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Post for Just Sayin

Hello JustSayin,
How are you doing ?
I am 47 years old mother of a 15 years old girl.
I have a history of Anxiety and Depression. Homeopathy has helped me a lot on easing my mental diseases. So I trust Homeopathy a lot.
I have a problem going on here:
My husband always tries to control me on everything. I can’t do nothing on my own without his permission.
It’s like I need to report him about every single thing. So I tend to argue with him often. I had been an independent woman my whole life and now I can’t tolerate anyone’s nagging.
He has threatened me and my daughter so many times to leave his house. This is happening because I do not have any job right now. I am totally relied on him for everything eventhough I have invested a lot of my savings towards the down payment of this house.
I do not like him controlling me. My personality doesn’t liked to be controlled, no matter what.
I just want to get a suitable job and be strong financially, so he doesn’t treat me like this. He knows that I have nowhere to go to and I can do nothing against him. On the top, the place where I live is a small city and has very limited jobs. So it’s hard to find any suitable one.
All I need now is a confidence on doing everything on my own again.
I am kind of depressed now. My head is congested. I feel so helpless. I don’t know how to react when he says “Get out of my house”. I do not know what are the rights for a wife. I am an educated person but here I feel like I am dumb. I am so stuck in this marriage. I can’t get out and feel free because I do not have a confidence in me anymore. I do not want to seek legal help either yet. I will if it becomes too much. I am being very patient and tolerant in this case so far. I still think running away from this relationship is not a solution for me as our society will not spare me and won’t support a single woman. I have had this experience before already.
I just want to regain my confidence.
My head is congested and I am so stressed out because of the continuous job search and continuous failure.
I easily get stressed out, that’s why my confidence level has gone so down these days. If I could handle this stress then I would have done any kind of job in this world.
I have taken a few dosages of Kali Phos 6X since yesterday evening so far.
I am really scared of bad events happening in my life. I am so cautious in my life that I try nothing goes wrong. So I tolerate things just not to have bad happenings in my life. But people take advantage of it. Just because I do not have a job like before does not mean my husband can treat me like anything.
His behavior is challenging my self respect. I also fear of loneliness.
I know nobody can fix my husband’s behavior but I am requesting you to help me to become mentally strong to fight with odds. I am having this brain fog and head congestion. I would appreciate if you could help me prescribing some remedies.
Please help.
 
  depression1 on 2023-09-30
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Did domestic problems cause your current illness and subsequent job loss, or did job loss cause domestic problems and current illness?

What affects you more emotionally, financial insecurity and lack of confidence, or disrespect and abuse in your marriage?

Also, have you ever taken Nat-m, Staphisagria, Aurum Metallicum, Lycopodium for any of your problems?
 
JustSayin2 last month
My domestic problems have been causing my illness since I was about 10-11 years old. Before, It was my parents’ ill relationship and after marriage its my husband’s frustrating and irritating behavior. he is much older than I am, that might be one of the reasons that we have clashes between us regarding any issues.
All I believe is, Issues can be either solved or can be ignored to avoid arguments. But my mind is too sensitive to tackle with arguments or issues. When I fight with my husband I feel so vulnerable because of the anxiety. People say I am a very quiet person, but when it comes to irritation caused by my husband, I tend to defend myself and shout and quarrel. I hate to fight but to protect myself from his ill vibes negative emotions I can’t just stay quiet.
I just want to say “Leave me alone” but I expect someone by my side to say “It’s okay, I am there for you” “Nothing will go wrong “
Whenever my daughter throws tantrum to me or bug me I just feel so weak because this teenager is giving me so much trouble and I am fighting with this situation all alone because my husband’s action just makes it worse. He was never good to solve any problems so they always come to my head. And I am so overwhelmed now.
He threatens us saying “Leave this house” to avoid the problems. He never tries to solve them together, being there for me ever.
I do not want to break this marriage, I don’t know may be I am to weak to take any steps, may be I fear the consequences (bad) after I get out of this marriage or may be I am too good to hurt someone’s feelings. I just hate myself for being so vulnerable and weak.

