The ABC Homeopathy Forum
So no danger of taking numerous similimum doses? Page 4 of 8
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You saying I am in denial doesnt do a thing... because repeatedly I said I regressed 4 months after the 10m dose and now the 200c and 30c didnt feel deep enough to get me out of this state again.
'Been to a homeopath' - counts as that I did something I thought months ago will never be possible. But I did it strangely enough.
ok the rest is just strange and shows you are just wanting to be right or feeling offended by me.
So have nothing more to say.
'Been to a homeopath' - counts as that I did something I thought months ago will never be possible. But I did it strangely enough.
ok the rest is just strange and shows you are just wanting to be right or feeling offended by me.
So have nothing more to say.
starface last decade
And of course, all the projecting of your issues on to other people.
'wanting to be right'
'feeling offended'
Amongst all the other things you project on to the various people you have been in conflict here on the forum. All you, all about you, all you ever see (and talk about) is you.
I doubt you have nothing more to say. You will not be able to help yourself. Your disease will compel you to make more posts, to continuing exposing every little thing about yourself, to keep talking about yourself constantly.
Of course you might apply a little of that will power to stop for a short while, but it won't last long.
'wanting to be right'
'feeling offended'
Amongst all the other things you project on to the various people you have been in conflict here on the forum. All you, all about you, all you ever see (and talk about) is you.
I doubt you have nothing more to say. You will not be able to help yourself. Your disease will compel you to make more posts, to continuing exposing every little thing about yourself, to keep talking about yourself constantly.
Of course you might apply a little of that will power to stop for a short while, but it won't last long.
♡ brisbanehomoeopath last decade
What else could it be than wanting to be right and feeling offended. I dont think people are on my side so they are not helpful.
I like it how people make me uncertain and as always than leave me in this state.
ok despite feeling good at night. And able to sleep without even my mind going on its own with the random dialogues since I am back on platina... I will throw it away. I am feeling hurt and abused by all this. I dont want to hear anything about platina again. If the remedy was right I dont care. If the devil won than so be it. Metaphorically speaking. I dont believe in the devil.
I feel hurt. I dont want to hear anything and no nice talk now either. I am feeling a tight chest with sighing but than something happens from the platina and I just cannot react or feel negative emotions strongly.
Strange. I dont know what to do. hard believing this remedy isnt right. I probably wont throw it away and calm down quickly.
I like it how people make me uncertain and as always than leave me in this state.
ok despite feeling good at night. And able to sleep without even my mind going on its own with the random dialogues since I am back on platina... I will throw it away. I am feeling hurt and abused by all this. I dont want to hear anything about platina again. If the remedy was right I dont care. If the devil won than so be it. Metaphorically speaking. I dont believe in the devil.
I feel hurt. I dont want to hear anything and no nice talk now either. I am feeling a tight chest with sighing but than something happens from the platina and I just cannot react or feel negative emotions strongly.
Strange. I dont know what to do. hard believing this remedy isnt right. I probably wont throw it away and calm down quickly.
starface last decade
I am feeling abused. I am feeling hurt. Usually trouble, like swimming in deep strong emotions. But not the case. Obvioulsy I know this isnt ideal and cure but it is good. Just strange that I still feel the same reactions, just the emotions are under control. They dont get triggered.
starface last decade
immediately I felt so heavy and paralyzing weakness, but emotionally stable. Wonder if the heaviness and paralyzing weakness will go.
You installed doubt yet again, but I am not convinced yet. To many good things from the platina to just dismiss it like that. It would of be foolish. The physichal symptoms of platina fit me aswell... Give me a remedy I should try which would help me or stay quiet. I dont know how to work with my homeopath because i cannot be so open with her about my issues.
You installed doubt yet again, but I am not convinced yet. To many good things from the platina to just dismiss it like that. It would of be foolish. The physichal symptoms of platina fit me aswell... Give me a remedy I should try which would help me or stay quiet. I dont know how to work with my homeopath because i cannot be so open with her about my issues.
starface last decade
i dont know what my issue with the 'truth' is. Why I always have to know it. And can be easily broken because of this whenever there is just a slight chance that my beliefs, views arent the 'truth'.
i lost because of this. because the truth is above everything. And I am not going to be the low small minded person trapped in his mind. my big ego even behind this need for the 'truth'.
Well I dont feel like I lost. Looking for the truth always is not loosing but winning in the long run and meaning I am not the small ego who just wants to be right regardless of who is right or wrong actually.
I always wondered what lac leos sensitivity to truth means. Obviously when I read the symptom list this stood out... the sensitivity for truth in case this means what my problem is.
