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Could any Dr. help me with fears of flying/heights? Page 4 of 33

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Sameer this is so tough!
Sorry for the long winded reply in advance....

I feel like i should be helping you choose just one but i identify with both remedies.

I will list below things i felt explained me the best and add a bit to it.

Puls:

Fears: Heights. Claustrophobia. Insanity. Dark. Robbers. Mirrors. (as a kid i got freaked out when school mates played 'bloody mary' in the dark at school bathroom. since then i still dont like to be around mirrors in the dark, although i dont freak out if i am but its almost 2nd nature to avoid)

Wandering arthritis
She needs support and reassurance.
deeply emotional, sentimental and sympathetic.

She also weeps during any confrontation.----I do not weep in front of people anymore, if i do, it is just tears from eyes, even when alone i dont let myself cry like i feel i could or should. but, in past i have been a bit more emotional in person, now i have gotten better at controlling them. (or suppressing them)

Generally chilly or even freezing but may be very warm-blooded. (But while the general temperature is variable, the reaction to temperature in certain organ systems is quite fixed: head and stomach symptoms are better by cold and worse heat or hot applications; chest symptoms are worse from cold and better from heat.) Example--my limbs get very cold and achy and are sensitive to touch and cold, they crave warmth. But ive noticed my circulation and lymph is less congested or clogged when i alternate hot water therapy with cold water.

I do consider myself feminine but i have a strong male streak in me also.
I crave the dominance in a relationship but then i also am stubborn and dont want to be controlled, much like a man.

If i come across a man that is too feminine and too involved in my emotional state, a male energy within me will act out....but if i come across a masculine energy, i am instantly drawn to it, and i become naturally feminine, submissive, involved in serving the man. its an inner struggle for me because its hard to let myself be submissive unless i feel its appreciated and returned in different ways. if any of that makes sense?? i hope so!

I am dark brown hair, brown eyes-greenish when crying or in sunshine, fair skin that tans easily but rarely burns.

Amenorrhea prone and short duration of period---i am currently under a suppression of some kind as my period has not arrived and it is day 35 of cycle.

Sexual energy is generally high, even excessive in some cases. In women there is more often an emphasis on emotional connection rather than sex. There may be an aversion to sex based on strongly held moral or religious beliefs--I do need a certain emotional attentiveness but never as the expense of masculinity.

Sleeps on back with arms overhead.

The patient himself may state that, 'no two stools' or 'no two periods' are the same. However, as Nancy Herrick of the Hahnemann Clinic has taught, often the prescriber finds this characteristic after a frustrating interview during which the patient finds difficulty describing her symptoms because, 'I just can't seem to find a pattern!'
--patterns are hard for me to detect at times.

Phos:

Fears: death, alone in dark, ghosts, robbers,

Easily reassured--i am not easily reassured in fear like states. No one can reassure me when i have to fly, people try and i still seek it but i know its not going to help since its something i can only help myself with.

Appearance: thin and often tall, fine featured and long fingered.--thats me. 5'8 120, long piano playin fingers.

Back pains, better motion, better heat, better massage.

The patient seems to 'sparkle' with intelligence, creativity, and enthusiasm. However the patient seems to have no strong boundaries between himself and others; he is not grounded or centered. --- I think overall this is me, and if people dont see it its because i choose not to show this side for fear of rejection of some kind.

may appear 'flighty'. He loves company. He can be gullible and suggestible.

the anxiety takes the form of concern about health. darkness, deep water, death, etc. These fears may develop into a debilitating phobic state. Especially, these fears come when the patient is alone, and are better in company.

The child is both curious and sympathetic for others. trusting nature, gullible.

Mentally distractible and 'spacey'.
Slow, apathetic, dull-minded state (late stage).--i wonder if this is my remedy if i am in late stage? i used to have much interest, curiosity, excitable, open, but it seems the older i get, especially in the last 2 years i have been more ill feeling...i just feel the exact opposite. when i went to chicago i felt alive and excited again, only to return home and become depressed and unmotivated.

I have similarities in both, of course im sure you knew that before i did.

These are my thoughts, glad i dont have to pick one because they are both fitting.