My job loss was because I had to move to another state as he got a job in this state. His first official job ever. It was not my choice.
I hate the most when he tries to control me or command me.
I am also very fearful about the bad consequences from any of my actions.

Yes I have taken all the above mentioned remedies time to time prescribed by previous homeopaths or advisors here in abchomeopathy.

Please suggest.
Thank you in advance
[Edited by depression1 on 2023-10-02 18:36:57]
 
depression1 last month
For your current problems of brain fog and head congestion, try Gelsemium 30c, single dose, and just observe for a week. It can also help with depression and anxiety, it will help to calm your mind in difficult situations both at home and outside (job search). Remedies that deal with other mental/emotional issues will come later. Keep me posted of any updates.

Directions - Drop a single pellet of the remedy into a cup of water, stir gently to dissolve the pellet completely and take only a teaspoon at a time, one teaspoon constitutes a single dose.
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hello,
Thank you for the remedy suggestion. I will take a dose of Gelsemium 30 as per your advice. I appreciate it.
I wanted to share you one more thing. I am scheduled to do a minor surgery for Uterine Polyps . I am kind of nervous/anxious as what to expect. I am having terrible thinkings as well. I am kind of scared too thinking what if something goes wrong and something bad happens to me. I am nervous most of the time these days.
Will the same remedy help me remain calm for my surgery which is in 3-4 days from now ? Or do I need another remedy along with this one ?
Please suggest
 
depression1 last month
Gelsemium (Gels.) will help in cases of apprehensions about an upcoming event with fears of negative outcomes. It should work in your case if taken 3 days in advance, to clear your mind of pessimistic/gloomy thoughts.

Here is the list of other remedies that are indicated during preparation for surgery, for your reference.
- For particular fear of surgery, only Aethusa is indicated, use 30c if you feel the need of it. Can be used after Gels.
- For terror feeling before surgery – Aconite 6c.

It is also best to take a dose of Arnica 6c a day before you go in for surgery, it will help prepare the body for the trauma of surgery and also lead to less blood loss during the process. This reduces the healing time post surgery. Calendula 6c can also be used post-surgery to help the skin heal quicker from cuts.

Are you sensitive to homeopathic remedies in general, do you tend to have aggravations or any kind of lingering symptoms after taking single doses of remedies? I have to ask this as many are very sensitive and tend to have aggravations that last for a few days. If this is the case, take only Gels. now and Arnica the day before surgery.
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hello,
I have aggravation from some homeopathic remedies but not all.
So I will just go with Gelsemium 30 and Arnica 6c .
I already had a dose of Gel 30 yesterday. I think its working towards my fear of the surgery as I am less fearful than before now. When should I take the next dose of Gel ? Today is 4th and I have the surgery on 9th. I will order Arnica 6 c and Calendula 6c as well.
Please suggest.
Thank you for your help.
 
depression1 last month
It is best not to take another dose so soon after the first. If symptoms change, let me know, if the original symptoms return then there is scope for another dose of Gels otherwise not.
 
JustSayin2 last month
Well, I am not sure how to express my condition at the moment. I thought I was okay on the fear part after having that one dose of Gelsemium 30. But I have figured that I do not think about it all the time but whenever I think about the surgery day, I still get anxious.
Now I do not have time to buy Aethusa 30 to use.
Please suggest how do I take Aconite 6c if I have to use it. Should I use it with Gel 30 ?

My head congestion and heaviness has not been improved. My head heaviness is due to too much pressure I put on searching jobs. It was so overwhelming for me. I never could take on too much pressure on my mind. If I do I feel like I am having a breakdown.
I still don’t have confidence on myself. I feel like I can’t do anything in life besides arguing with my husband, besides feeling pathetic and helpless. I only complaint about things now. I was a very confident person before, now I feel like I am in a jail. Someone is using me as a puppet. I am still depressed

Your suggestion would be highly appreciated

Thank you.
 
depression1 last month
You can use Aconite alone if you feel terrified about an upcoming operation, just being anxious will not help, the anxiety has to be greater for Aconite to work. So bear this in mind if you decide to take it. It doesnt need to be mixed with Gels.

