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So far so good. Improvement appearing after the aggravation is a very promising sign.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
great. My period came today and even so I feel better. Will keep reporting
merce last decade
Thursday afternoon:

exhausted from 4:30pm. Fighting, fighting, fighting to sit by desk. I love the work I have in front of me right now, it is lighter and more enjoyable, it consists in refining text writen, finally I have time to inhabit the text rather than rushing through it as usual, but constantly drop. I last about an hour and suddenly drop, have to lie down,

There seems to be a pattern in the last 3-3 days where mornings are quite good and by late afternoon all gone. Not sure if pattern is new or not, may be more pronounced. Every single cell of my body is exhausted, body disintegrating. Sometimes I sit in bed with lots of pillows to hold my whole body, and take the computer and I can work like that a little longer until everything blurs I am not able to pay attention, to receive any more information, possibility to do has come to an end, arms drop, cannot hold mouse, eyes refuse to see, exhausted, off, all down, dropped.

Period might have something to do with this. Having period has always affected by energy a lot, up to 7 days before it comes and while having it. And I have this endometriosis issues.

On a different line, received blood test results yesterday. Calcium and vitamin D are very low, everything else good. This is surprising as I am and have been taking supplements for the last 3 months, among which there is 200mg of calcium daily. I have milk in my coffee every day, yogurt everyday and cheese every other day.


It occurred to me that my physical appearance looks pretty much like the my tired feeling. I do not have well defined outlines, my appearance seems slightly blurred, pale skin seems to have a kind of halo, or like cotton, no outline defined no gravity, weightless, light, no tension. Cotton like face framed by dark hair, but skin does not seem to function to contain energy, there is no vital form, outline of mouth is not sharply defined, eyes look dreamy (dark and intense at the same time punctuate/inside cotton), thougth is not there, it continually escapes or leaks out and goes somewhere else, distracted. As a child I always felt I look different to all other children without exception, with this paleness, slightly blurred features

[message edited by merce on Thu, 16 Jun 2011 20:55:17 BST]
[message edited by merce on Thu, 16 Jun 2011 20:57:23 BST]
[message edited by merce on Thu, 16 Jun 2011 21:07:52 BST]
[message edited by merce on Thu, 16 Jun 2011 21:11:39 BST]
[message edited by merce on Thu, 16 Jun 2011 21:20:40 BST]
merce last decade
And here we have these words and expressions cropping up again. They are not covered by Stannum. From a Sensation perspective, this is the true remedy, because it is the most pecuilar and inexplicable part of the case.

I would use the Olfactory dose we discussed earlier, right away. After that we can look at using highly diluted doses of the Stannum, to work out if this remedy will actually cure you.

If not, I am going to need to explore this strange description of your fatigue. My ears have definitely pricked up around it - there is something important trying to make itself heard there.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
OK, sounds very good. Thank you again for following up.

I am propped up in bed with pillows, hence unable to prepare dose just now but will definitely take it in the morning. It is 22:44.
merce last decade
Friday 17th 10:58am

I have taken the olfactory dose at this time (20m. bottle with vodka)

This morning as good as previous days.
I have slept very well.
(had taken one indometacine pill which probably helped sleep, as I felt a thread of ciatica (lower back nerve pain), and wanted to prevent inflamation fron dumpness as I got bit soaked cycling in the rain 35min. to city centre).
merce last decade
try not to suppress your symptoms with orthodox medication, as it blocks the action of the remedy as well, if you can help it. Orthodox medication should be kept for emergencies.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
I will remember this.

the indometacine in this occasion was taken 12 hours ago, so its presence / effects should be cleared.
merce last decade
I feel heavy and dumb, the parts of my body, legs when walking, arms when typing, head feel like lead metal. It is a different feeling, even opposite in the sense of my usual feeling where Ii feel tired and drop without feeling any gravity or weight. Dropping then is more like and end point, it marks an end to the thin flow of energy, where all tension that allows for movement loses out, as if strings holding puppet or marionette doll on miniature stage are cut off. That is the reason for dropping. It is weightless body of puppet, made of paper/card, but with no strings to articulate and infuse tension in the different parts of body, body drops.

I feel a bit disorientated, would need some support to continue working, may be some food but not really hungry, not comfortable working as I was a couple of hours ago. I had taken a break to go to buy food before it starts raining heavily, and felt dumb after.
[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 13:31:32 BST]
[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 14:23:17 BST]
[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 16:20:57 BST]
merce last decade
it is now 16:15,

increased feeling of heaviness/gravity as if limbs made of lead metal still there but noticeably less intense, I recovered orientation, and can concentrate ok with work.

there has not been a feeling of nervousness since I took dose.

it is raining a lot, may be heavy air pressure as external condition

[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 16:22:15 BST]
[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 19:04:02 BST]
merce last decade
today I have not dropped to the point of having to lie down until this time at night.

I have been sleepy all day, cant remember clearly if that was the case before taking stannum, think not

drop to lie down comes just now
[message edited by merce on Fri, 17 Jun 2011 21:24:48 BST]
merce last decade
Repeat the olfactory dose again.