I would be happy if someone could finally tell me??
no, i am not lac leo
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 08:34:32 BST]
i lost because of this. because the truth is above everything. And I am not going to be the low small minded person trapped in his mind. my big ego even behind this need for the 'truth'.
Well I dont feel like I lost. Looking for the truth always is not loosing but winning in the long run and meaning I am not the small ego who just wants to be right regardless of who is right or wrong actually.
I always wondered what lac leos sensitivity to truth means. Obviously when I read the symptom list this stood out... the sensitivity for truth in case this means what my problem is.
I would be happy if someone could finally tell me??
no, i am not lac leo
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 08:34:32 BST]
starface last decade
remedy suggestion?
if there is so much energy behind telling me I am wrong, on the wrong remedy than a remedy suggestion required, otherwise people might think there is a NOT to correct motive behind all this.
I am in an uncomfortable spot. I dont feel like working with my homeopath because i just dont see what the point is, what is going to be achieved with it, since basically I run the show anyway... but at the same time I am unable to reject her or take someone elses prescription because I know how this would make her feel. Well my projection I guess. It hurts, I have trouble with rejecting people. making them feel not good enough etc. I am not going to do such thing because again this is bigger than me. I am not going to make her feel bad or alone, to feel emotional dissapointment of someone leaving her. I feel guilt over such things.
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:20:10 BST]
if there is so much energy behind telling me I am wrong, on the wrong remedy than a remedy suggestion required, otherwise people might think there is a NOT to correct motive behind all this.
I am in an uncomfortable spot. I dont feel like working with my homeopath because i just dont see what the point is, what is going to be achieved with it, since basically I run the show anyway... but at the same time I am unable to reject her or take someone elses prescription because I know how this would make her feel. Well my projection I guess. It hurts, I have trouble with rejecting people. making them feel not good enough etc. I am not going to do such thing because again this is bigger than me. I am not going to make her feel bad or alone, to feel emotional dissapointment of someone leaving her. I feel guilt over such things.
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:20:10 BST]
starface last decade
Here my issues:
-paralzying weakness, heaviness - can come up just from emotional triggers
- oppression on top of head, as if something pressing down, oppression on chest also
- tension on shoulders, chest, legs, back everywhere anyway
- numb tense face
- haemorrhoids from milk
- issue on my genital. I think infection - from the staphysgaria still
- restless legs at night in bed, sometimes when I sit
- agony in stomach
- paralyzing weakness, heaviness is the worst symptom at this stage, not agony in stomach any longer.
socially I want to be the best. Not the best as in distancing myself from others. I dont want to be distanced. I feel bad when I am better than others. Because I feel their pain than.
Its just best to be distanced I guess. I am not able to feel all those emotional pains and dissapointments from others. Being the best and around people is just going to give attacks or cause emotional discomfort to everyone so no relationships still the best option
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:55:32 BST]
-paralzying weakness, heaviness - can come up just from emotional triggers
- oppression on top of head, as if something pressing down, oppression on chest also
- tension on shoulders, chest, legs, back everywhere anyway
- numb tense face
- haemorrhoids from milk
- issue on my genital. I think infection - from the staphysgaria still
- restless legs at night in bed, sometimes when I sit
- agony in stomach
- paralyzing weakness, heaviness is the worst symptom at this stage, not agony in stomach any longer.
socially I want to be the best. Not the best as in distancing myself from others. I dont want to be distanced. I feel bad when I am better than others. Because I feel their pain than.
Its just best to be distanced I guess. I am not able to feel all those emotional pains and dissapointments from others. Being the best and around people is just going to give attacks or cause emotional discomfort to everyone so no relationships still the best option
[message edited by starface on Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:55:32 BST]
starface last decade
last paragraph in above post is actually the reason i have problems with homeopaths
(knowing better on one hand and/or on the other hand the emotional dissapointment either I get to feel or that I cannot do something because I cannot cause them to feel it. I often dont give people even a chance therefore.
(knowing better on one hand and/or on the other hand the emotional dissapointment either I get to feel or that I cannot do something because I cannot cause them to feel it. I often dont give people even a chance therefore.
starface last decade
is it just me or has my english become much worse over the last few months. It is like I dont give much effort anymore like I used to. The sentence constructions seem wrong.
starface last decade
As I predicted, a string of new posts - 8 of them.
'hard time believing this remedy isn't right' - yes we can all see that, this is the problem we are trying to point out to you. Its not about remedies, it is about you and your attachment to one of them.
Then you go on again about all the suffering, the unhappiness, even physical symptoms. No simillimum would leave you like this.
You are even projecting all your suffering on to the homoeopath now, making up stories about how she is, how she feels. And of course using it as an excuse to avoid her.