You can try single dose of Calc-carb 30c if you have it with you at the moment, for following list of symptoms
- Anxiety when thinking about the problem.
- Complaining.
- Head congestion from mental exertion.

Directions - Drop a single pellet of the remedy into a cup of water, stir gently to dissolve the pellet completely and take only a teaspoon at a time, one teaspoon constitutes a single dose.

Meanwhile, you can describe any major physical complaints you have, which will help me to decide on the remedies that can help you with your major mental symptoms. As you are already too close to surgery, it is best to postpone this until you have fully recovered.
[Edited by JustSayin2 on 2023-10-06 08:52:37]
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hello JustSayin
How are you ?
I would like to update you my condition this afternoon.
I had my D&C surgery this morning. I just took a dose of Arnica 6c the day before as you suggested.
I didn’t take Aconite. I was trying to be brave. I think the dose of Gels that I took few days ago still worked for me because,
I was a little anxious and nervous at the hospital but not terrified or not extremely anxious thinking about the surgery.

I am not bleeding heavily. The hospital gave me pain medication there and I have some prescription pain killers as well. There is a pain at the moment but not too much that I should take any pain medication. There is just a mild effect of Anesthesia which I think might go away soon. Overall my condition is not as bad as I was thinking “what if something goes wrong”.

So please suggest if I have to take Arnica 6c or Calendula 6c for fast recovery.

Thank you so much for your timely help. I am really grateful to you and the homeopathy.
Regards
 
depression1 last month
Hello,

Im doing fine, thank you for asking.
I am really glad to hear the good news that some of the remedies and recommendations helped you during your surgery and also helped you recover from the fear of it. It is always a feeling of satisfaction to witness or be part of the healing process through remedies. It simply gives confidence in both the authenticity and truthfulness of the homeopathic literature, which is always essential for both the patient and the prescriber.

To speed up recovery, dissolve a single pellet of Arnica 6c and Calendula 6c in separate cups of water and take a teaspoonful dose each day for a week, at least 15 minutes apart. This should help speed up your recovery.
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hello Just Sayin,
Hope you are well.
I took the remedies Calendula 6c and Arnica 6c as per your advice for a week post D & C surgery.

After that, I went for a 2 weeks follow up check up day before yesterday. The doctor told me some portion of the stitches have not dissolved yet and she said its gonna be dissolve soon and I don’t have to worry about it.
I do not have pain now but there is a mild discomfort inside. Hope that will go away soon.

If I am allowed to take any other remedies during this time I am updating you my mental state as of now:
My head is so congested and has dullness of mind. I feel like I am not doing anything worthy in life. Being a housewife against my will and my situation is giving me so hard time. I am in a small city and there is rarely any opportunities that interest me or I can do according to my capabilities.
I am so reluctant to do an IT job despite having a training thinking about my mind being sensitive and not able to handle any stress. I think even if I get an IT job anyhow, I feel like “What if I am too stressed out because of the workload and have a mental breakdown “. I panic if I feel stressed. If I am in stress, I shout at others. When I am in stress I just want to say “Leave me alone”.

Right now , my husband is back home for a month and my daughter goes to school and she doesn’t care whether I am okay or not whether I need any help on chores or not, she has become so insensitive towards me. I am so lonely. I do not have a job, I do not have small kids with whom I can be busy with. I have become so pathetic. Not too many things interest me. I have become so lazy.
I applied in jobs which are available here but I always get rejected.
The jobs that are left to apply is a Heavy Lifting warehouse jobs.
I feel so so stuck here in this place, where I do not find any outlets.
I don’t know how will I solve my problem. I am very disappointed and frustrated. I just have my complaints left with me now.
I am so stuck in the relationship, so stuck in the place, so stuck inside the situation that I never wanted to be in.
I cannot just rebel and go do things on my own because of my anxiety and depression problems. I am not that confident to take steps in life. And also don’t like others being controlling towards me.
If I don’t earn and not self sufficient, then its obvious that I must be okay being a puppet of my husband and my self respect is not letting me do that. I don’t know how to lead my life further.

