10 month old not sleeping through the night

Hello,
So I'm filling out as much info as I can from the questionnaire, of course being as my son is only 10 months some questions won't apply so I am omitting them. Hopefully this is sufficient information for you!

1] Your Complaint:
My son, Kody, who is 10 months old this week, wakes up every 1 or 2 hours at night. He is exclusively breastfed, and looks for comfort in nursing to fall back asleep. He generally wakes a total of 6-10 times a night, and has done that since the day he was born. Sometimes we'll get lucky and get a longer stretch, maybe one stretch of 3 or 4 hours, followed by waking every hour, etc. But primarily it is every 1-2 hours. When he wakes, it is when he hits the light sleeping phase of sleep, after being in the deeper sleep for about an hour. He will toss and turn first, then start whimpering, then sit up and start crawling toward me or cry for me. We bed share, so he sleeps right next to me in our bed. I have tried everything I could think of to eliminate it being due to discomfort---too hot or cold, hungry, pain, etc---so as far as I know it doesn't seem to be any of those things. Nothing really seems to help or make a difference. I have tried doing 'cry it out' but he is very stubborn and just cries for 2 hours, falls asleep for 20 minutes, then wakes up to cry again. So since I'm getting more sleep from just responding to him, I just do that but it's pretty tough to function during the day.
Once in a great while, he will wake screaming, and I can't seem to soothe him. He cries and refuses to nurse, and continues to cry even while I am rocking him and shushing and trying to soothe. Eventually for whatever reason he settles down again and will nurse back to sleep.

If it helps to know, his big brother, Ethan, was the very same as him--woke 8-10 times a night for the first year, then maybe 5 times a night till the second year, then less and less until he finally slept through the night at 4 years old. My mother tells me that I also was a very poor sleeper as a child---very fussy during the day, and very difficult to get to sleep at night, then waking often during the night as well. Around 3 years old they found I had double kidneys and double ureters on both sides, and was getting constant UTIs. Ethan had no kidney abnormalities that they found on imaging, and doesn't seem to have any urinary complaints. Kody has had dilated kidneys since before birth, due to a stricture at the base of the ureter on his left side. He also had an undescended testicle on that side that was corrected surgically one month ago. At that time they found bilateral inguinal herinas that were repaired as well.


CHILDHOOD HISTORY
I'll give my pregnancy history as well, for what it might help.
I was a high-risk pregnancy with Kody, due to having had a history of a blood clot in the lung about 6 months prior to conceiving him. That was at the time I had a miscarriage and hemorrhaged really badly to the point of needing a couple units of blood and an emergency D&C to stop the bleeding. They never did find out why the blood clot---they tested me for clotting disorders and found nothing. They wanted to have me on anticoagulants during Kody's pregnancy but I was able to talk them out of it. Around 19 weeks gestation, they found that he seemed to have double kidney on the left side. The right was single, but dilated. So I got monthly ultrasounds from that point until delivery. (recently they found that the left kidney is actually single, but has a narrowed ureter down near the bladder.) I also was on antidepressants throughout the pregnancy. Wellbutrin. I also was taking Atenolol, a low dose of 12.5 mg daily, because whenever I'm pregnant I get a periodic tachycardia that interferes with me being able to function.
I had a lot of anxiety, fear, and stress during the pregnancy. I was afraid I was going to lose him because of the prior miscarriage.
The delivery was pretty uneventful, it was unmedicated and not augmented. I had prodromal labor for several weeks, he was about 5 days past his due date (which I know is just an approximation anyway), and once actual real labor started, he was born within about 3 hours. His face was bruised in a couple of places when he came out. Otherwise seemed ok and has also been adjusted by the chiropractor fairly recently.

After birth/earlier in infancy:
He seemed to be a poor nurser from the beginning...having a difficult time getting an adequate latch. It was very frustrating for me at the hospital to the point where I called the nurse and asked her to feed him some formula for me so I could just get some sleep. I probably only slept about 8 hours total in the first 3 days of his life, and it wasn't for lack of trying! I did visit with family some while he was sleeping but primarily, he just woke a lot and would wake up just as I was drifting off.
He was still having difficulties with latching and nursing effectively about 2 or 3 months of age.
He was very fussy from day 1. As time went on I realized he seemed exactly like his older brother (Ethan) was, who we figure had reflux (GERD). Kody never has spit up much, but I could hear him urp up in his throat, and then swallow it back down. Then he would start to cry. He also about 2 months in, started to be really fussy about eating, would show hunger cues and then root for the breast but then cry and turn away. Arching his back at feedings, crying, needing much distraction and motion to be able to latch on. At one point he would only eat if he was just starting to wake up from sleep, and refuse all other times. We did all the regular meds, not knowing there were any other options---because of course regular doctors don't tell you about homeopathics. We tried Zantac, Prilosec, Prevacid, and Nexium, all in about 4 months' time, with little success. Then in desperation I started googling reflux treatments and came across the Nat Phos remedies.
It took a bit of tweaking and some ideas from helpful folks on here, but what ended up working for him was 1 teaspoon per day of chamomile tea, diluted with equal amount of water. I would get his remedy ready in the morning, of the tea, and 5 tablets each of Nat Phos 6x and Mag Phos 6x, dissolved in the tea, shaken, and then I'd give small amounts of that throughout the day, trying to aim for 5 times a day, starting with first thing in the morning and last dose right before bed. After about a month doing that he was so much better during the day than he ever was on meds. He was calm and quiet, playing quietly and not needing held all day long to keep him from crying. He was going for long car rides in his car seat without screaming. However, his sleep has never improved. It did get slightly better, I should say, because when his reflux was the worst, he would wake every single hour all night long. 12 hours sleep, 12 + wakings in that time. With the homeopathics, it was (and now is) 5-10 times a night, so some improvement but not much.