PS.
With the period being late, is this an ars. aggravation? it was getting back on track with phos it seemed. but i also ate raw foods only for about a week and then took a trip, could be stress?
 
jenny57401 last decade
Dear Jenny,

Please take 3 doses of Pulsatilla 30, and report in 1 week.
 
sameervermani last decade
Alright.
Just a reminder...
August 6 i have that dental appt to get 2 cavities filled. If i take puls tomorrow is it still ok to get fillings or should I wait to take puls until after?
 
jenny57401 last decade
Take Puls now, we will know response by Aug 6
 
sameervermani last decade
Thank you
 
jenny57401 last decade
quick question.

the itching of eyes and allergic symptoms that started when i took ars....will this go away when i take puls?

will take puls this morning.
 
jenny57401 last decade
Update on Puls 30

This will be quite long. I'm hoping the details will be useful for the case study.

I will include dreams the days i have them because i noticed a change in them this week and i notice my dreams are affected after remedies are taken.




DAY 1

(day 2 of period)
(already felt in a good mood before taking remedy)

Mental:
-Felt appreciative
-Felt like I should enjoy family and time in South Dakota because I know I will move soon.
-Calm during bike ride
-Happy

Physical:
-Eyes were very red, itchy, watery when sneezing
-I think Hayfever allergies have been the cause of this for past week or two.
-Cat also triggers allergic response. Usually I can 'get used to' a pet dander and not have reaction.
-Skin: no new break outs, clearing.




DAY 2

(day 3 of period)
-no cramps, flow lightens

Dream:
-All recurring content
-high school friends
-road trip
-friend driving, me as passenger, curvy road, she drives too fast, i am nervous because we are in the mountains.
-family around
-at big mall or amusement park

Mental:
-No change in mood
-Pretty easy going
-non dependent
-good mood


Physical:
-very sneezy
-itchy eyes
-runny nose
-NEW tickle in back of throat
-have a need to make myself sneeze to get sinuses to drain or to 'make it go away'
-allergies usually worsen in morning and evening or when close to cat.



DAY 3

(day 4 of period)
-no cramps
-very light flow

Dream:
-Different content than usual
-Cat crawls out of sewer, it is homeless, so i feed it chicken.
-Somehow i get washed into the sewer and i find my way out.
-I find i am homeless.
-I follow a strange fellow-homeless man to find a place of shelter
-We find a stadium.
-I also find a free clinic to go to
-The doctors think i am sweet. I am talkative and in good spirits and they run lots of tests.
-my interpretation of the dream would indicate insecurities that need to be nourished by myself instead of seeking shelter from others. I am in need of love and acceptance, but perhaps specifically in need of self love and acceptance. I am unsure of where i am headed in life and feel a need for an immediate change in ideas and beliefs. I feel my old ways of thinking are not helpful.

Mental:
-very happy today
-productive (finished a scrapbook)
-I went to a work potluck
-enjoyed being around the people
-I didn't talk to boyfriend much that day and i felt ok with that since i was busy
-Not worried about future today
-the scrapbook was for my best friend who passed when i was 19. he was a big part of my life and i had much stress over his death because of how prolonged it was. i had much guilt over not being there physically with him and suppressed many of my bad feelings and anger over it. i'd like to think I've come to deal with those feelings and i felt today that i was able to finally let that part of my life rest and not have any negative feelings about it.
-did not really want to go to bed
-was achy from working on the book all day. didnt feel like even getting undressed to take a shower before bed.

Physical:
-Very achy
-Back was tense, tight, burning.
-Legs felt like they were being crushed.
-These are not new symptoms, have been going on for years. Legs since age 21. Back since age 18. has been progressively getting worse especially if dehydrated. Eating high amounts of veggies help.




DAY 4:

(day 5 of period)
-very light flow, almost brownish
-no cramps

Dream:
-Mobsters
-baby
-a shower with clothes on and with friend
-not a typical recurring dream
-the dream was filled with a bit of crime, but no fear. I was part of a group of kids that were trying to outsmart the mafia. Overall it was not scary.

Mental:
-Started in a good mood.
-As the day wore on, after i received a very deep tissue massage ( i get these weekly for the muscle tension ) a very unpleasant feeling was triggered by something.
-i think i was starting to feel alone again since i had not spoke much with the boyfriend. he was busy during day
-My mom and I have always had tension at times and our attitudes flair up with each other often.
-She does not communicate her feelings very well at all. i do not know if this is what bothers me the most because i have a hard time communicating. she will have an attitude and then act like everything is fine. I know i do the same things as my boyfriend has pointed them out to me before. it really really bothered me this time because i thought i was starting to improve finally. I feel like she is a spoiled brat at times and acts like a baby.
-felt like i must be alone otherwise i would blow up and yell at her and i did not want to do that.
-i did not say anything but i also could not pretend like i was bothered. it was obvious by my silence as i am usually bubbly around my family since i am so comfortable with them.
-when alone, i watched a show called Obsessed and Intervention. these shows made me want to use vicodin again. i havent taken any for years. I used to take up to four 7.5's at a time up to twice a day when i was 21. Haven't had a craving for that in a long time.
-i also identified with a woman on 'obsessed' that suffered from chronic face picking. i had no idea there was a label for that. I often pick at and touch my face because of imperfections. i have scarring. it started when i was 16. i was on cocaine and oxycontins and i think one night i spent hours picking at my face to the point of major lesions all over my face. Since then its been an off and on thing for me to do when acne flares up. i want to get the 'bad stuff' out.
- this made me think of all my fears and phobias and insecurities and how irrational they are.
-went to bed late around 130 am