I am sorry I am just pouring my thoughts here. I am stuck in the middle of nowhere.

Please advise
 
depression1 last month
As the stitches have not yet dissolved, it is best not to take any remedies for your mental symptoms as the body is still in the process of full recovery.
You can resume taking a single dose of Calendula 6c daily for a week.

In the meantime, you can continue to share your thoughts, which will help me to understand your condition better. Also, the act of writing can be cathartic, it will help you to come to terms with what is really bothering you mentally as you try to put it into words. Ive seen that once the fears and worries are laid bare and exposed with actual written words, their grip on the mind slowly slips away, allowing you to be more mindful of the present rather than being preoccupied with the past and the future, this kind of thinking breeds disease and should be avoided; remedies can help, but being aware of this tendency of the mind, will eventually help to get rid of it.
[Edited by JustSayin2 on 2023-10-27 19:42:28]
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hope this helps in some small way.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEpa-9-E...
 
JustSayin2 last month
Hello JustSayin
Hope you are well.

Thank you for all your support and help towards me.
I am really grateful for your selfless help regarding my mental and physical problems. I appreciate it.

I am here to give you updates about my present condition.
Lately, I took two dosages of Calendula 6c but I stopped taking the remedy after two days as I was having continuous mild cramping in my lower abdomen (most probably the scars inside my uterus). I waited for 3 days but for the last two days I have a feeling that the cramps have increased and now its continuous moderate cramps especially when I sit, lie down, or when my bladder is full.
I am not sure of the reason behind these cramps. I was hoping the pain would gradually go away with time but its been 3 weeks of my surgery and my pain has emerged again. The pain was lessening after 15-16 days of surgery but for the last 2 days, I have felt the pain has started again.
I am not sure if there is an infection now. I do not have a fever, I do not have any thick yellow discharge(I have slight discharge as I used to have before my surgery but a little yellowish after the surgery). I feel so tired and sluggish and most importantly, when I am in any kind of pain, my brain cannot concentrate on other things.
I am starting a part-time job in a few days where I have to lift heavy boxes as well. I want to be healed by then.
Please suggest what should I do to get better quickly.
Thank you once again.
 
depression1 3 weeks ago
It seems that Calendula may have caused this bladder cramping pain.
Try Arnica 6c, single dose, that should take care of it.
 
JustSayin2 3 weeks ago
For general weakness and tiredness and to speed up the recovery process, you can take a single dose of Gels 30c.

It is good to hear that you have found something to distract you from your problems. I would just add that you should let it play out as it is and dont burden your mind with expectations. Even if you dont fit in, keep reminding yourself that this is just a humble beginning and it doesnt have to be big or perfect for it to work. In time, as you gain the strength to overcome all those mental limitations that have been bothering you for some time, you will eventually develop the will to do great things in your life.

Best wishes.
 
JustSayin2 3 weeks ago
Hello,
Thank you for your remedies suggestion. I just took a dose of Arnica 6c at 1 pm. When can I take a dose of Gel 30 if I have to take it as well ? Can I take it in the evening? Please suggest
Regards
 
depression1 3 weeks ago
Do you still have cramps after taking Arnica?

Yes, you can take single dose of Gels. in the evening if it is convenient for you.

Directions - Drop a single pellet of the remedy into a cup of water, stir gently to dissolve the pellet completely and take only a teaspoon at a time, one teaspoon constitutes a single dose.
 
JustSayin2 3 weeks ago
Hello,
I think Arnica helped me with my pain. On the day I took Arnica, I think I also had an aggravation on that night. I had a cramp and I was nauseous too for sometime . The next day by morning I was okay.
But Now I do not have cramps anymore. Do I still have to take Gelsemium ?
Please suggest
[Edited by depression1 on 2023-11-12 02:21:39]
 
depression1 2 weeks ago
Gels. was not recommended for cramps and lower abdominal pain.
Gels. was for general weakness and tiredness as mentioned in your post 5 days ago, and for some of your ongoing mental symptoms.
 