If you cannot work with a homoeopath, well you are stuck aren't you? No hope in such an attitude. Change your attitude or stay this way is your choice.
'hard time believing this remedy isn't right' - yes we can all see that, this is the problem we are trying to point out to you. Its not about remedies, it is about you and your attachment to one of them.
Then you go on again about all the suffering, the unhappiness, even physical symptoms. No simillimum would leave you like this.
You are even projecting all your suffering on to the homoeopath now, making up stories about how she is, how she feels. And of course using it as an excuse to avoid her.
If you cannot work with a homoeopath, well you are stuck aren't you? No hope in such an attitude. Change your attitude or stay this way is your choice.
♡ brisbanehomoeopath last decade
I had to talk on the phone with someone from the tax department at work while my mother was listening and coworkers were there. A pretty big deal it would of been in the past. Still of course a bit of anxiety before I got the phone in the hand, but nothing that much. And than once I got the phone it was pretty easy. I like how my communication over the phone has gotten pretty good which was a nightmare before.
To bad it aint like that face to face yet. I still get uncomfortable if I hold eye contact for to long, but big improvements still compared to how it was in the past.
To bad it aint like that face to face yet. I still get uncomfortable if I hold eye contact for to long, but big improvements still compared to how it was in the past.
starface last decade
****
I had an interesting dream. Which surely going to reveal something useful. This is the first dream I had since taking palladium many months ago which had the intensity and feelings of the PALLADIUM experience in it.
... so to make it short. I dreamed of playing soccer again on a big stage. I had many more dreams tonight of same nature.,in some I was playing tennis. or watching other players play their games at times aswell.
So in the soccer dream, I liked to play good as usual. Give effort. Once I brilliantly took the ball from a defender because I knew in advance what move he will do, so i took the ball and than scorred a goal. Later when I once had the ball again, I wanted to repeat the same thing, score a goal again, but my shot was a fluke and was an easy safe for the goalkeeper. This makes me feel bad. Like everyone dislikes me now. Well not happy with me. And thinks 'oh look at how he messed up'. I just dont like that. So this got repeated one more time that I didnt do something that great - another bad shot at goal... and than I got the same intensity and feeling I got while on palladium.... It is this hurt or offence to the core and then I will try even more. So I had the intensity in the dream and just would not accept that I didnt do something good. As if I switch gears and go into overdrive mode. So I was running a lot more after every ball with this intensity in me.
... This pretty much explains why on palladium, while this feeling got triggered I was so intense, lifting weights which I never do, I felt like destroying the weight lifting machine by overworking it (lol) on that day... and why I had this thought of 'nothing will defeat me' while on palladium all of a sudden. It was intense compared to how I usually am.
I had an interesting dream. Which surely going to reveal something useful. This is the first dream I had since taking palladium many months ago which had the intensity and feelings of the PALLADIUM experience in it.
... so to make it short. I dreamed of playing soccer again on a big stage. I had many more dreams tonight of same nature.,in some I was playing tennis. or watching other players play their games at times aswell.
So in the soccer dream, I liked to play good as usual. Give effort. Once I brilliantly took the ball from a defender because I knew in advance what move he will do, so i took the ball and than scorred a goal. Later when I once had the ball again, I wanted to repeat the same thing, score a goal again, but my shot was a fluke and was an easy safe for the goalkeeper. This makes me feel bad. Like everyone dislikes me now. Well not happy with me. And thinks 'oh look at how he messed up'. I just dont like that. So this got repeated one more time that I didnt do something that great - another bad shot at goal... and than I got the same intensity and feeling I got while on palladium.... It is this hurt or offence to the core and then I will try even more. So I had the intensity in the dream and just would not accept that I didnt do something good. As if I switch gears and go into overdrive mode. So I was running a lot more after every ball with this intensity in me.
... This pretty much explains why on palladium, while this feeling got triggered I was so intense, lifting weights which I never do, I felt like destroying the weight lifting machine by overworking it (lol) on that day... and why I had this thought of 'nothing will defeat me' while on palladium all of a sudden. It was intense compared to how I usually am.
starface last decade
^^
I was not correct. The feelings I felt when I had my shot at the goal which was an easy safe for the goal keeper were the all so familiar slight feelings of humiliation
I was not correct. The feelings I felt when I had my shot at the goal which was an easy safe for the goal keeper were the all so familiar slight feelings of humiliation
starface last decade
Today at work this one elder woman who asked me about what I am going to do on the weekend started with that a long conversation we had about me and my issues. In the end it was a nice experience obviously. Just funny how I am able to just talk about my issues with a stranger.
I know what the platina is curing/helping with. It is this... When I am in my low state there is no way I am every going to be able to say anything I talked about today. It would feel like death.
