it anyways.
 
KayLove last decade
That isn't how we understand Staphysagria. I also don't think it is what we understand Lachesis is good for either.

Staphysagria is about Pride and Humiliation. It is about not letting yourself react to situations that create anger, indignation, hurt ego. Staphysagria says 'I will control myself in those situations where I feel humiliated, enraged, criticized' and promptly suppresses their feelings, so that they don't humilate themselves further by losing control. This remedy has no particular relationship to romantic disappointment (above what any remedy can have since it is a common human experience), but certainly some kinds of relationship break ups will activate this specific sensitivity they have. It is important when using a remedy for any reason, to make sure it has a particular connection to the problem, and that the problem is defined enough to be able to match it to the remedy (so 'emotional trauma' describes the majority of problems patients have).

Let me look at what you have written. It is rich with new expressions, issues, problems - I think I can get a more precise prescription for you using it.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
Is there any harm to take a dose of Staph 200C?
 
nawazkhan last decade
Look, in my opinion this seems to go far beyond the power of Staphysagria to heal. However, I cannot predict what it would do if given. I don't believe it is the deepest medicine here, but it may still have an effect.

Kay let me know if you want me to keep working on your case.
 
brisbanehomoeopath last decade

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