DAY 5

(last day of period, 6 total days)
-was exclusively brown and mostly spotting.
-some cramps existed.

Mental:
-Very emotional during day.
-mother issue was still bothering me
-felt like no one understands
-considered ways i could get vicodin
-considered leaving town
-thought much about how i could talk to my mother without offending or blaming her for me feeling certain things
-i cried very hard right before work
-wanted to call in sick
-was 15 mins late
-felt borderline insane
-i think if it werent for the people at work i would have continued in whatever state of mind i was in.
-they noticed something was wrong
-i played the humor card and work was fun
-luckily it was slow and the customers didnt effect me.
-i confided in one of the girls but then felt like i shouldnt because its not her problem.
-my boyfriend asked to hang out and i originally said no as if i was pouting
-then i thought i was acting like a child and i need to be around people even if i dont feel like it
-later after work my mother apologized for the issue we had. I also apologized because i felt like it was my fault and i didnt want her to think i didnt appreciate her. we communicated and i felt better after that.
-after that i hung out with my boyfriend and was able to open up about what i was feeling. he seemed receptive and that also made me feel better.
-i wondered what would have happened if they didnt seem receptive. if i would have still been able to speak openly or would i have tried to make excuses for avoiding/suppressing the subject.
-felt a need for coffee or something comforting to get me thru my shift. I drank 2 organic energy drinks (about 150 grams caffeine) maybe this helped me feel better.

Physical:
-noticed new small red bumps in random places on thigh and chest area.
-looks like they will form into some eczema like patches i get at times
-very scaly flaky red patches in hairline
-scalp very very itchy
-skin itchy
-hayfever allergies continue




DAY 6

Dream:
-Boyfriend and grade school (and current) friend was in dream.
-I was receiving hate mail from someone
-my bf and friend were trying to help me figure out who it was.
-Not a recurring dream
-was not afraid in the dream, i felt confused as to who would hate me and want to insult me this way.
- my interpretation: to receive a letter can signify a new opportunity and challenge. or its a message from my unconscious mind. Perhaps i still dislike things about myself and am self critical. to be threatened could indicate that i have internalized some fears and are feeling oppressed.

Mental:
-woke up with an urge to have coffee
-went to work on a fellow massage tech/friend. she does my deep tissue and in return i use the Lymphstar to help decongest her lymphatic system (this is the machine i use on myself to help my lymph congestion drain)
-usually i do not look forward to working on this particular person because she talks a LOT. but i felt more appreciative again today and a bit less selfish and self absorbed. i was happy to get her some coffee and work on her.
-i am a former coffee drinker. i managed a coffee shop in san diego at PLNU. i do have urges to drink coffee often but i do not usually give in to them. i gave in again this morning, just a half cup though.
-i am happier than the last day or so
-i was proud of myself for attempting to deal with and face the unpleasantness of the last day instead of sweeping it under the rug and blaming others for how i feel.
-less desire to pick face
-more control over picking face
-much less judgmental on myself
-and less dependent (not sure if this is because i 'got my fix' after i opened up)
-hoping this is not just an 'up' in my mood swings.

Physical:
-nose is more blocked today
-allergies persist
-very itchy eyes
-urge to make self sneeze still
-tickle in back of throat still there.

Tomorrow is Day 7
i have appointment for two composite fillings in the morning.
 
jenny57401 last decade
So, over all, can we say, the mood seems to have uplifted,there is less anxiety, dependence and selfishness has gone down ?


Sameer
 
sameervermani last decade
Yes, i think there is a positive effect here overall.
 
jenny57401 last decade
I have been trying to pinpoint issues that attribute or cause these fears. Seems like you narrowed it down to dependence?

it gets very confusing for even myself because every situation to me seems different. it seems i have a pattern i just can not determine what it is.

When i try to think about it i work my mind into a deep confusion. I forget things i say and do. Sometimes my boyfriend thinks i'm delusional because i get so lost and away from reality. Other times I'm clear as a bell and make perfect sense.