JustSayin2 2 weeks ago
Hello Just Sayin’
Hope you are well.
I took the dose of Gels as well the day before yesterday at night.
I did not feel any effect until yesterday night. Since yesterday night, my head has been heavy and has dull ache.
And I am missing my Dad again. He passed away in February of 2022.
It took me about a year to overcome the Grief of his passing.
It was so hard for me to cope that grief. It was sudden and an accident. So my mind couldn’t process the grief easily. He suffered a lot in his life mentally. He used to find his happiness in me only. I tried my best to make sure about his well-being despite the fact that I was here in the US and he was back home. I really tried my best to make him smile, still I feel I didn’t do enough. I could have done much more.
Now, For the past 2-3 days I have been missing him again (Before taking Gelsemium)Specially when I am not busy in anything. A homeopath prescribed Ambra Grisea 200 for me, which helped me cope with the grief.
Can I take Ambra again so it eases the feeling of missing him badly ?
I am having a depressed mood at the moment.

Also I have started my part time job where I need to lift heavy boxes as well. I feel like my Uterus has not been healed completely. I have this mild pain and discomfort in my lower abdomen since I have been continuously lifting the boxes for 5 hours.
Too much Physical work. It’s a good exercise but because of the surgery I am finding it little challenging this time. This is a seasonal job and I worked here last year too. It wasn’t this bad that time. Please suggest .
Thank you for listening to me.
Regards
 
depression1 last week
You can try Ambra Grisea 200 if it gave you some relief last time, let me know if it also helps with abdominal pain from lifting.
If this does not bring relief in the lower abdomen from over-lifting, try Bellis-Perennis 30c.

Is this the same pain, without the cramps, that Arnica helped with, or is it something completely different?
Because the last cramping pain you had before was bladder cramping as a result of the Gels. and may have nothing to do with the surgery.

For your mental symptoms, Nat-mur 200c would have been more suited to the kind of grief with depression you are experiencing. But that can come later, continue with Ambra Grisea 200c. Prepare the water solution with a pellet of Ambra Grisea and take a teaspoon.
 
JustSayin2 last week
Hello JustSayin,

Thank you for your remedy suggestion. I will take Ambra as per your instructions.
Below is my answers to your questions:

- This pain is just like the one Arnica helped me ease last time.
It’s milder than what I was experiencing right after surgery, but still is bothersome. Makes me sluggish.
The pain has been increased since I started working in this place (I am guessing, due to heavy physical work?)

- The pain that was relieved by Arnica was I believe due to Calendula 6c and not Gelsemium.
I am pasting your post here as a reference: please see “ It seems that Calendula may have caused this bladder cramping pain. Try , Arnica 6c, single dose, that should take care of it.”

-I have not had this kind of pain before surgery. Whenever I mentioned about my pain with you, it’s the pain after the polyps from my Uterus have been removed. So it’s always my Uterus Pain.
I never had bladder problem.

Will keep you updated.
Thanks and regards
 
depression1 last week
You are correct in pointing out that it was the Calendula and not the Gels, and that I had made a typo in my previous post. As this piece of information was brought up by me to get clarification on the nature of these pains and not part of any suggestion, so it is best to ignore that error.

If Arnica helped you with the same pain and if its the same post-surgery pain and if Ambra doesnt help then try Arnica again before trying anything else, if the pain gets worse after doing heavy lifting.

One more thing I would like to add, when you present your symptoms like pain, mention it in a way that leaves no doubt in the mind of the prescriber about the nature of the pain and its origins, if you are not specific then the prescriber will add details while doing remedy searches based on these non-specific symptoms. This is something every prescriber has to do, otherwise no one can prescribe for these symptoms. So give full details. If you say lower abdominal pain, it leaves room for speculation as to which organ may be at fault, so in the interest of time I will go ahead and prescribe based on what seems obvious.
[Edited by JustSayin2 on 2023-11-17 04:09:59]
 
JustSayin2 last week

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