S L E E P

1] Usually Kody falls asleep on his side, nursing, with me side-lying next to him. He curls his body into mine. Then I will sneak away when he is asleep enough. Often he will end up rolling onto his back or his stomach to sleep. Seems about half and half which one of the two it is. He also does something across between his side and stomach, with his arm and leg on one side sprawled across the bed.
He tends to 'follow' me across the bed in his sleep, will try to snuggle up next to me so he is touching me if I roll away from him.

2] During sleep do you:
a) Snore? No
b) grind teeth? Not that I've noticed.
c) Dribble saliva? Sometimes, but not profusely.
d) Sweat? Occasionally when the room gets too warm
e) Keep eyes or mouth open? Mouth open sometimes
f) Walk? Talk? I don't think so.
g) Moan? Weep? Yes he moans a lot or makes complaining/whining noises. Cries if I do not attend to him when he is complaining.
h) Become restless? Wake up with a jerk? Yes is restless whenever he gets into the light sleep phase. Wakes up slowly, but sometimes will wake up with a jerk and start crawling across the bed before his eyes are quite open.

3] Describe if anything else is unusual about your sleep: (sleepy, sleeplessness, etc. if so when?) He fights sleep very hard. When it is time for sleep, whether nap or bed, he is restless, while nursing and trying to fall asleep he is in constant motion with a hand or an arm, playing with my hair if content or yanking it if frustrated. Playing with his own hair, scratching the sheets to make noise with his nails, kicking his feet, pulling his ear, rubbing eyes, etc. Sometimes he goes peacefully to sleep but most times he will nurse, start to slow down and get quiet, close his eyes, then seem to get frustrated in his movements and be more jerky and then wake up and want to get up and crawl away even though I can tell he is still tired. Often he seems to have dark circles under his eyes during the day so I know he needs more sleep.
Usually I can persuade him back to the breast and get him settled to sleep, but not without a lot of bother and work on my part. It's like he is diametrically opposed to sleep, but I can softly 'woo' him if I work at it, to distract him long enough to forget to fight it and eventually he falls asleep.

APPETITE AND THIRST

1] How is your appetite? He eats very often throughout the day, mostly breastfeeding. He prefers to nurse in short bouts of maybe 5 or 10 minutes max, and eats perhaps every 1-3 hours during the day, about the same as night. I would say he probably takes in an equal amount of calories day and night, and he is not overly chubby. He looks very proportionate and like he is a good weight for his age and length.
2] When are you hungry? About every 1-2, sometimes 3 hours.
3] What happens if you have to remain hungry for long? He gets progressively more fussy and discontented.
4] How fast do you eat? Seems to eat at a regular pace...not gulping his food or taking a long time to finish, unless it's solid foods. Then he eats very slow, for example a small piece of bread (that fits in his hand) he will suck on for maybe 5 minutes and then swallow part of it. Sometimes he will gag on it, even though it is very soft and squishy from sucking on it so long.
5] How much thirst do you have? Seems normal, as far as I can tell.
6] Any particular time are you especially thirsty? If it's been an hour or two since he nursed last, he seems to be thirsty as he will grab for my water glass if he is sitting by it.


Food/Drink likes and dislikes, and how strongly
He gags easily with solid foods. I have not had much luck getting him to take table foods with any regularity. He seems interested in what we are eating, but then gags on most foods and then doesn't want them anymore. He sometimes will take purees or baby foods but sometimes will completely refuse them (usually when teething, ear infection, etc). He enjoys drinking from a cup and will take juice, water, or smoothies from a cup. As for solids, he can eat soft things like bread or bananas but refuses much else. The majority of his calories come from breast milk.

STOOL
1] Do you have any problem regarding your stools? One thing I've noticed, many times when he is eating, he will strain and bear down, and sometimes complain a bit, as if he has gas or needs to pass a stool, but then nothing comes out. He seems uncomfortable and will stretch his legs straight out, or get up and roll around on the bed as if trying to get gas out.
2] When and how many times a day do you pass stools? Usually in the morning, about every 2-3 days

4] Do you have any problem about bowel movements? Doesn't seem to. Passes them no problems
5] Do you have to strain for stool? Even if soft? Somewhat. Usually he doesn't strain that I notice, but occasionally I can hear him grunting. His stool is always soft though.
6] Do you have belching or passing gas? Describe its character. Usually both of those pass without complaint for him, but like I described above, sometimes when eating he seems to have some sort of intestinal discomfort.
7] How do you feel after passing gas up or down? Seems to feel better.