But today it was possible because of the balance. And also I was often anxious or looked liked I am having great difficulty when I expressed a few things but those things feel like 'no big deal' I am not fixated on whether I am appearing anxious to people or not. It is ok to be anxious, life kind of goes on.
When I am not on platina, or a few months after a high potency (once I regress again)... this becomes a big deal again of how bad it is for me if someone sees me be anxious in a conversation etc.
I know what the platina is curing/helping with. It is this... When I am in my low state there is no way I am every going to be able to say anything I talked about today. It would feel like death.
But today it was possible because of the balance. And also I was often anxious or looked liked I am having great difficulty when I expressed a few things but those things feel like 'no big deal' I am not fixated on whether I am appearing anxious to people or not. It is ok to be anxious, life kind of goes on.
When I am not on platina, or a few months after a high potency (once I regress again)... this becomes a big deal again of how bad it is for me if someone sees me be anxious in a conversation etc.
starface last decade
oh yea I am giving her my 'soul of remedies' book next week since I told her about homeopathy and what I am doing. Also going to show her platina is what I am taking right now, what made work possible... funny thing is in the past and I still just slightly feel this... whether this is a low thing to do, what if platina aint my remedy? But I dont care for most part. Who cares. I am showing it and everyone who has something against it. I dont feel like a criminal for going to show her the remedy I am taking... which I usually do, lol.
funny how I am more confident and my ego really in tact and functioning right now at least. I know I know all the low people are going to say this is a proving. But this type of thinking is to simplistic. If people could think deeply like me they could probably come to this scenario of how I see things are. I am about 90% certain.
... if someone did not not boast or do anything because he had a vulnerability to attack, but than took a remedy which made him be able to work, see a homeopath... so gain a bit of confidence, stability etc... so later after a few months he regressed again, so much that on some days he felt the scattered low ego and in danger again. So then if he took just a 30c and 200c potency but reported that the remedy didnt seem to go so deep as to affect his mind again like the high potency did... what do you think is going to happen. If he just feels stability emotionally, no low humiliating feelings and much less the vulnerability to attack.
He is going to be a bit more egoistic at times since he still operating from his disease, no?
I am not proving platina. I know myself well. And this is ridicoulus since I am feeling emotional stability.
Also the claims that I am taking a remedy which is harming me... I would of know if that were the case. This are far fetched ideas and make me think you people need a dose of a remedy to calm your fears... As a matter of fact there is one thing about the platina since yesterday that gave me a warning signal, something I need to observe... Yesterday night and tonight I had the pictures again when I went to bad and closed my eyes. But it was different from when it was bad. (I almost forgot to mention it because I dont see it as a big problem for now.) So Number 1 the pictures not as vivid/detailed. Number 2 I felt emotionaly stable and unable to get afraid. I still slept without ever turning the light on, without waking in the middle of the night, and I was fine with looking around the dark room while in bed. No problem. Just a slight concern of whether the platina is in fact harming me or not. But again I cannot get stressed when I am under platina ever.
SO I will monitor this and stay open whether wrong remedy, or just wrong potency, or whether I am regressing again. I havent taken any new doses since the last 3 200c doses awhile ago.
funny how I am more confident and my ego really in tact and functioning right now at least. I know I know all the low people are going to say this is a proving. But this type of thinking is to simplistic. If people could think deeply like me they could probably come to this scenario of how I see things are. I am about 90% certain.
... if someone did not not boast or do anything because he had a vulnerability to attack, but than took a remedy which made him be able to work, see a homeopath... so gain a bit of confidence, stability etc... so later after a few months he regressed again, so much that on some days he felt the scattered low ego and in danger again. So then if he took just a 30c and 200c potency but reported that the remedy didnt seem to go so deep as to affect his mind again like the high potency did... what do you think is going to happen. If he just feels stability emotionally, no low humiliating feelings and much less the vulnerability to attack.
He is going to be a bit more egoistic at times since he still operating from his disease, no?
I am not proving platina. I know myself well. And this is ridicoulus since I am feeling emotional stability.
Also the claims that I am taking a remedy which is harming me... I would of know if that were the case. This are far fetched ideas and make me think you people need a dose of a remedy to calm your fears... As a matter of fact there is one thing about the platina since yesterday that gave me a warning signal, something I need to observe... Yesterday night and tonight I had the pictures again when I went to bad and closed my eyes. But it was different from when it was bad. (I almost forgot to mention it because I dont see it as a big problem for now.) So Number 1 the pictures not as vivid/detailed. Number 2 I felt emotionaly stable and unable to get afraid. I still slept without ever turning the light on, without waking in the middle of the night, and I was fine with looking around the dark room while in bed. No problem. Just a slight concern of whether the platina is in fact harming me or not. But again I cannot get stressed when I am under platina ever.