When thinking about this lately I've noticed how i depend on many things for comfort and reassurance. I look to food almost obsessively. I turn to those close to me for advice constantly. When i realize I am going overboard is usually when i am able to discipline myself enough to stop or control my excessive compulsiveness better. Most of the time i am only able to stop or control patterns for a short time and i will slip into the same thing slowly after i feel like i am doing 'better'

I am so changeable i can't keep track of myself, it is so frustrating.

Do you think Puls is possibly the remedy that will work?
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi jenny,

Please keep Pulsatilla 200c at hand, and come back in 3 days after your dentist appointment.

Sameer
 
sameervermani last decade
alright will need to order that, is there anything else i can order to minimize shipping?

Thanks :)
 
jenny57401 last decade
Pulsatilla 1M can be ordered as well.
 
sameervermani last decade
Hey Sameer,

Its been about 3 days since dentist appt.

Overall pretty good mood. No emotional mood swings at all. If i felt a shift in mood i would observe it and address it and try to resolve or accept it. Going well mentally. Was even motivated to go back to the gym after months of skipping it.

Physically, pretty terrible.

Allergies (especially to cat) worst they have ever been in my life. Ive had this cat for 10 years and have gotten used to her dander (so i thought). Anytime i get near her now in the last few weeks i go nuts. Sneezing, itchy eyes, even a burn in the back of my nose where the entry meets my throat.

No desire for water. dehydrated. Strong desire for coffee. Back pain and discomfort has been more pressing than usual.

I just received Puls 200C and 1M today.

Awaiting direction
Hope all is well :)
Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
I should add,

Although i have a strong desire for coffee its not *just* coffee. I think it is the caffeine that helps my pain. i also like this organic energy drink called jungle love (ha). It seems to get me to not focus so much on the physical discomfort and Its almost like im using it as a 'safe' replacement for vicodin (even tho i know its not good to drink so much caffeine)

I dont feel addicted but i am not disciplining myself enough to stop just yet.
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hey Jenny,

If you are mentally doing good, and physically getting worse, that means disease is moving from mental to physical levels which is the curative direction.

As things are going well mentally, let us wait a bit longer, please update in 3 more days.

We will think about 200c dose at that time.
 
sameervermani last decade
Awesome, thank you thank you :)
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Sameer,

Sorry to bug ya so soon.
I came down with a nasty sinus infection this morning and have had a low grade fever climbing all day, reaching 100 degrees now.

I do not have nausea, just so achy all over body and very warm with occasional chills. I am trying to go to sleep but having troubles.

Is there anything i could take that might help me sleep but not interfere with progress?

This is the same kind of fever i got 5 weeks after taking those stront carb 200c doses, just not as high of a fever this time. Guessing this is good sign you found correct remedy...still in good mood if wasnt feeling so terrible.

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated, thank you sameer.

Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Jenny,

You can use something like Tylenol if you have to.

Otherwise, please let things take their own course.
 
sameervermani last decade
I ended up taking only about 10 drops of white willow in some water thinking this would be better to take vs. over the counter. It didn't help but i eventually got to sleep. I also tried neti pot to relieve congestion and slept with wet cloth over mouth and nose. Walking outside seemed to help symptoms.

Hope the white willow didn't disrupt anything.

Thank you Sameer.
Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
PS.
Just got your message this morning otherwise i would have stuck it out minus the white willow.

Hope you have a good day :)
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Sameer,

Updating you as advised.

At the end of Saturday was when you advised to update in 3 days. It was the very next morning, Sunday, that i awoke with a fever. Very thick yellow nasal discharge with painful sneeze upon awakening. Clear as the day wore on and not as thick. Body became very achy and feverish with chills. Got worse as the day wore on. throat was very sore. itchy eyes continued. I could not get to sleep because of much discomfort mostly due to the fact i couldnt breathe out of my nose, my throat was so irritated it was bothersome to breathe thru it (dry?), and it was so warm...about 78 degrees in house. the aches would have been manageable if not for the rest of symptoms. I laid around for almost 4 hours trying to get to sleep. relief came only when i would walk around and go outside and also with the wet cool cloth over face. Mentally i was still ok.

