odd collection of symptoms please help

SYMPTOMS

1) As of waking up today, twitching in my right eye, the outer corner. Haven't had this for many years and in the past only during exam terms or serious study/stress episodes. My dissertation for my masters is due in in October but the stress hasn't begun too badly yet.

2) For the last few weeks my little toes have been irritating me. They are curled under but lately they have been feeling annoyingly 'caught'. Noticed this most three weeks ago when I returned to yoga after a long time away but now irritating me even as I walk barefoot up the stairs. The left one in particular is irritating, a little painful.

3) White tongue with scalloped tooth marks along the side. I have had this all of my life but have recently realised it is extremely not good and should be dealt with.

4) Sheer exhaustion. I have to work from home because if I go to sleep my brain starts shutting down half-way through the day. My muscles have seriously withered in the last two years.

5) Procrastination. The bane of my entire life. Why can't I study? Why do I avoid it, leave it till the last minute, automatically fall asleep? Why is my ego structure so enthralled with academia. Maybe if I idealised it a little less, I would do better. But hard-work has never been my strength. I have always winged it by virtue of cleverness but obviously that doesn't wash past a certain level.

6) Last night by bunions started hurting in my sleep. I feel like it may have been one side rather than both but I was half asleep so don't remember.

HISTORY/MY STATE OF MIND

Emotionally abusive home, no mother, first break-up the year before last which just floored me in the most spectacular way. I don't think anyone I know has seen anything like it. It was like a small death. I spent most of last year curled up into a ball not moving for agony. But the ensuing grief was not just related to that terribly tragically-timed and miserable relationship (with a man I had idealised but who was nowhere near as good as I hoped he was and as good as he sold himself as - and was in fact downright shady), but to childhood trauma I had heretofore suppressed. I have worked through a lot of those unhappy energies slowly and painfully and am almost home-free! No more anger, no more feelings of vengeance, no more jealousy, no more envy, no more heartbreak, no more sadness, a lot less anxiety. I still miss him, and feel loyal to him at some level which is ridiculous considering his behaviour. But I will deal with that with Cygnus cygnus in due course. No longer languishing but not flourishing yet. Not working to build my own life well enough. Still scared of self-improvement. It was much easier to try and fix him but it was also a cop-out.

SLEEP PATTERNS

I sleep at around 1.30am and rise by about 9.30am. As I am a student this is a little varying now and I find myself getting up later and later. For a long time I was getting up at 9am sharp no matter when I went to bed and earlier this year I was sleeping earlier that 1.30am. More like 11pm. I sleep fine and fall asleep easily but I can tell it isn't deep, restful sleep. It is poor quality. I wake up still a little tired but this has been better since my last two weeks of homeopathy. Still not as good as it could be obviously as exhaustion is still a problem.

DREAMS

Been mostly about my ex-partner. Then I had an affectionate one about him and woke up with the words 'I love you, go be happy wherever and with whomever' on my lips which was new (I had a lot of rage towards him). This was the night before last after taking Acid Nitricum. The night after I dreamt about other people for the first time in a long time.

SENSITIVITIES

I have never liked the cold. There has been a very hot summer in England this year and I find that I don't like the heat either but this is recent. My whole body has been warmer since my break-up, and there has been a lot of flushing in my face which I initially thought was shame but now I am not so sure.

FOODS

Been enjoying warm food and soups for the first time in my life. Usually liked things room temp and never watery things. Increased thirst especially for lemonades and water with lemon in it. Always had a very sweet tooth. Bit better now than it was in my worst emotional states. Plan to take saccharum officinale for this when it arrives from Ainsworth. I like meat too much. Very lazy when it comes to food. Will grab whatever is closest and never cook.

HISTORY OF HOMEOPATHIC TREATMENT

When I was a child I was given lots of homeopathic remedies by my parents but found it irritating and didn't believe in it. Have seen its miraculous effects this year:

-Ignatia Amara 30C irregularly from May onwards
-Took Nux Vomica 6C x 2 on the evening of August 20th. It worked amazingly well even though I vomited and was told to go to A+E. Still my sensitivities re London and its noises and traffic and smog which had become unbearable were so so much better from the next day and since.
-Took Tuberculinum 30C on the evening of August 21st (Broken heart)
- Took Aurum Metallicum 30C on the morning of August 22nd (For emotional weakness and mental strength - my emotions are my kryptonite)
- Took Tuberculinum 30C on the evening of August 22nd
- Took Gelsemium 30Cx2 on the morning of August 25th (then another 30Cx2 later in the morning) [For anxiety]
- Took Platina 30Cx2 on the early evening of August 25th for life-long arrogance
- Took Gelsemium 30Cx2 on the evening of August 25th
- Took Tuberculinum 30Cx2 and Lachesis 30Cx2 on the morning of August 26th
- Took Tuberculinum 30Cx2 in the evening of August 26th
- Took Ignatia Amara 30Cx3 on the morning of August 27th
- Took Ignatia Amara 30Cx3 periodically throughout the day on August 27th
- In the late morning of August 28th, I took 2x30C Merc Viv for possible hyperthyroidism, but certainly life-long mercury temperament
- Later on August 28th, I took 2x200C Natrum Muricatum.
- Later on August 28th, took another 2x Natrum Muricatum.
- Early in the morning of August 29th, I took 2x Mercury Viv.
- Evening of August 29th, I took Anacardium Orientalis 30C x 2.
- Morning of August 30th, I took 2x Calc Phos for studying. Was up and out early.
- Afternoon of August 30th, I took 2x Calc Phos for studying
- 4pm on August 30th, I took 2x Ferr Phos for studying.
- Morning of August 31st, I took two Lycopodium 30C
- Afternoon of August 31st 2X Nat Mur 200C.
- Took 2x Acidum Nitricum 30C in the evening of August 31st
- Woke up on the morning of 1st September and felt good and energetic. I took 2x Argentum Nitricum 30C
- Evening of 1st September I took 2x Calcarea Carbonica 30C
- Before sleep on September 1st 2013, took 2x Acidum Nitricum
- Midday September 2nd 2013, took two Gelsemium 30C

Not a single one of these drugs hasn't worked for the reasons I took them for. They have been a miracle to help me work through layers of emotional grief and upset from my break up. I almost feel back to normal. But as each layer of upset lifts, other little symptoms are released like the ones that bother me above.

OTHER DRUGS

I have started taking probiotics and milk thistle liver pills and pills for candida to try and deal with my white tongue. These are all herbal and from a natural online company in the UK called Higher Nature. Briefly took vitamin B2 pills a week ago to take heat out of my kidneys but stopped quickly when they turned my pee bright neon yellow!

ME

Female, 5ft9', 28 years old, 8 stone, a little on the thin side still. Real history of emotional upsets but they came to fore in wake of relationship and been dealing with those energies for three years now. Most resolved, some still left. First 2.5 years of those three years felt like a living nightmare I couldn't escape from, the last six months have been difficult for other reasons (moving homes several times) and the last two weeks since upping my homeopathic interest have been an absolute miracle. A few niggles left hence this post. My main concern is that I have never been able to study. I have always avoided and silently frozen in the face of academic work which is a shame as I am highly highly intelligent. I just value academia so highly and it is so entwined in my future plans that I just freeze. I can't get that consistency. I just sit and day dream and avoid it and do anything but. Including writing this!!!
[message edited by londontown on Mon, 02 Sep 2013 19:10:23 BST]