SO I will monitor this and stay open whether wrong remedy, or just wrong potency, or whether I am regressing again. I havent taken any new doses since the last 3 200c doses awhile ago.
starface last decade
And I got my older brother in check. Again because of the stability I am feeling and less vulnerability to attack. My brother is a low disgusting person sometimes. It is for this reason only BECAUSE whenever he sees an opportunity to attack, make fun of someone he will try to do so, never check himself or try to hold back and this disgusts me totally... he tried numerous times by now to attack me, but since I have my emotions under control now and intellectually always know how to best respond I am defending every attack of his and turn out the better/higher superior one. Sometimes I feel a bit of sympathy, because of my own projected feelings I guess... when someone does feel like he lost or is not good enough numerous times I just feel sympathy because I know how awful this feels like.
I like it that I am able to defend and not like usual have my emotions come in the way where I feel humiliated and unable to defend myself.Because when I cannot defend
then I have to take the things people did or said and just feel horrible about myself for being unable to do anything about it
[message edited by starface on Fri, 13 Apr 2012 05:03:02 BST]
I like it that I am able to defend and not like usual have my emotions come in the way where I feel humiliated and unable to defend myself.Because when I cannot defend
then I have to take the things people did or said and just feel horrible about myself for being unable to do anything about it
[message edited by starface on Fri, 13 Apr 2012 05:03:02 BST]
starface last decade
well my brother is pretty fed up with me by now. My mouth to strong as of recently. he just never gets an inch against me. Every debate or opinion he ends up getting trumped by me. He hates my mouth he said.. in a joking way though. lol. Thats just how I am unfortunately
starface last decade
... I wonder what he would of have to say if he were at home while I take a dose of palladium... while I am feeling an intensity and force. Then I am mad like michael schumacher probably lol. Something driving me to HAVE to win in a totally diseased way.
starface last decade
So now you are trying to convince other people in your life you are platina, people with no knowledge of homoeopathy.
I see the denial and repression is getting stronger. What's next, will you start giving speeches to people, do a TV show maybe? 'The Proof that I am Platina' show. You would do it on some community tv station, they let people do all sorts of weird stuff there.
This isn't a proving, this is your disease getting stronger and stronger, spilling out further into your life.
And look at all the same words appearing all through your posts - low, criminal, ego, boast, attack, vulnerability, stability, disgusting, humiliated, defend, better, high, superior - man you are in an intensely active remedy state. Even trying to prove us all wrong, you continue to overtly display how sick you are.
Stability is a disease word - you don't even seem to realise that. Stable is a keyword of column 10 in the periodic table - you keep using the word like it proves you are well. It doesn't. In fact because you connect it up to a whole lot of clearly unhealthy words, it is obvious that 'stability' is actually another sick word for you. You associate it with Ego amongst other things, and Ego is one of your favorite disease terms.
I suspect with how strong your disease is becoming, the pathology won't be far behind. I wonder what you will do then.
I see the denial and repression is getting stronger. What's next, will you start giving speeches to people, do a TV show maybe? 'The Proof that I am Platina' show. You would do it on some community tv station, they let people do all sorts of weird stuff there.
This isn't a proving, this is your disease getting stronger and stronger, spilling out further into your life.
And look at all the same words appearing all through your posts - low, criminal, ego, boast, attack, vulnerability, stability, disgusting, humiliated, defend, better, high, superior - man you are in an intensely active remedy state. Even trying to prove us all wrong, you continue to overtly display how sick you are.
Stability is a disease word - you don't even seem to realise that. Stable is a keyword of column 10 in the periodic table - you keep using the word like it proves you are well. It doesn't. In fact because you connect it up to a whole lot of clearly unhealthy words, it is obvious that 'stability' is actually another sick word for you. You associate it with Ego amongst other things, and Ego is one of your favorite disease terms.
I suspect with how strong your disease is becoming, the pathology won't be far behind. I wonder what you will do then.
♡ brisbanehomoeopath last decade
I dont feel my disease strong. BDD is not in the way of my living. Around people I am not feeling low and in danger. I can work and am more talkactive. at home I am just jholding my ground against my brother and parents. not going overboard with it. Maybe a little
I am not feeling cured by any means though. Today I am feeling a bit 'dreamy' again. If I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible it feels 'dreamy' to me.
This is a bit confusing. I took the 30c and 200c and immediately on the first day of it I felt much better at night and now this. That I am feeling a bit to open again. How could I get closed and now opened again. And even more so I still felt fine and could sleep in the dark tonight.
a bit uspecting that platina maybe really not right.