Olfaction allows more frequent dosing.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
OK, is there a more or less defined period of time within which olfactory dose shows effects from the moment it is taken?

will take 2nd in the morning. It is now 23:15
merce last decade
As long as you hit the bottle each time, each dose is altered sufficiently from the last to continue the positive changes of the remedy. If aggravation happens, then you stop. If there is no aggravation you can continue.

Just report each day and we can assess how things go.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
OK, so in principle it is a dose a day
merce last decade
1:28 a.m. insomnia.
this evening I left my desk and encounter one of my flamates in the kitchen. he initiated conversation and I felt dumb on answering as if I was dreaming asleep

I am a bit scared to try another doese tomorrow. I would love feel as normal as possible, connected to world as much as possible. Perhaps it is needed that I take at least another doese to be certain about stanum, but is it ok to delay dose for one day? as well as reasons just given, this would also indicate if these series feelings/experiences today are due to stannum or if they continue without it. ..
merce last decade
If you are worried don't take the dose. There is no particular way to run this, it is all individualized depending on you, the person who is sick.

And again I hear something that makes me wonder if Stannum is the deepest remedy - 'connected to the world'.

The olfactory dose didn't make things worse though did it?

The aggravation, should it come, is the sign that things will turn around, so don't fear it.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
You mean, if there is some agravation, is a good sign?

I have mixed feelings as to whether there has been agravation or if stannum made thigns worse today.

good effects: seemed more able to keep working at my desk in sitting position, it seemed to give endurance

bad effects today:
1_feeling dumb, not really clear head, just about able to work, not well articulated when speaking and writing.

2_heavy limbs, body, exagerated feeling of gravity, not natural, to world, feels unreal. I dont like at all.

3_The feeling of heavy limbs and dumbness give a sense toward disconnection with world as if being in another dream word. I feel I have to make extra effort to stay, grab this world, as when one faints and fights to not loose consciousness, but without the feeling of fainting.


conclusion: what I may consider agravation or the list of bad effects today is not on my usual symptoms of fatigue, it is on unknown symptoms which are entirely new to me, except for insomnia and the overall outcome of feeling disconnection, which are typical. Is this kind of 'unkown' agravation also a sign that this is the right remedy or not?

I definitely would like to not take dose tomorrow and see if these bad effects dissapear. After I feel hesitation, may be try once more?
merce last decade
Wait, you have a whole range of new symptoms? Is that right?

Stop the remedy, take no more of it. New symptoms are signs of a proving or of suppression.

I will need to reasses. Do nothing more for the moment.
[message edited by brisbanehomoeopath on Sat, 18 Jun 2011 03:15:49 BST]
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
I thought that i would try once more to make sure they are from stannum and not from the heavy rainy day yesterday or my imagination, but the heaviness of limbs seemed very distinct and was entirely new. The dumbness felt very similar to the las time I took a pillule

I stop as you suggest (unless you tell me that you would like to try once more to confirm these new symptoms)

8:14. I hae probably slept about 4 hours with a little Valium and drowsing allergens. I feel as good as I can be this morning, working very well. You mentioned I should not supress symptoms with western medicine while taking homeopathy. Does it include things to make me sleep? If I stoped this when I need it, it I would fear it would affect my work rythms, not sure. i can also work thorugh the night and just wait till I can naturally sleep. Is this better?
merce last decade
Do not change anything. If you currently use medication regularly stay on it. If you only use the medication when things come up, do not use it, unless the situation is dangerous for you not to.

Anything you use to suppress symptoms also makes it harder to see if the homoeopathy is working.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
bit more graphic description of one of symtpoms yesterday:

feeling is opposite usual:

usual: feeling like cotton, weighless and no skin or outline to contain energy and not nerves or strings to keep tension necessary to move

stannum yesteday is exactly opposite but not really helpful:
heavy like lead metal limbs (gravity extreme, I feel walking leg/foot does not rest on floor but hits the floor quicker because is much heavier), I feel there is skin to contain because there is some kind gas, something the inflates me inside, like baloon, this pressure skin does contain, but this gas that seems to occupy more space than than my body outline, and which is inside, makes me feel dumb, and like in a dream, not there, not clear mind. It was more noticeable when I leave desk and walk and talk to flatmates, working at desk in sitting possition got better
[message edited by merce on Sat, 18 Jun 2011 08:33:09 BST]
merce last decade
Yeah this is not stannum, that description is something else entirely. What it is, I will have to work out.

When you use those words, describe to me the image or images that come to you.

Speak them out loud, and close your eyes, tell me what appears in your mind, anything at all.

Speak them again, in what way do you want to move your hands or body.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
need to finish a piece of work to send out in 90 minutes. will concentrate then and try to draw more images of the feeling
I imagine you refer to the 'usual' light feeling and not to lead gravity feeling.
merce last decade
They are opposite feelings so the same feeling - they are just part of a polarity, which will be the same remedy.

Remedies, even the wrong ones, will invoke a response by the vital force, which is still in keeping with its natural defensive posture. So the symptoms that come up are still relevent to prescribing.
brisbanehomoeopath last decade
thank you!, this is clear, nice to understand.
So you are asking me to describe both, what i feel without and with stannum
merce last decade

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