URINATION & URINE
1] Any problem about urine? Seems like he is able to hold it for a long time, sometimes longer than I think he should, for example 4+ hours during the day. Most days though he has frequent wet diapers so that I don't worry about him. He makes a lot of urine at night, because of his frequent nursing, so I use diaper doublers to keep him dry at night.
2] Any strong smell? Like what? In the morning his diaper smells strong, like 'morning pee' I suppose, but nothing that seems alarming.
3] Do you have any trouble before, during and after passing urine? Doesn't seem to.
4] Any difficulty about the flow? Slow to start, interrupted, feeble dribbling etc.? The few times I've seen him pee with no diaper, he seems to have a nice strong stream to it.


SWEAT/PERSPIRATION-FEVER-CHILL
1] How much do you sweat? Not overly much, although the last few weeks I seem to have a hard time gauging how warmly to dress him at night.
2] Where and on what part do you sweat the most? His head sweats the most when he is overheated. His scalp around the temples primarily and sometimes upper lip.
3] Do you perspire on the palms or soles? Occasionally his socks will be damp in his shoes if he gets too warm. His hands do seem sweaty or clammy often, but then he also sticks them in his mouth a lot too, so it's hard to tell what is drool.
4] Is the sweat warm, cold, clammy, sticky, musty, greasy, stiffens the linen etc.? Warm and wet when he is overheated, occasionally cold/clammy. It does seem to stiffen the sheets very slightly when it dries.
5] What is the smell like? Just smells salty like normal sweat, nothing out of the ordinary.
6] What color does it stain the clothing? Doesn't seem to stain, that I can tell.
7] Is the stain easy to wash off or difficult? Easy
8] Any symptoms after sweating? Unknown
9] When do you get fever or chill? He gets chilled on his extremities or exposed parts when the room temperature gets cool. He seems to run just slightly on the cool side of normal as for his 'thermostat'. His brother is hot-blooded and likes to wear very little clothing, regardless of the room temperature, but Kody I have to dress warmer than that to keep him warm. I dress him just a slight bit more warmly than I dress myself and that seems to be right for him.

CHEST-HEART – COLD – COUGH
1] Do you catch cold often? If so, how often? Over this winter he was sick frequently, but usually he seems to get sick pretty rarely. This winter though he seemed to be catching one bug after another. He only recently got well and then now he is cutting two upper teeth (eyeteeth) and is recovering from a possible ear infection.
2] Describe the symptoms, nature of discharge etc. Nasal discharge is always clear, he usually gets a lighter version of whatever illness is going on in the family, recovers more quickly, etc.
3] Is there any trouble with your CHEST or HEART? Not that we're aware of
4] Is there any trouble with your voice or speech? Seems ok
5] Is there any difficulty in breathing? No
6] Do you have cough? Not currently
7] Is it more at any particular time? Occasionally he will 'choke' on his own saliva and cough/sputter. In fact he does that about once a day. Possibly still has GER/GERD, which I suspected since about a month old.



As for his temperament or personality, he wakes up cheerful, seems to be the kind that isn't surprised by anything, just takes it all in stride, enjoying life and very curious and pays attention to the details. Kind of a 'take life by the horns' kind of kid. Not scared by much of anything, willing to explore anything we'll let him. Strong willed. Loves to laugh with his brother. Very vocal...will make loud noises to tell the world what he wants and when.

When he gets cranky or tired, every little thing is a big problem, things he normally would be fine with when not cranky, are now a huge cry fest that needs Mommy to soothe him. He wants to be held a lot, carried around, bounced. He wants to be distracted by new things, gets bored easily with the same toys, complains and doesn't want me to be out of his sight. Gets very whiny about things he can't have---if you take away an unsafe item or toy he will cry with tears. Seems like he tries hard to keep himself occupied with toys or playing, so if you take away something that was keeping him occupied, he falls apart because he was using the distraction to keep himself from bursting out crying.

Right now with teething and the possible ear infection (didn't take him to the doc for that, just using garlic oil in both ears), he has been fussier than normal, clingy and fighting sleep a bit more than usual. Sometimes it takes 2-3 tried to get him down for a nap--meaning I try to put him down, nurse him, maybe he'll close his eyes for 5 minutes, then be ready to be up and playing again. Repeat in an hour or half an hour, then I might need to do that again, before he'll actually go to sleep. He falls asleep the easiest when he is utterly exhausted, and the most difficult when he is only just a little sleepy.

I stopped the chamomile/Nat Phos/Mag phos routine when my naturopath said to try Pulsatilla, and I was trying with that 3 pellets dissolved in water and given at bedtime, and repeated every time he woke up. I wouldn't do any more than 15 pellets total. That did nothing for him, so I stopped it, tried the Remedy Finder and tried Nux Vomica, which I already had on hand, and got nowhere with that so I gave up. I purchased a tincture of sleeping herbs (chamomile, valerian, and others) and tried giving him a few drops of that at bedtime last night, and it didn't help.