I am just showing her the remedy which helped me. That is all.
so hmm I dont know anymore. I guess I wont take any more doses. But what than if I get to feel so bad at work again soon maybe
I am not feeling cured by any means though. Today I am feeling a bit 'dreamy' again. If I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible it feels 'dreamy' to me.
This is a bit confusing. I took the 30c and 200c and immediately on the first day of it I felt much better at night and now this. That I am feeling a bit to open again. How could I get closed and now opened again. And even more so I still felt fine and could sleep in the dark tonight.
a bit uspecting that platina maybe really not right.
I am just showing her the remedy which helped me. That is all.
so hmm I dont know anymore. I guess I wont take any more doses. But what than if I get to feel so bad at work again soon maybe
starface last decade
its no red alarm yet. Just something I am noticing. How could this remedy have helped me in so many ways but not be similimum. Everything. even with inapropriate sexuality etc. At work around midday I am also feeling so hungry now every day because my stomach feels better which I usually dont etc.
is this an aggravation just maybe? a swing, probably not
is this an aggravation just maybe? a swing, probably not
starface last decade
am I gona die? lol, but I am a bit afraid. Will this go away soon? The fear is just as always that it might get worse. So dont be negative please coz this aint going to help at all. I have not taken any new dose.
starface last decade
its all good. Just an overreaction. Maybe its because I slept only 6 hours and on some other days even less. Sleep affects this often.
starface last decade
Disease is not just one symptom or even set of symptoms. BDD goes down, Ego goes up, Vulnerability goes down, Disgust goes up - it is all part of one disease that infects every part of your being and your life. It doesn't matter that one part goes quiet if another part gets noisy. Same disease, manifesting in different parts of you at different times, but all still the same diease continuing to run as before.
See you are suffering from the same problem all the other poorly trained prescribers suffer from, an inability to perceive or recognize the totality of the case. So you look at one little bit and go 'hey its better' and you look at another little bit that is worse and go 'hey there is something unconnected'. It's all just an incomprehensible mish-mash of symptoms that make no sense to you. It is exactly what Hahnemann warned about in the Organon and in Chronic Diseases.
'I am not feeling low and in danger (denial shows that you are feeling that); 'I am just holding my graound against my brother and parents (deep disturbance manifesting in feelins of paranoia)'I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible' (visual hallucinations)'I am feeling open again. How could I get closed and now be open' (more non-human language I suspect, since human beings don't open and close) - yet more signs that your disease is continuing to manifest unabated.
See you are suffering from the same problem all the other poorly trained prescribers suffer from, an inability to perceive or recognize the totality of the case. So you look at one little bit and go 'hey its better' and you look at another little bit that is worse and go 'hey there is something unconnected'. It's all just an incomprehensible mish-mash of symptoms that make no sense to you. It is exactly what Hahnemann warned about in the Organon and in Chronic Diseases.
'I am not feeling low and in danger (denial shows that you are feeling that); 'I am just holding my graound against my brother and parents (deep disturbance manifesting in feelins of paranoia)'I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible' (visual hallucinations)'I am feeling open again. How could I get closed and now be open' (more non-human language I suspect, since human beings don't open and close) - yet more signs that your disease is continuing to manifest unabated.
♡ brisbanehomoeopath last decade
ok thanks.
but a few clarifications needed, especially the one about how I see my face at the bottom last sentence. I wasnt clear with it.
'BDD goes down, ego goes up'
my ego is not bigger. It is the same. Before my ego had the vulnerability to attack. Now it just less afraid of it. More confidence and overconfidence at time therefore.
- 'I am not feeling low and in danger'
I had no ida how to describe it, as to what it is better since the 10M dose. But than once I regressed I knew it. And now that the 200c hasnt affected my mind level I am still half way operating from disease. Without the platina I could not work. Now I can. I gave the mercury a chance while I was on it and just regressing. And 3 or 4 days later I thought it is working. I felt lighter and good in the kitchen, but guess what. One thing went wrong, which was that I worked overtime in the kitchen and thought I am unable to stand up for myself and say I am leaving work , not going to work overtime like I dont need to if work is not finished... so I got fixated on this and it depressed me. With being stable and emotionally feeling more balanced and unstuck - this is what I mean. On the platina I dont have ever such depressing moments. Even when this pretty girl came to work 2 days ago and saw her while feeling so worthless and insignificant in her presence... I simply could not obsess about it and get depressed. The emotional charge much much less and this happens only on platina. Still a bit of unhappiness but 80% better than how I would usually respond to such events if not on platina.