The next morning on monday the 10th I felt a little better physically upon awakening, was still running a fever over 99.5. I had a 9:00am appointment to work on my massage therapist. I do decongestive lymphatic therapy, so we trade and work on each other. I felt pretty ok physically when going in to work on her. She wanted an hour and a half. Close to the end of the session i started to feel really really ill and i got chills to the point of shivering. i felt very 'light' and as if i could fall over. She worked on me after that and balanced my chakras. She said the middle chakras were 'out'. She also worked on my neck and i felt better after that but my fever stayed with me in the 100 degrees thruout the day. Toward the end of day it eventually lessened to 98. my normal temp is around 97. Drinking cold water made me get chills.

I did notice, when picking up cat this day i did not have as huge of a reaction as before. Still very congested in the head and sinuses thruout the day. Appetite was low but i was not nauseous. Diarrhea, not excessively but noticeable. Overall good mood, a little indecisive in afternoon. was looking for someone to talk to but ended up cleaning instead because i felt like no one was around or wanted to. A bit lethargic and a bit restless by the end of Monday but attribute it to laying around all day and most of sunday.

Overnight i had another shopping dream again, these are recurring. It seemed like i had a better idea of what i was shopping for but people kept interrupting me.

Today, Tuesday, early on i woke up with no fever. Feeling better physically as far as the sickness goes. Glad to have that over with. Still a bit of sinus congestion. The itchy eyes came back a bit more severe. I am noticing the same little tiny red patches randomly placed on my skin. they look like little tiny pimples that heal almost in an eczema type manner and stay for weeks at a time. some on legs, some on side of stomach, some on arms. as they heal they spread out in diameter, flatten and have a minor rough texture to them.

Mentally today, not so good. I was finishing a graphic design project this morning. by the time i finished it it was close to time i had to go to work. I was feeling unloved in a way or like i wasnt getting enough attention from my guy but also understand he is going through some financial difficulties and strains himself so i dont want to be a bother to him. I called in sick to work but ended up going in for only 2 hours. I felt a little better once i got there. but noticed i was being a little pouty with my bf when he finally did speak to me today. He came over after i was done at work but i was quiet and stubborn with communication and honestly, kind of mad its so hard for him to just be affectionate/nurturing with me even tho i look like i dont want to be touched on the outside. On a last note, an overall sum up of today mentally, i feel like i had a million great ideas running thru my head, and i couldnt grab a hold of one of them, let alone figure out how to arrange these great ideas into something that matters. I also noticed today, it felt like i was ovulating. Its only about 7 days after the end of my period. I have tested with the 30 day box test. It seemed i had a hormone surge around day 6 or 7 at that time too which i found odd because i also surged around day 20 or so. I didn't know it was possible to ovulate 2 different times in a month, especially with long cycles like mine.

Really want to let go of this stubbornness and dependency feelings and needs for affection/reassurance all the time. Even when im aware of it it's hard to find a different way to do things. Very hard for me to ask for what i want. on a not -so- good day I wonder sometimes if i even know what i want enough to ask for it.


Thanks Sameer.

Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Sameer,

Feeling better mentally today. Just wanted to add that. Sorry for all the reading above just wanted to be thorough.

Hope all is well,
Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Jenny,

You can take the Pulsatilla 200c dose tomorrow morning.

Dissolve 2 pellets in 250 ml water, and take a teaspoon from there ONCE. Make sure nothing enters the mouth 1 hr before and 1 hr after the dose.

Report in 1 week.
 
sameervermani last decade
Thanks :)
Will do. Have a good week.
Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade
Hi Sameer :)

Its been a week since my dose of 200c. I don't really notice any significant or drastic change. I still am having the hayfever, mostly now just itchy eyes, worse at night and in morning. Sinuses are draining mostly clear mucus. Sneezing urges the same. Scalp is very scaly in some areas of hairline, itchy and flaky all over mostly when wet. The acne is still bothersome and more than i would like but i am trying to not be so obsessive over it. The hayfever i could say is a tad bit better this week but not by a whole lot. I went out of town to visit family. I was a bit more at ease overall than i anticipated before the puls doses. Tho, there was one point when some family inheritance was discussed where i felt i was getting the short end of the stick. I was tearful, angry and kept to myself close to an hour trying to get emotions under control. I think I dealt with it much better than letting it fester, a bit more accepting and thinking of others and 'the big picture' rather than just myself. Able to go with the flow a bit better. Overall this week i was enjoying the moment more than i usually do and mentally was able to maintain mood without too many imbalances. Not a lot of major changes i've noticed aside from getting over that fever. But I do feel like I am able to express my emotions a bit easier also without feeling 'exposed,' (without feeling a need for defensiveness or protecting self.) I also feel a bit less obsessive about things, food, ideas, at the moment. Doing better i think :)

Will await your comments and/or direction, thanks so much.

Jenny
 
jenny57401 last decade

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