-'I am holding my ground against my brother and parents'
well I am not letting myself be treated in the same old way by them, which is bad. My family is attacking,. We are like that to each other. It is like this for example... I come home, just make myself to eat because I am so hungry from not having any breaks or anything to eat while at work.. so I come home make myself to eat... than while I am eating my mother comes home, walks into the kitchen, sees a bunch of cleaned up dishes at the sink and starts complaining that I did nothing while coming home in this annoying angry tone.... I totally cannot stand this and with holding my ground I mean. I am more confident now, know that this is totally unacceptable how she is behaving. At work all nice to everyone with a happy face. The moment she steps into our house she is negative, and just like a child. At work everyone is always polite and friendly so I am just not putting up with such behavior at home any longer. And immediately told her to not start again with this crap, I just came home from work a minute ago and only made myself something to eat which I am still eating and not going to listen to any crap that I have done nothing around the house... this is holding my ground. The same with my brother, whenever he sees something to attack me for he will do it. Only now that I am not feeling humiliated and afraid by the attack which makes me unable to defend. I respond now in a good manner. With my brother it is that I show myself being non reactive most often. When we debate or share opinions about something it is just that my confidence and manner which is that I know what is right, how things are is just to strong, it sounds to convincing. So he feels fed up with this how he is always on the loosing end and never can change my position on something. That in the end my view and opinions stay or win in the end.
'I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible'
This is not how I meant it. I have 0 hallucinations. Even the auditory stuff I had while going to sleep a few weeks ago (I had none while on platina again) I would not call hallucinations, because isnt hallucination something that you think is real? I have no issues with that. I am cmpletely aware it is my tired mind, not real, that it is not some person or my mother really having a conversation now. So this stuff is just annoying and on the other hand making me afraid of what this means. Whether some serious problem or not really a problem
So what I meant is when I looked at my face into a reflection of my glossy LCD screen. It was from the sun shining at it from an angle that made my face half bright and other half of it was dark. And so the darkness, of my face just partially being bright while there was a lot of darkness around made me feel 'dreamy'. What this means is that I feel like in a dream state. And this is probably from the darkness.
SO no hallucinations. at all
'disgust'
My self disgust is much down ever since platina and only reason why my BDD is much better.
The disgust for other it is the same. I am just mentioning it now because I am not afraid at the same level. I always feel disgust when someone acts low. I felt it for allicando months ago when she was critical of me months ago. I am just mentioning disgust now, because it heightens me when I mention this (lol). A few months back in an argument on here I would feel anxiety, humiliating feelings, fear of attack. Now I dont. Now I am more egoistic therefore and feel less vulnerable to attack.
****
Ok I went to bed, no pictures when I closed my eyes. I fell asleep and now I feel much better.
Still hard to believe if platina not my remedy, how this could be possible? How I dont even walk daily outside any longer for months, which was my life before and staring in the mirror. Just today I thought about how come I am not feeling the need to walk outside to be around people like I used to. And I thought about whether this is bad or not today for a short while. Even before I started working I did not go out for my constant many daily walks.
I dont know. All symptoms physichal and mental point to it in my view. The results are here which are widespread. I would just be completely blank and have no idea how to present my problem if platina not my remedy. I cant remember what I used to say would the problem if platina not my remedy. Dont know whether it is just because I woke up. Umm it was that I felt I want be visible I think. Well now I would of be blank and just not understand anything. My certainty level would go
I am going to monitor this 'dreamy' feelings for a while. If they come back or become more prominent. Obviously I would stop with the platina than.
The paralyzing weakness, the numb face, the over sexuality and fetishes,the ego of where I distance myself from people, the swing of high and low, the stuff about whether I am able to defend myself or not, the special feelings I usually have... And I started having them the moment I started working to a big degree. Because this is my way of how to cope and on those days I remembered this is how it was like when I was in highschool aswell, but I forgot about it. That is why I never mentioned it in homeopathic treatment before I started working again.
I just dont know how it can be anything else but platina. And than there are the results.
[message edited by starface on Fri, 13 Apr 2012 08:58:29 BST]
but a few clarifications needed, especially the one about how I see my face at the bottom last sentence. I wasnt clear with it.
'BDD goes down, ego goes up'
my ego is not bigger. It is the same. Before my ego had the vulnerability to attack. Now it just less afraid of it. More confidence and overconfidence at time therefore.
- 'I am not feeling low and in danger'
I had no ida how to describe it, as to what it is better since the 10M dose. But than once I regressed I knew it. And now that the 200c hasnt affected my mind level I am still half way operating from disease. Without the platina I could not work. Now I can. I gave the mercury a chance while I was on it and just regressing. And 3 or 4 days later I thought it is working. I felt lighter and good in the kitchen, but guess what. One thing went wrong, which was that I worked overtime in the kitchen and thought I am unable to stand up for myself and say I am leaving work , not going to work overtime like I dont need to if work is not finished... so I got fixated on this and it depressed me. With being stable and emotionally feeling more balanced and unstuck - this is what I mean. On the platina I dont have ever such depressing moments. Even when this pretty girl came to work 2 days ago and saw her while feeling so worthless and insignificant in her presence... I simply could not obsess about it and get depressed. The emotional charge much much less and this happens only on platina. Still a bit of unhappiness but 80% better than how I would usually respond to such events if not on platina.
-'I am holding my ground against my brother and parents'
well I am not letting myself be treated in the same old way by them, which is bad. My family is attacking,. We are like that to each other. It is like this for example... I come home, just make myself to eat because I am so hungry from not having any breaks or anything to eat while at work.. so I come home make myself to eat... than while I am eating my mother comes home, walks into the kitchen, sees a bunch of cleaned up dishes at the sink and starts complaining that I did nothing while coming home in this annoying angry tone.... I totally cannot stand this and with holding my ground I mean. I am more confident now, know that this is totally unacceptable how she is behaving. At work all nice to everyone with a happy face. The moment she steps into our house she is negative, and just like a child. At work everyone is always polite and friendly so I am just not putting up with such behavior at home any longer. And immediately told her to not start again with this crap, I just came home from work a minute ago and only made myself something to eat which I am still eating and not going to listen to any crap that I have done nothing around the house... this is holding my ground. The same with my brother, whenever he sees something to attack me for he will do it. Only now that I am not feeling humiliated and afraid by the attack which makes me unable to defend. I respond now in a good manner. With my brother it is that I show myself being non reactive most often. When we debate or share opinions about something it is just that my confidence and manner which is that I know what is right, how things are is just to strong, it sounds to convincing. So he feels fed up with this how he is always on the loosing end and never can change my position on something. That in the end my view and opinions stay or win in the end.
'I see my face in the dark with only some parts visible'
This is not how I meant it. I have 0 hallucinations. Even the auditory stuff I had while going to sleep a few weeks ago (I had none while on platina again) I would not call hallucinations, because isnt hallucination something that you think is real? I have no issues with that. I am cmpletely aware it is my tired mind, not real, that it is not some person or my mother really having a conversation now. So this stuff is just annoying and on the other hand making me afraid of what this means. Whether some serious problem or not really a problem
So what I meant is when I looked at my face into a reflection of my glossy LCD screen. It was from the sun shining at it from an angle that made my face half bright and other half of it was dark. And so the darkness, of my face just partially being bright while there was a lot of darkness around made me feel 'dreamy'. What this means is that I feel like in a dream state. And this is probably from the darkness.
SO no hallucinations. at all
'disgust'
My self disgust is much down ever since platina and only reason why my BDD is much better.
The disgust for other it is the same. I am just mentioning it now because I am not afraid at the same level. I always feel disgust when someone acts low. I felt it for allicando months ago when she was critical of me months ago. I am just mentioning disgust now, because it heightens me when I mention this (lol). A few months back in an argument on here I would feel anxiety, humiliating feelings, fear of attack. Now I dont. Now I am more egoistic therefore and feel less vulnerable to attack.
****
Ok I went to bed, no pictures when I closed my eyes. I fell asleep and now I feel much better.
Still hard to believe if platina not my remedy, how this could be possible? How I dont even walk daily outside any longer for months, which was my life before and staring in the mirror. Just today I thought about how come I am not feeling the need to walk outside to be around people like I used to. And I thought about whether this is bad or not today for a short while. Even before I started working I did not go out for my constant many daily walks.
I dont know. All symptoms physichal and mental point to it in my view. The results are here which are widespread. I would just be completely blank and have no idea how to present my problem if platina not my remedy. I cant remember what I used to say would the problem if platina not my remedy. Dont know whether it is just because I woke up. Umm it was that I felt I want be visible I think. Well now I would of be blank and just not understand anything. My certainty level would go
I am going to monitor this 'dreamy' feelings for a while. If they come back or become more prominent. Obviously I would stop with the platina than.
The paralyzing weakness, the numb face, the over sexuality and fetishes,the ego of where I distance myself from people, the swing of high and low, the stuff about whether I am able to defend myself or not, the special feelings I usually have... And I started having them the moment I started working to a big degree. Because this is my way of how to cope and on those days I remembered this is how it was like when I was in highschool aswell, but I forgot about it. That is why I never mentioned it in homeopathic treatment before I started working again.
I just dont know how it can be anything else but platina. And than there are the results.
[message edited by starface on Fri, 13 Apr 2012 08:58:29 BST]
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